All comics by rooty

 

by rooty
8-09-04
Rooty is surfing the internet...
FRELLING BANTHAS! Dark Nest? Coruscant Nights? Who makes these titles?
Ring Ring! Ring Ring!
A disturbing phone call...
I'll pick up the phone.
Pay us 1,000,000 credits...or we will call Aaron Allston's trilogy ATTACK OF THE CHEESE
Rooty faces a dilemma...
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Uh...you're supposed to start on an epic quest to save Aaron Allston's post-NJO trilogy...

 

by rooty
8-09-04
The army has been hired to slow Rooty down!
But...I'm not even out of the house yet!
Arr...time to die, boy!
The ever brave Rooty makes his stand.
Nooooo! Don't kill me!
Arr...we cannot hit a poor cowering kid...can we? Arr...let me just find the Army Handbook...
The army has been decieved!
Arrr...come back boy! RUFUS THE HORSE, COME TO ME! WE'LL CHASE HIM THROUGH THE TOWN!

 

by rooty
8-09-04
Rooty is running from General Kogarmar...
Ar...we have you now!
I'll hide in this alleyway.
Rooty makes a grievous error.
It's a trap!
I have you now!
Rooty's Jedi powers give him an advantage against the weak minded troopers.
***You want to let me pass.***
I want to let you pass...

 

by rooty
8-09-04
Fans around the world discover the deadly truth...
'Attack of the Cheese'? Like, WTF?
Worst. Title. Ever.
Elsewhere...
MR. BAD...MESSAGE FROM THE ARMY...ROOTY AT FIRST ESCAPED THEM...NOW HE IS CORNERED
Hahahahaha! This Rooty has been a thorn in my foot for too long. Eliminate him.
And back to our hero, who is in a predicament...
Oh crap.
Prepare to die, fanboy punk!

 

by rooty
8-09-04
Chicanery once again prevails...
Look! An X-wing!
COOL!!!
...as we see only too well!
Where? I can't see it...
Rooty takes shelter at the nearest fanboy asylum.
It's terrible! Attack of the Cheese!
I see...yes we must do something about this.

 

by rooty
8-10-04
The fanboys come up with a plan...
Alright, Generic Fanboy #1138, go over the plan one more time.
Um...we reinact the duel from A New Hope? But with breadsticks?
"No...sigh...alright, first you create a diversion by claming to have your hands on an advance copy of Republic commando."
Woah! Look at those damn fool Geonosians die! PITY MY WRATH!
Ar...let me see that...ar...you're playing it all wrong! DON'T SHOOT THAT!
Little does Rooty know that the enigmatic Mr. Bad has bugged the asylum!
INCOMING TRANSMISSION... "Meanwhile, I'll escape through the window, while the army is too busy watching you play the game. Simple!"
Haha! Rooty you won't survive this one!

 

by rooty
8-10-04
Rooty reaches the window as his friend holds off the army...
Okay...just gotta open this thing and I'm home free...
But he's having problems!
Damn! This bugger DOESN'T open!
And once more he finds himself in a familiar position.
WE MEET AGAIN! And this time... NO TRICKS!
Damn! There goes that option!

 

by rooty
8-10-04
Rooty draws upon a mystic power to win the battle!
Force Push!!
And for once, it works! The General is pushed away!
Aaaaaarrggggg!!!
Seeing as the window won't open, Rooty takes the door instead...
OK...now I gotta get to the convention...I can head off the Star Wars booth and find out what's going on.

 

by rooty
8-10-04
At the Bi-Mon-Sci-Fi-Con...
Hey nice costume...very realistic! I thought my Hermione one was good...
?? COSTUME?? WHAT YOU SAY?? COMPUTE ERROR COMPUTE
Mr. Bad's undercover robot looks for Rooty...
WHERE IS ORGANING BEING KNOWN AND CLASSIFIED AS "ROOTY"...SENSORS SCANNING
But Rooty is incognito...as his D&D character Reck Lanis!
SCANNING...NO ROOTY...ONLY A WEIRD GEEK...
I thought they were one and the same...

 

by rooty
8-10-04
On the Astral Plane...
It has come to our attention that the human known as "Rooty" messed up with his comics.
Uh-huh!
The title of the previous episode should in fact read, "The Adventures of Rooty Volume 9" - not Volume 8.
Yeppers!
We apologise for any inconvenience this has caused, and because Rooty has other things to waste his money on than suscribing, you won't be seeing any "special edition" edits. None at all.
If you see him, SMACK HIM ONE!

