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| ...that's when Hideki Matsui, being the hero he is, swooped in with his big bat! | |
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| And, rescued the victims of that horrific twenty-five car pile up? | |
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| Nope. He actually bashed all their heads in with his big bat! | |
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| Whaaaaaaaaaat?So, how's he a HERO? | |
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| Did you not see what he did in game six of the World Series? HELLOOOOOOO!! | |
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| Proving once again America has its priorities straight when it comes to professional athletes! | |
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