All comics by SullivanGreer

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by SullivanGreer
2-21-03
Hey, what's up.
Not much.
Shit. I forgot this guys name.
That's wierd how he's a shark... and how he's not in water.
See you later.
Take it easy.

 

by SullivanGreer
2-21-03
Ha ha. Earth. What a big load of ass.
We should go down there and just kick everyone's face in.
I agree, that would be awesome.
Most awesome.
We're the best aliens EVER.

 

by SullivanGreer
2-21-03
Being a robot rules.
I disagree. Being a robot has its perks, but I would rather be something more badass. I can't even shoot lasers out of my eyes.
That sucks hardcore.
I wish I had never been built!

 

by SullivanGreer
2-21-03
HEAVEN...
Yo. I'm God. Bow down to my awesome power.
Wow! I got into heaven, I can't believe it!
Ahem. Bow down to my awesome power.
Heaven blows.

 

by SullivanGreer
2-21-03
MORGAN AND ALEC HAVE A TALK.
Alec, what is the meaning of life?
I feel like we're so separated... so far away from each other.
Yeah, like there is strange void that prevents me from truly commnicating with you.
Totally.
... what about the meaning of life?
*crunch*

 

by SullivanGreer
2-21-03
This is the life huh? Just two sound effects, hangin out at a wall.
You said it.
All we need now is some work.
I hear they're making XXXX.
Is Vin Deisel going to direct?
Keep your smoke billows crossed.

 

by SullivanGreer
2-21-03
I better do something stupid quick.

 

by SullivanGreer
2-21-03
This doesn't feel right.
Don't worry honey. Just pretend that we're the same species.
Except you're a fucking tentacle.
*lick*

 

by SullivanGreer
2-21-03
Heh, is this thing on?
heh...heh
No, no seriously. I don't know if it's on or not.

 

by SullivanGreer
2-21-03
At the home of multi-millionaire Martin Bates...
Master Bates?
*khmghgh*
Yes?
That joke never gets old.

 

by SullivanGreer
2-21-03
Being a kid sucks...
I'm a kid!

 

by SullivanGreer
2-21-03
A scene from "Jersey Girl"...
Hey J. Lo, I think i'm falling in love with you, even though I know you are a lesbian.
Where's Ben?
He's off filming DareDevil 2: Double Dare.
snoochie boochies?
Where are the cameras?

 

by SullivanGreer
2-21-03
To tell you the truth, I sort of expected the apocalypse to be way cooler than this.
I know what you mean. Sorta takes the coolness out of being a fucked-up bug.
Yeah. There should definatly be more huge piles of skulls.
You mean like in the new T3 trailer?
Ha ha ha. "JAWN CAWNAH!" Ha ha.
James Cameron, why have you forsaken us?

 

by SullivanGreer
2-21-03
Checkmate.

 

by SullivanGreer
2-22-03
Here, my son, is where time turns into space...

 

by SullivanGreer
2-22-03
Jim Jarmusch does comics:
Where are we going?

 

by SullivanGreer
2-22-03
Welcome to Hampshire
GOD I CRAVE A CHILDS SWEET TOUCH
what do i have to do? i thought i had that one in the bag!
I made this kid?

 

by SullivanGreer
2-22-03
gosh shes beautiful - what can i say to her?
hi - you would make a beautiful man
where is your nose?
9th times the charm?
looks like suicide again for me...

 

by SullivanGreer
2-22-03
This planet's life-forms are primitive!
Stop acting like an idiot, Loius.
This comic represents the peak of my comic career.
Earth is so surreal.

 

by SullivanGreer
2-22-03

 

by SullivanGreer
2-22-03
S
Please Sir....
WHAT?
I
......
SLUT!
P
Skip the bill, blow up the waitress, and sneak into the back of the theatre and tell me a story.
ok........

 

by SullivanGreer
2-25-03
Excuse me? Are you Matthew A. Wasserman?
Obviously I am; I am not hurt by this awesome explosion.
God I'd love to get in those pants.
I love you.
Why have I been so nice recently?

 

by SullivanGreer
2-25-03
What was that? Is that a fucking ghost??
I don't know, let's get outta here!!
That's right, I'm Claudius, and this is my fucking main hall. I rule Denmark now!! Everyone loves me!! PARTY!!
I do not love you... because I am Hamlet, and you are my evil uncle who took over for my daddy when he died!
OH NO!! That is my daddy!! I thought he was dead!
Your uncle Claudius killed me... so kill him!! IT'S FUCKIN SIMPLE!

 

by SullivanGreer
2-25-03
Yo Polonius!! You gotta help me! Hamlet has gone CRAZY!!
Crazy with love? DAMN OPHELIA!! We gotta tell Claudius!
ROSENCRANTZ AND GUILDENSTERN ARE AWESOME!!
Hamlet, we have some players coming here to put on a show, how does that sound?
SHITTY! No wait, maybe that's good... SHUT UP POLONIUS! You suck alsmost as bad as my uncle... who I'm gonna kill.

 

by SullivanGreer
2-25-03
Hey, what's goin' on Hamlet?
WHAT?? FUCK YOU OPHELIA!! YOU BLOW!! AND YOU'RE A WHORE. AND I NEVER LOVED YOU. AND YOU'RE A WHORE.
Damn Horatio, why do you rule so much? You are my only friend.
Yes. I am your friend to the end. (Because we both are hip-looking.)
Sorry Polonius, I didn't see you there.
FU!

