All comics by banger

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by banger
8-12-02
Do me a favor. If I ever tell you I want to be good friends with a certain MidiMaster again, smack me in the nuts.
I thought it would be great fun again, but things are craptastic again and has turned into 'I AM BETTER THEN YOU BECAUSE OF THIS' blahblahblah shitfold. 'YOU NEED TO CHANGE YOUR WAYS' blahblahblah.
It's more stressful then it is fun, and I'm currently on the verge of crying (forever).
I enjoy how you make things difficult for yourself, stick to staying home and reading books.

 

by banger
8-24-02
Since we're going back to school on Monday, I won't be able to watch The Daily Show at 11:00 PM.
And I won't be able to make pretzels and flirt with the women (but fail).
Gosh, school is one giant downer. Thank goodness for skipping school and Labor Day.
God, I hate myself too.

 

by banger
9-17-02
*JUMPING* HEY LOOK I AM CHELSEA!
WHO WANTS MONEY? TICTACS *SHAKESHAKE*
My mannerisms are so obvious, it makes me cry a lot.
SMILEYSMILEYZ.

 

by banger
10-25-02
I'd be wonderful if you transfered out of state.

 

by banger
10-25-02
Someday, we're going to rule the Broadway stage.
I don't know, I doubt anyone will want to watch Robots Lord Of The Rings Faith No More Hats Hats Hats Super Show.
You forgot the buttons part. Everyone LOVES buttons!
People also love gratuitous sex.

 

by banger
10-25-02
I don't care what anyone says. I consider us two of the funniest people ever.
I mean, come on. Who else talks about Michael Jackson and Casio keyboard sex on a regular basis?
We're like a living, breathing Seinfeld episode. A really, really bad one.

 

by banger
10-27-02
OH JOY. A DEER.
Fhwgwads.
WHAT'S THAT SUCCULENT FELLOW? YOU WANT ME TO RAM A PEPSI BLUE BOTTLE INTO YOUR ANAL CAVITY? EXCELLENT.
Jippity.
IT'S AS THOUGH WE'VE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES. BUT I STILL DON'T LIKE YOU.
Uber.

 

by banger
10-27-02
I want to love you!
PYB!
Pretty Young Blaine!

 

by banger
10-27-02
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR MC MAN. HAPPY BIRTHDAY. TO YOU.
I really, really, really hate Banger.

 

by banger
10-28-02
SO THEN I TOOK IT
AND I JUST FUCKING SMASHED IT IN MY HEAD
You make me smile. What's your name?

 

by banger
10-28-02
You are much bigger then me. SO I FIGHT YOU.
Whoa there little lady. Show me some love first.
Now, will this fighting be with a club?

 

by banger
10-28-02
So.. I notice that you have the new Godzilla game for the Gamecube here.
Yeah.
Wishing I was dead when talking to neat boys isn't a good sign.

 

by banger
10-29-02
Dear Mister Green: Your test results are in, and you have syphillis. Your penis will rot.
Neat.

 

by banger
10-29-02
PLEASE REMEMBER I CALL YOU LIKE, TWICE EVERY TWO MONTHS.
PLEASE.
I HATE YOU AND YOUR NONEXISTANT MONEYFLOW AND APATHETIC NATURE. PLZ DRIVE THROUGH.

 

by banger
10-29-02
For serious, what's the deal with the douche?
No idea.
Do you squirt it in your love spot and then stand over a bowl while it seeps out of you? Or do you let your uterus absorb the chemicals?
That's an interesting theory.
Then when you open up your legs, a pleasant fragrance floats out and you have a tropical party in your pants (literally)?
I wouldn't look into it too much.

 

by banger
10-30-02
I love you.

 

by banger
11-09-02
I've spent the whole afternoon and evening downloading songs from The Powerpuff GIrls movie and shows.
I think I've hit a whole new low. Or possibly high, considering I've done much worse.
What could be worse?
I guess you weren't around for my Monster Mash Hamtaro Theme Song Dogs Singing Tina Turner extravaganza.
Jesus.

 

by banger
1-04-03
I enjoy the fact that my Christmas tree is still up, as hopefully it will bring reversed bad luck.
Good luck?
Yeah yeah, but anyways I found a Duran Duran album today.
I hope you're not trying to impress me.
Never.
Yeah, I didn't really think so.

 

by banger
4-17-03
I refuse to participate in your plan.
You should stop cowering under the shadow of your mother. Stand up to her. Skip school. Bookstore.
It will be the best experience you've ever had skipping a school function.
The point is that I am not cool enough to do anything remotely like that. I will simply sit in the corner of the studyhall and read.
That is so weak. So weak.

 

by banger
6-11-03
Sylvia Plath is such a horrible writer.
OH LOOK AT ME I AM SYLVIA PLATH BLAHBLAHBLAH.
LOOK! I AM SYLVIA PLATH! HAVE MY OVEN BABIES!

 

by banger
12-17-04
Sad Robot, why are you so sad?
I am sad over the fact that instead of being in a Duran Duran cover band, I am talking to you.
SPACEMAN REALIZES THE PROBLEM.
Oh.

Showing page 3.

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