All comics by Bargaintuan

Profile

 

by Bargaintuan
4-09-03
You make kitty scared.
ALL HAIL THE SACRED KITTY!
You suck.

 

by Bargaintuan
4-10-03
Dude! I just met Brittney Spears at the mall!
Yeah, right! And Saddam's living in my basement!
DAMN YOU, U.S. INTELLIGENCE!!!

 

by Bargaintuan
4-10-03
Type! Les Etats-Unis sucent!
Ouais! La France devrait être la seule superpuissance du monde!
Damnez-le! Je devrais avoir maintenu ma grande bouche fermée!

 

by Bargaintuan
4-10-03

 

by Bargaintuan
4-12-03
HELLO?!?

 

by Bargaintuan
4-12-03
Feeling generous after making a fortune on StripCreator, Brad finally decides to spring for fifth fingers for the forum users...
F@^k this. I'm going back to the pub!

 

by Bargaintuan
4-13-03
Welcome to the World Telepath Federation! We take you right now to "The Mind Slayer" Mark Mentad, who's in the ring making a statement...
BRIAN BRANIAC, WHEN I GET YOU IN THIS RING, I'M GONNA RIP YOUR CONCIOUSNESS APART AND LEAVE YOU A DROOLING VEGETABLE!
Uh oh! Here comes Brian Brainiac... and he's thinking about a TABLE!
All right! Harcore!

 

by Bargaintuan
4-13-03
I just foun' out that I can no longer pronounce the letter 'ee.
The letter E?
No, the one before that. I ha' one friggin' line in the last comic, and I blew it!
Ah. You should go see a 'octor.
'On't mock me.
I'm not. You must be contagious.

 

by Bargaintuan
4-13-03
I'M SPARTICUS!
I'M SPARTICUS!
I'M SPARTICUS!

 

by Bargaintuan
4-15-03
You know, I used to be a member of Mensa.
Why did you quit?
I didn't.
Then what ha--
Never mind.

 

by Bargaintuan
4-15-03
I just wrote "Excepts" instead of "Excerpts" in the title of my last comic.
Maybe it has something to do with the fact that you're hammering a nail into your head.
Nah. That can't be it.

 

by Bargaintuan
4-17-03
See, Todd! I told you! Oscar the Grouch would have to be a midget!
Yeah, whatever. You're still wrong about Bert and Ernie, though... You just have to be.

 

by Bargaintuan
4-19-03
Hmmm... I wonder if I got any E-mail today...
yo wuzz up i was just checkin around right then i like popped by u;r page then man i wann no where u got those happy face ppl cuz man they r so fucki crazy man the allways cheer me up
so could like hook me up wit that man thanks if yea can n if yea can't then it's all good right k peace out man.
YIKES!!!

 

by Bargaintuan
4-20-03
Based on the comic "Snow Men ain't gods" by TheBearButt.
Bow to me, for I am the one true, ever-living God!
Uh, yeah. Right.
You have angered me! I shall smite you!
Take your best shot, Frosty.
Later that day...
....so then, he started hurling balls of himself at me. I just walked away after that.
Yeah, whatever. LESS TALK! MORE VIRGINS!

 

by Bargaintuan
4-21-03
I'm an innocent man, I tell ya!
Yes, Mr. Peterson. That's why I'm here to represent you.
I didn't kill anyone!
I know, Mr. -- Wait, didn't you have brown hair when I came in?
How could anyone think I could kill my own wife and child?!
STOP THAT!!!

 

by Bargaintuan
4-22-03
KAJUN GETS DRUNK. Stumble back two spaces.
KAJUN GETS DRUNK. Stumble back two spaces.
KAJUN GETS DRUNK. Stumble back two spaces.

 

by Bargaintuan
4-22-03
Wow! Isn't this great? Just a month ago, you couldn't even walk in here.
Thanks for the freedom. Now leave us alone.
Mind you, it's been looted to the bare walls, but at least Saddam's gone.
Thanks for the freedom. Now leave us alone.
Did you stomp on the toppled statue outside? That sure looks like fun!
THANKS FOR THE FREEDOM! NOW LEAVE US ALONE!!!

 

by Bargaintuan
4-22-03
Let's see... I'd like two burgers, medium fri-- WOAH! You're a monkey!
That's so cool! They must have trained chimps to work the register!
Sorry about that, sir. Someone must have left the freezer door open again.
!

 

by Bargaintuan
4-22-03
Wow! That was better than Robots of the Caribbean! I'm definitely going on that again!
OK. I'll meet you at the Hall of Pentiums.

 

by Bargaintuan
4-24-03
I'm sorry, but the test came back positive. You have Lou Gehrig's Disease.
Well, can I return it to him?

 

by Bargaintuan
4-24-03
I'm sorry, but the test came back positive. You have Lou Gehrig's Disease.
Is it autographed?

 

by Bargaintuan
4-25-03
I'm sick of this work detail!
Me, too!
Psst! There's gonna be a jailbreak at midnight tonight. Pass it on.
There's gonna be a jailbreak at midnight tonight...

 

by Bargaintuan
4-25-03
I went to a water park today. What did you do?
I just stayed home and watched porn.
It was great! I got soaking wet!
So did I.

 

by Bargaintuan
4-27-03
As soon, as I said "sex", he was all over me.
And this is when you told him to stop?
No. Then I dropped my pants and screamed, "I WANT YOU INSIDE ME!"
Excuse me, but how does this constitute rape?
He left without paying.