 

by SullivanGreer
2-25-03
WHAT?? POLONIUS IS DEAD!! I'M SO FUCKING MAD! HAMLET, YOU ARE SO EXILED!!
W'eva. I don't even care.
Yo, I am Fortinbras, and me and my badass army are about to fuck some serious shit up with this here axe.
WHAT?? NOW HAMLET IS COMING BACK??
I'm so confused at this point.

 

by SullivanGreer
2-25-03
Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio: a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy: he hath borne me on his back a thousand times; and now, how abhorred in my imagination it is!
THE END.

 

by SullivanGreer
3-01-03
Hey Kregg, what's going on?
Holy fucking ghost. Is that bird talking to me?
You should come back to my place. We could wrestle in raspberry jam, and then play with my lizard, if you catch my drift.
THIS IS WHAT I GET FOR MAKING SO MANY FUNNY COMICS!!
Let's discuss this comic real quick. Kregg is a matador, which represents his tendency to kill bulls. And the birds lets the reader know that we are, in fact, inside Kregg's unconscious thought.
I agree, but what about the ambulances? ... You think they represent ambulances? No I guess not. Overall, this comic gets a D-

 

by SullivanGreer
3-02-03
Why can't I get girls?
You're asking the wrong cat.
Do you think it's my lack of social skills?
Either that or your lack of a lower body.
Ha ha. We are so little.

 

by SullivanGreer
3-02-03
FIRST DATE!!
Sorta makes you think about God. I mean, could something as beautiful as this merely be coincidence, and the fact that we can comprehend that beauty seems so supernatural.
What beauty?
This sunset.
This is supposed to be a fuckin sunset?
Oh comic world, why must I conform to your limits?

 

by SullivanGreer
3-04-03
Man, I'm tired of being a duck.
Nothing you can really do about it though.
I could try to change into a different animal.
Like a duck?
Yeah.

 

by SullivanGreer
3-04-03
FEED ME SEYMOUR!
I wonder if it knows it's a TV.

 

by SullivanGreer
3-04-03

 

by SullivanGreer
3-04-03
Ok, I've been hangin around for a while, I figure I should tell you a little about myself.
First off, I'm a duck.
I like key lime pie and square dancing.
I wouldn't really call myself high maintenance...
...how the fuck do you spell maintenance anyway? I mean, is that right?
I forgot what my original joke idea was.

 

by SullivanGreer
3-04-03
ME AND DAN FINALLY MEET:
Hey... I've, uh, admired your comics for a while now.
Oh yeah, me too man, definately.
I like the whole, uh, "chicken motif" you got goin' on... and stuff.
Oh thanks man, you too. I mean, you got this whole... "animal thing," you know, it's really great, I love it.
Wanna go read Will's comics?
I thought you'd never ask.

 

by SullivanGreer
3-04-03
Yes! Ducks can totally swim. I knew there was something to be said for being a duck.
Is there seriously someone out there consciously creating this comic? I don't understand.

 

by SullivanGreer
3-10-03
QUEUED?
All I wanted was some new music to make me happy.
Oh man, life sucks. Everything is always queued.

 

by SullivanGreer
3-24-03
Ah, the first warm day in six months.
Yeah. The suburbs are nice, but I miss the city.
Man, our legs must be really long for us to be this high.
Yeah the city is great, but I miss the rocks.
Nothin' wrong with the rocks.
Chill.

 

by SullivanGreer
3-25-03
Night is so weird. It kinds reminds me of day. You know, weird and all.
That's the whole comic? Yes, it is.

 

by SullivanGreer
4-26-03
Holy crap, new backgrounds, huh?
Yeah, it would seem that we're on a ship.
A love ship.

 

by SullivanGreer
4-27-03
Welcome to Seafood Planet, can I take your "shore"-der?
Uh, one sea cucumber. To go.
You got it!
There you are sir. Would you like to see our "lake"-out menu?
No.

 

by SullivanGreer
9-01-03
Well, I'm back on the comic circuit. Got some new joke ideas. You wanna hear them?
You've been stayin' up nights huh?
Haven't had much else to do.
When's the last time you got laid?
This got embarrassing fast.
Wanna lick this banana?

 

by SullivanGreer
1-04-04
So how are you going to comment on your return to making comics this time?
Comment on the new character options? Go postmodern and break the 4th wall? Comment on how weird girls are?
Or just good old-fashioned metamorphosis?
KRILLIN!!

 

by SullivanGreer
1-04-04
Alright, so if you see Mario, go after him full force. But if turns around, disappear.
Why?
'Cause you're an idiot, that's why.

 

by SullivanGreer
1-04-04
Our top story tonight: The world is running out of jokes.

 

by SullivanGreer
1-10-04
We both knew it would come to this.
Aliens and men can never be friends.
Not as long as aliens look like fucking watermelons.
Move closer, John Woo is casting his next movie.

 

by SullivanGreer
1-10-04
God i need some help making new comics.
Are you my fairy JOKEmother?
Wow.

 

by SullivanGreer
1-10-04
Pretty sweet party huh?
Shit, I walked into the baby room.

 

by SullivanGreer
1-10-04
On the next episode of Extreme Ghostbusters...

 

by SullivanGreer
2-16-04
The last comic was made by Tim. Plus all the jokes were way beyond you. I'm not making any excuses or anything, I just had to fucking explain. Plus I was on drugs when I wrote it. Plus I was Tim.

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