 

by rooty
8-10-04
Rooty is all too late...
Damn! The Star Wars booth has been replaced with...THIS? What evil work is this?
And his outburst has attracted unwanted attention!
STAR WARS...HMMM...LOGIC PROBE WORKING...ROOTY SPOTTED!
An unexpected rescue!
***Incendio!*** Quick Rooty, follow me!

 

by rooty
8-10-04
Rooty follows Hermione outside...
Listen, Rooty, we don't have much time! We have to find where the Star Wars Booth has been moved to!
OK...but who the hell are you?
That's irrelevant. Now let's get outta this gear and move!
Right on, boss. Just I'm not changing in the middle of the frelling road.
A few minutes later...
Well, that was quick.

 

by rooty
8-10-04
Rooty and Hermione chase through the city streets looking for the missing Star Wars booth...
I sure hope we find it...I really want a Revenge of the Sith shirt...
And I thought this quest was AGAINST crappy titles...
After a hard day's searching Rooty and Hermione head for some refreshement.
Let's go into this cyber cafe and we'll see if we can find some info about the booth. And get food.
Sounds good. Especially the food part.
Rooty searches the web looking for clues...
Hmmm...all Google comes up with is porn sites and MP3 downloads...
How about that one? Oh wait, "Buy Illegal Crack".

 

by rooty
8-11-04
Rooty is still having problems in his search...
w00t! OMG I SI TEH FR4GZ0RZZ
Are you going to search for the missing booth anytime soon, or just play Doom all day?
Meanwhile, Mr. Bad has received some bad news...
NOOOOOOOOOOO!!! My robot! My only friend! *sniff*
...and deploys the FRAGMEISTER 5009!
YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS, ROOTY!

 

by rooty
8-11-04
After very little happening for the last fourteen or so episodes, it's time to advance the plot...
But first, MORE DOOM!
If you want something doing...
Hermione comes upon some interesting news...
Let's see...hmmm...Star Wars booth seen heading towards "The Bad Hill".
Doesn't quite have the same ring as "Mount Doom", but there's copyright laws for you.
OMG OMG DIE DIE TEH 1337 M4573R PWNS CH00 411!
Come along now Rooty...

 

by rooty
8-11-04
Rooty and Hermione leave the cafe...but all is not well!
SITHSPAWN!
This is not good...run!
Mr. Bad's air assault strikes home!
Look at the size of those things!
Into the garbage chute, flyboy!
What garbage chute? I can't see any garbage chute!
It's an expression...NOW MOVE!

 

by rooty
8-11-04
Rooty and Hermione hide from the bombing in a small bunker.
We're done for! There's no way we can reach the Bad Hill with this airstrike going on!
Don't be such a wuss. Besides, I have a plan!
"I'll stay here and...uh...hold them off! Meanwhile, you sneak into enemy territory..."
Remind me again why I'm doing this...
Who goes there? HALT!
"...and find a way to divert the bombs."
my master plan will not fail! OI, YOU, LOSER! YOU SUCK! AND THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT! HUH? HUH? WHAT YOU GONNA DO, BOMB ME? HUH? HINT HINT?
Ar...no, I'm just going to shoot you.

 

by rooty
8-11-04
Rooty cannot fight against the power of an E-11 blaster rifle!
AAAAAAAAAAAAARGGGGG
Set for stun! He'll be alright. Inform Mr. Bad that we have a prisoner.
In Mr. Bad's dungeon...
Uh...so what were you put in here for?
A woman dies, Children cries, I like it, love it, like the flies!
Much, much later...
AAAAARGGG... I wonder how Hermione is getting on...
Sick dreams are made of fleas, Moldy breath, and school yard cheese!

 

by rooty
8-11-04
Hermione receives an unfortunate visitor...
Who the kriff are you?
I have come from the (innacuratley represented) astral plane! I bear bad news!
Let me guess, Rooty has been captured?
Ummm....how did you know?
"This kind of gave it away."
Ar...walk prisoner! We're taking you to the prison!
I'm walking...I'm walking...

 

by rooty
8-11-04
Okay, we need to go and rescue Rooty. But because he obviously failed, the bombs are still stopping us from leaving this bunker.
Use some sense girl! Since when has this story followed continuity rules?
Outside the prison at the Bad Hill...
Hypocrites, Who Cheat to Win, The Only Sin's, Beleif in Sin!
Are you sure this is the right place?
AAAAAARG AAAARG MAKE IT STOOOOP!
That's Rooty alright.

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