All comics by Chuckaduck

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by Chuckaduck
7-27-05
Slightly Drunken Chucky kept getting buzzed them fucking with folks...
So it's absolutely out of the question of me knocking those fuggly teeth out and taking you home?
The satan-spawn W continued to invade other countries under false pretenses and rising gas prices...
YEEEEEHAW!!!
Vinni Alfredo was just never the same after that encounter with Chuck's son Mateo...
g....ga............pft.....

 

by Chuckaduck
7-27-05
MattMan continued to kickass in World of Warcraft as Apothecary...
Yup.
Richdawg continued to be a floating wad of splooge...
Cordless phone! Cordless phone!
Your average Bush supporter went on wandering the Forest of Blind Ignorance...
Our president is such an honorable man.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-27-05
Teenage Chuck went on to become a insulting smartass...
Word.
Word.
Good News Bob kept getting good news every day...
No really! At four-hundred he's stopping with the series...
And your typical Catholic priest went on, um, raping boys?...
But I still don't understand what the KY Jelly has to do with the body of 'Good God Almighty!'...

 

by Chuckaduck
7-27-05
The Pubotic Nesticle lived on as a Chicken-fucking manboy, never to know the touch of a woman...
I sense danger.
Um,num, hehe.
Ayesha Danawala stopped being a slut, learned a job skill, and became... ......aw, who am I kidding, she's sucking my dick right now...
Hgk *slob, slob, slob* *sluuuurp*, hgl, *slob,slob,slob*, grg....
AHAHAHAHAHA!
And 8 Year Old Chucky continued to fuck with his teacher, the Nice Lady...
...and THAT's how Condoleezza Rice is a bigger cocksucker than Jenna Jameson.
Did he have to use visual diagrams?

 

by Chuckaduck
7-27-05
Married Autobot Chuck went home and had sex with his wife...
Grr...
Ay Papi...venga a mí...
Chester lived happily as a horny pile of upskirt-peeping pervert...
*thwp* *thwp* *thwp* *thwp*
Meanwhile those two goats at Chester's place received a much needed break...
It's nice not to have some dude's dick up your ass.
And how.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-27-05
Database error. Wuh oh.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-27-05
Databas error...
AHA! All your database are belong to us!
...Wuh oh.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-27-05
Farmer Chuck continued to get high, have no responsibilities, watch latina porn and sing old Metallica and Afroman songs...
Everything is gonna be alright, SELL YOUR DOPE, make your money every night...
I'm not really sure who these two are or how they're related to The Inner Struggle series in any way...
Don't mind the camera.
Are you sure this won't hurt?
And that weird weed-smoking bisexualesque, necrophiliac-rapist guy just kind of went on doing his "thing"...
Okay, I know what this LOOKS like but if you'll drop your billy club, turn, and bend over I'll be happy to show you what's the dilly...

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
And that would just about wrap it up folks. It's been fun doing this series and thank you to those that were into it.
I just want to apologize to everyone that may have been insulted by our content though.
Yeah, you do that. They can kiss my ass. If you'll excuse me there a soft skinned body by the name of Emma waiting for some lovin'.
You left her waiting in the parking garage?
Nah, she's still propped up on the tombstone by the hole.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
Thanks to all who stayed with me through my inner struggle. It was a weird ride and thankfully we get to go out with dignity. Shut the lights off, and let's end this on a good note please.
I make butt jiggle in thong!
________________~FIN~______________
*Sigh* Whatever.
Lights off. Robo nerd want luvluv from sweet meats between powpow hips? Me good for luvins.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
So then he says, haha, then he says "You'll never get your pants dry in time!". Hahaha.
*Ahem* Cause you know, his wife would be home soon...
Please just stop talking to me.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
So what do you think of the City Aquarium son?
It's really cool!
Mommy? Why do they put that rockstuff on the people's feet?
So they'll stay underwater sweety. Keep watching, in a few minutes he'll stop struggling and sway back and forth like the plants.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
It was Monday morning...
...she had just gotten ready for work and was about to leave...
...little did she know she'd be hearing "What bug crawled up your ass?!" multiple times that day...