 

by Bargaintuan
4-28-03
Oh, God! What is that awful smell?
I am Malodorous, the God of All That Is Foul-smelling!
How'd you get that job?
My armpits are very close to my ass.

 

by Bargaintuan
4-29-03
KILL ALL HUMANS! KILL ALL HUMANS!
Oh, my! It's a nice sunny day today!
That's better.

 

by Bargaintuan
5-02-03
Today an Iraqi protest became violent, leaving six Iraqis dead. Coalition forces maintain that they were fired upon.
In other news, three new SARS cases have appeared in Toronto. One man is dead and the other two are in critical condition.
Any moment now, we are expecting a press briefing on the latest Palestinian suicide attack. We will go to it live once it starts.
Damn, I miss Enron.

 

by Bargaintuan
5-09-03
Hey! What's your favorite TV show?
HEE HAW!

 

by Bargaintuan
5-11-03
Monday
Today's topic: can Scott Peterson get a fair trial?
Tuesday
Today's topic: can Scott Peterson get a fair trial?
Wednesday
Today's topic: can Scott Peterson get a fair trial?

 

by Bargaintuan
5-17-03
I'm posessed.
Don't be like that.
OK.

 

by Bargaintuan
5-17-03
Whoa, dude! I'm a robot!
Sweet! I'm a robot, too!
Wanna cyber?

 

by Bargaintuan
5-20-03
So Neo, now you're "the One," the messiah of the human resistance. How is that working for you?
It's kinda boring, actually.

 

by Bargaintuan
5-20-03
I'm going to count to three, and when I reach three you will awaken, feeling fully awake and refreshed. One... Two...
Three.
So, what were my past lives like? Was I a soldier? A healer? A statesman? Tell me! I've got to know!
Nobody cool. Sorry.

 

by Bargaintuan
5-21-03
How you been doin', bro'?
Not too well. I've got a nasty case of diarrhea.
Um...
My ass burns more than a Nazi furnace.
Please stop.
Yes, sir. It runs more than Forrest Gump.

 

by Bargaintuan
5-24-03
ô WE BUILT THIS CITY! ô
ô WE BUILT THIS CITY ON ROCK AND ROLL!!! ô
Uh... have you looked outside lately?
Rock and Roll sucks for building cities on.

 

by Bargaintuan
5-25-03
So you think you might be gay... Do you like showtunes?
No... unless you count songs from Disney movies.
Do you prance around in tight leather pants?
Um, not leather, no.
Finally, do you enjoy having rough anal sex with other men?
AND HOW!

 

by Bargaintuan
5-26-03
Ah! Another fine day patroling my fair city for arch-criminals!
Wait a second! My Danger Sense is tingling! Someone must be in trouble! I'd better leap into action!
Oh, wait. Never mind. I'm just horny.

 

by Bargaintuan
5-27-03
Afghanistan
Iraq
The Dixie Chicks

 

by Bargaintuan
5-30-03
This painting sucks.
It's not a painting. It's an Einstein-Rosen-Podolsky Bridge -- a portal into another universe parallel to our own.
Well, it still sucks.

 

by Bargaintuan
5-31-03
Id's finally released ULTIMATE DOOM!!! And it's ONLINE!!!
JESUS H. CHRIST! THIS IS SO LEET! I'M GONNA PLAY THIS FOREVER!!!
Two weeks later, civilization collapses.

 

by Bargaintuan
5-31-03
So then he tells me, "No one can be told what the Matrix is. You have to experience it for yourself."
I mean, this guy was really creeping me out!
That's when I decided I was taking the blue pill.
A-ha! I knew this story would involve drug use sooner or later!

 

by Bargaintuan
6-02-03
Procrastination doesn't really work when it comes to writing comics on Stripcreator.
Why not?

 

by Bargaintuan
6-02-03
Ready for your examination? Remove your clothing, please.
Do what?
Don't worry, I am a doctor.
Oh, OK.
Oh, boy! I get to see boobies!

 

by Bargaintuan
6-02-03
I examined this really hot chick today.
Really?
Yeah, she was a redhead -- natural, if you know what I mean.
Woah! That sounds totally triumphant, my most excellent friend.
Now, let me tell you about little Timmy...

 

by Bargaintuan
6-05-03
OOH! WEER GUNNA BEE IN A MOOVY!
KOUL! I GIT TOO BEE BUBKAT GOALDTHWAYT!
HMMMM....
I really do apologize for this.
WY DOO YOO GIT TOO BEE BUBKAT GOALDTHWAYT?
BEECUZ YOR TEH FREEGIN' HOARSE!

 

by Bargaintuan
6-06-03
Woah! I have to get to the top of this building and save my precious Pauline!
Who the hell are you?
Donkey Kong had jury duty, so the union sent me.
Look, I can't carry you and climb ladders at the same time. So, would you mind climbing up to the next level yourself? That'd be a big help. Thanks.

 

by Bargaintuan
6-07-03
Wow! I finally got Linux installed and working! Now what should I do?
Let's try "ls"... Hmmm...
"ls -a"...

 

by Bargaintuan
6-07-03
Hey Granny, need help crossing the street?
Walk right this way...
Now where the hell is that stroke victim we were called to?

 

by Bargaintuan
6-07-03
Ooh! Bargaintuan hasn't used Goats art in a long time!
I wonder what he'll do with it.
Wait. Where'd the snowman come from?
Maybe he was behind the chicken.
This is making no sense whatsoever.
I think it's funny -- kind of.

 

by Bargaintuan
6-07-03

Showing page 4.

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