Mallard Fillmore by speedboat_lou 7-26-03

B-b-but VOTING MACHINES that leave no PAPER TRAIL are DANGEROUS to DEMOCRACY! It's only a problem if KIDS hack into the SYSTEM... ... because their TEACHERS don't TEACH them how to COUNT in PUBLIC SCHOOLS... ...'cause you're all LIBERALS.

Mallard Fillmore (2) by speedboat_lou 7-26-03

*Washington Post, July 26, 2003 B-b-but we CAN'T print that Secretary of State John T. Willis called the VOTING MACHINE SCANDAL "technological hysteria"! Why not? B-b-because then we'd have to admit that our CONCERNS about electronic voting machines are TOTALLY WITHOUT MERIT! I don't see what's so WRONG with ADMITTING you were LYING... ...you liberals were wrong about IRAQ, too.

Mallard Fillmore (3) by speedboat_lou 7-26-03

*Washington Post, July 26, 2003 B-b-but Secretary of State John T. Willis also said that " you can postulate all kinds of things"* about ELECTRONIC VOTING MACHINES... He's right - you can. But that's what you liberals DO... ... you're all COWARDS like the FRENCH.

Mallard Fillmore (4) by speedboat_lou 7-26-03

*Washington Post, July 26, 2003 B-b-but Secretary of State John T. Willis said that "there are so many checks and balances" with ELECTRONIC VOTING MACHINES - we can't print THAT! Why not? It's true... You liberals seem to have a little problem with the TRUTH... ...we killed Saddam's SONS, didn't we?

Mallard Fillmore (5) by speedboat_lou 7-26-03

Washington Post, July 26, 2003 B-b-but I'm TIRED of quoting Secretary of State John T. Willis! He isn't even Secretary of State anymore!* Well, BILL CLINTON isn't PRESIDENT anymore, is he? Can the week be over now?

I wonder - is it possible to do a parody of "Mallard Fillmore" that's actually funny, or would that ruin the accuracy of it? It might just have to be an SCTV sort of thing, like if you could cut away to Joe Flaherty and show him with a puzzled look on his face afterwards.

Ah yes, a target worthy of spoofing. Very nicely done. I took my shot at it a couple years ago for CC 74 (make a comic in the style of another stripper here or elsewhere) back in the dark ages when there was no duck character:

Mudhen Van Buren by kaufman 10-19-01

The United States has the BEST armed forces in the entire world. You know why? Because we don't have LIBERALS and GAYS serving their country, only good red-blooded Americans I never thought I'd say this, but we should all thank HILLARY CLINTON for not enlisting.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Politics=me not get joke.

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Poop.

Well, the politics are bizarrely flimsy, and there really isn't any humour in the strips - it's like a "what if Rush Limbaugh didn't receive his talking points memos and had to make shit up on his own using only a half-page of a soggy old newspaper for a week's worth of research material?" scenario, only with a duck.

Mallard Fillmore (6) by speedboat_lou 7-27-03

*Tom DeLay, New York Times, July 25, 2003 Palestine would be a "sovereign state of terrorists"* - I don't see any of you HOLLYWOOD LIBERALS raising a fuss. That's another reason you're just like the FRENCH, whom we beat in WORLD WAR II. Y-y-your words are DESTROYING my WORLD of ASSUMPTIONS, , b-b-but WHAT are you TALKING about? YOU'RE the big shot with the college degree - YOU tell ME.

I love the dialogue - I can almost hear the voices of the scared guy on the left and the dethpicable Mallard Filmore.

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Please replace the handset, and try again.

Speedboat, you have broken the Fillmore barrier by actually making me laugh at Mallard Fillmore, although i guess the real comic didn't make me laugh, just the parody. Cheers.

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.