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
You have lovely hardware finishes on your website. I like the draperies too. Could you describe the color Verdi?
It's green.
I see. And what about the color Merlot?
It's a merlot color.
And what about the black?
http://img152.imageshack.us/img152/6333/job1tw.gif

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
John...
Marsha...
John...
Marsha... ...oops, you go first.
Okay. John's the guy I've been fucking for the past month and a half. Sorry about leaving the used condom on your pillow.
Oh, I was going to say Marsha's filed a suit against me for statutory rape. I mean come on, a suit against her own father!

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
You never EAT anything. How can you POSSIBLY vomit THAT much?
*sounds of hurling*
I mean come on, you barely took a fourth of that SoCo bottle. And then you had to on, and on, and on about that abortion you once had...
Ugh. Aren't you going to hold my hair back or something?
Nah, you're younger sister's still goin' strong. I think I'll go tag that.
*vomitous noises accompanied with crying*

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
Oh god Tronic Unit 7, how can I go on with my husband dead?!
INQUIRY DOES NOT COMPUTE.
Perhaps your artificial sentience can evolve into true human-like emotional attachment and you could love me someday?
NEGATIVE. PROBABILITY OF SCENARIO AT ZERO PERCENT.
Oh god, what am I thinking?! I'm so stupid! *Sob, sob, sob*
HUMAN ORGANISM IS LEAKING. WILL APPLY SAUTERING IRON MOMENTARILY.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
When SexyMother texted my online bio at the dating service with a steamy message I was ready.
I thought it hot she wanted to meet right away for some anal action. Funny thing, she lived in my old hometown.
And when I walked through the front door, there she'd been. Nothing on but a wet tank top, and she was spread eagle and tooootally ready...
Mom?

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
The life of a deer is so simple, isn't it?
Why yes. Simple and simply delightful.
It's so utterly wonderous being an intricate part of God's creation.
The cycle of it all, so, so beautiful.
You take the one on the right. Are you ready?
Lubed up before ever putting my pants on.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
You see that, right Santa?
Santa? You SEE that, right?
Shh. Don't talk right now.
Why isn't he stopping that elf orgy?

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
You know hon. Maybe we could just order in tonight. No reason to head out somewhere with long lines, pricy menus, etc. We could start a nice little fire and cuddle up.
You forgot to drop the hooker off again before coming home, didn't you Frank.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
So, Amy right? Thanks for letting me take you to lunch.
Fuck this bitch strait to fucking hell! Thinks she can just buy me off with fucking lunch n'shit!
I wanted to talk to you about me and your father cause I know how children can be edgy with new people dating their single parents.
What possible common ground could this bitch have with me?
The thing is, I'm blowing your father for cash on a daily basis.
Whoa. Talk about coincidences...

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
I HATE YOU! YOU'RE A WORTHLESS BAG OF SLIME LEADING A LIFE HE DOESN'T DESERVE! I HOPE YOU DIE!
Got his wallet.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-28-05
You know what? Just get out. We take enough shit from animal rights activists to keep your ungrateful ass around anyway. Just leave.
Fine! I'll do that! I'll leave! Then I won't be here! Let's see how you like that shit! I need this place like I need a giant pencil up my squirrelly ass!!

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
Dear Max, I hope you're doing well in Nevada. I'm sure the conference is going great for you. I just wanted to let you know how much I adore and miss you.
Just thinking about you is too much sometimes. I miss us. The way you'd walk up to me on all fours, slowly lick my toes as you massaged my feet, gently working your way to my inner thigh...
...Jake, knock it off, I'm writing a letter to my husband..
Why would she write that?

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
So, tell me more about your lovelife Tobor. Not just the cornholing, I mean the real relationships.
TOBOR ONLY IN LOVE ONE TIME. THREE YEARS AGO.
Really? Just once?
YES. TOBOR THOUGHT IT WAS JUST ANOTHER CORNHOLING, THEN SHE SAY THOSE THREE BEAUTIFUL WORDS...
Three years ago...
....you're.... ...killing... ..me........

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
Why did the whore suck a dick?
To try and earn a little money to live shamefully on for the following hour while wallowing in pity over her sad existence.
HAHAHAHA! I love that joke!
Haha! I'm a slut!

