All comics by alphageek

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by alphageek
8-08-02
I am trapped on a stark gray plane of stagnation and never-ending banality. Is this Purgatory or merely another friday night in Toledo?
Surely, thou art Fortune's Fool.
Times passes as the Cosmos spins...
Kill me, please.
I think I love you

 

by alphageek
8-08-02
So, you say that in exchange for giving me this wonderful coffee, you shall bring about the apocolype, destroying 10 million years of dinosaur art and culture?
Yes, but only a small apocolypse.
Come the Horsemen...
I hate you.
tee hee

 

by alphageek
8-08-02
Well, here I am at the Judeo-Christian Costume Party.Why, here's Bob dressed as the Holy Ghost!
Boo!I mean... feel the power fo the Lord!
Oh, here's Jim dressed as the Burning Bush.Well done, Jim!
(OUCH!)thank you(YEOUCH!)
WOW!Great Nazarine costume, Doug!
Thanks, but my hands are killing me.Could you carry me over to the Gologotha snack table?

 

by alphageek
8-08-02
The Monsters Under the Bed discuss tonight's strategy...
So let me go over your plan again. You're going to make scratching noises at the closet door, and when they get out of bed to investigate, I grab their ankles, right?
Correct.
And I'm not allowed to have sex with them?
Not again, no.

 

by alphageek
8-08-02
Beverly's tragic life is not going the way she had once hoped.
I certainly didn't expect this.
Cheer up, my child. Even Jesus ran into the unexpected hardship upon occasion.
Really?
Really.
Meanwhile, in hell...
I certainly didn't expect this.
hee...

 

by alphageek
8-08-02
One night at the Gawth Club
*angst* I am a vampire...
Oh gawd. I am so damn sick of you baby-bat poseurs pretending you vampires. It's so trite, so cliched, so stupid! Gaah!
B-but. I really AM a vampire. I can even prove it to you. *angst*
Shaw... whatever. Fine. Go prove it.
outside...
AAAARGH THE SUN! OH, HOW I BURN! LORD CAINE, I RETURN TO THE!!!
Fine, you're a vampire, but your still not Gawth unless you listen to Sisters.

 

by alphageek
8-08-02
shit.

 

by alphageek
8-08-02
bizzare set-up in a surreal setting
drug/sex/TV reference
inside joke three people will understand
attempt at wit in a post-modern underground manner
Inside joke two people will understand
pseudo-funny punchline

 

by alphageek
8-08-02
My Ten Year High School Reunion
So, Joshua. Do you still play that Dungeons & Dragons?
I sure do...
..BUT THIRD EDITION!!!
He's still a geek...
I'm still cool...

 

by alphageek
8-09-02
So this grasshopper walks into a bar...
And the bartender sez...
Hey! Y'know there's a drink named after you?
And the grasshopper replies...
Really? There's a drink named "Steve?"

 

by alphageek
8-09-02
Ohmigod, there was this guy and he was like Wheeeee... Gonads and strife. Gonads and Strife. Gonads and Strife...
It's been done already.
fuck

 

by alphageek
8-09-02
I can see my house from up here....
Damn... now my nose itches...
Y'know, now that I think about it, that whole "this is my body, this is my blood" thing was really kinda' creepy.

 

by alphageek
8-09-02
Today was cleaning day.
It took me forever to do the kitchen. It was a real mess.
In retrospect I probably shouldn't have microwaved the cat on Wednesday.

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