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
Your resteraunt is fucking filthy. I can't even eat my food. This place is infested!
Sir, I assure you this place is not infested. At worst the floor could stand to be mopped. Our facilities are very cleanly.
*Sigh* Sorry, didn't mean to blow up like that. Bad day. I'll got sit back down. Again I'm sorry.
He's gone.
Think I can climb into his burger without him knowing?

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
Is that a plane off in the distance?
I love Discover magazine! Look at this...
No, now it's too big for that. Maybe it's the moon? What's with the sudden flaming?
...according to this article a giant planet-killing asteroid is on it's way through our solar system.
I think we're about to die.
Nah, don't worry. They say there's a 72% likelihood that the asteroid will pass on by.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
Paris Hilton is so hot.
Take it back.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
>kitty104: wait. u mean u REALLY wheeled your computer into a restaurant????
Yeah! This is first date I've been on in years! And I've totally been playing footsy with you under the table all night by the way.
Attn: kitty104 has signed off.
Wait!
Attn: kitty104 has deleted her account.
HEY!

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
...holy shit....it's over.......I'm.. ...in hell.
Where the fuck is everybody?
Whoa, you missed it. God came by and gave EVERYBODY a reprieve. Tough shit for you, they JUST left. So it's just you and me now.
.....goddamnit.
Yup, that's basically the premise.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
No smoking indoors ordinance.
Oh. Yes. That explains everything.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
Can I have a drink?
Um, no, sorry. You're a kid. Besides, you have to be taller than the bar to drink.
But not to suck a dick.
Touché.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
NO!!!AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!
HELP!PLEASE LET ME GO!!IT HURTS!!!
PLEASE!!!MAKE IT STOP!!LET ME GO!!
Think she can pull the nails out and get off of that tree?
Gosh I hope not.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
Marco!
I said Marco!
Bitch, I'm standing right fucking here.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
We, like, love being twins. We do everything together. Dress alike talk alike.
We, like, love being twins. We do everything together. Dress alike talk alike.
We're so perfect and petite. That's how I got to fuck a guy like Brian.
We're so perfect and petite. That's how I got to fuck a guy like Brian.
Wait...
Wait...

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
Sciurophobia, right?

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
Well, that's it. Made a snowman. But I don't feel joy at all. I'm still alone. My parents are still dead and my dog still hasn't come home. No one likes me and someone keeps stealing my toys at night.
You're whiny as shit too kid. Just, FYI.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
I'm looking for a new suit
ok what kinda style
i'm looking for a "i'm a loner and a really bad leader kinda look"
oh i got the perfect idea sir
here try on this george bush suit to my left

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
I'm looking for a new suit
ok what kinda style
i'm looking for a "i'm a loner and a really bad leader kinda look"
oh i got the perfect idea sir
let me fist you!

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
And the old man, haha, he replies, "Only if your dog's dead!". Ahahaha!
I'll be over here.

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
My fellow Americans. As we continue to wage war on 'terr' for the good of the people, we now set our sights to the country of Islamorada.
Uh, psst, Mr. President. Islamorada is a town in Florida.
Really?!
'TERR' ALERT RED!! BEGIN THE BOMBING!! THEY'RE HERE ALREADY!!

 

by Chuckaduck
7-29-05
I seek flesh for wear.
ok what kinda style
i'm desire a "i'm a dead kinda guy and my be considering devouring your brain look"
oh i got the perfect idea sir
here try on this george bush's recently killed pawn suit to my RIGHT... ...and let me fist you.

 

by Chuckaduck
8-03-05
Going to bed sweetie?
Yes.
Though I'd feel better about it if you weren't working up an erection playing pocket pool there.

 

by Chuckaduck
8-03-05
OH FUCK!
Goddamnit! You kids quit throwing fish at my house! It smells like an overworked hooker out here!

 

by Chuckaduck
8-03-05
Amar sin ser amada, Es una puñalada...
...No vuelvo a equivocarme más, nunca más...
Oh god, just once. Please, please just one time...
...Amar sin ser amada, y quedar abandonada...

 

by Chuckaduck
8-03-05
God my dreams suck ass.
OH! You meant "God" like "Oh man" or "For crying out loud".

 

by Chuckaduck
8-03-05
Why the fuck did I just do that?

Showing page 9.

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