Hypochondriacs by timkerr684-28-14 I have a headache Hmmm...it says my insurance is dropping me for a pre-exsisting condition Meso-Americans used to drill holes in the skull to relieve headaches Serves me right for telling my doctor about my previous life as a victim of the Black Death Maybe I need a bigger nail Now I have a headache
Todd and Lenny by timkerr684-05-16 Hey Man, you need to pitch in for rent. Oh. Uumm, how much is rent? Hold on, I'll check. Hey Dad, how much you want? I just came over to get high.
Why God Doesn't Drink by timkerr684-06-16 What do you mean I'm a mistake? Well, I drank too much last night and realize now that humans shouldn't have big fluffy ears. Thank me that I have Adam left and can use him as my human. Where is Adam anyway?
Why God Doesn't Drink. by timkerr684-09-16 Well Dad, I'm back, I did it. Did what? Were you out or something? What do you mean? You sent me to Earth to be tortured and die. I did? Wow I must have blacked out cause I don't remember that at all. Mom told me about you. Who Mary? That slut? Talk about a bad case of beer goggles.
Why God Doesn't Drink by timkerr684-16-16 God, Mrs Turtlebaum is on prayer line 3 again. Again? That woman never gives up. What does she want? Something about putting God back into the classroom again. Are you going to answer her prayers? Hell no, I hated school.
Why God Doesn't Drink by timkerr684-17-16 What's up boss, you called? Jesus Christ, not so loud! We're supposed to be enemies, remember? Oh, yea. Sorry. Anyway, I need that favor again. Hitler in the schoolgirl dress dancing at your party? No, Ronald Reagan this time. Its a business meeting.
Why God Doesn't Drink by timkerr684-18-16 Christmas morning, and the routine begins again... Hi Dad, you know what day it is? Damn, I forgot his birthday again! Did you finally get me a present this year? Ah, yea sure, sure I did. Your present is sitting on that cloud over there. Those are the leftover wine coolers from your party last night. Knock yourself out Kid!
Why God Doesn't Drink by timkerr684-19-16 Hi Phil, I think your going to have a busy day today. I'm in a foul mood. Its time for a little Wrath of God! Floods, hurricanes, tornadoes, I'm going to remind everyone down there that I'm here. You lost at cards again last night, didn't you? Who bluffs with a pair of threes? It just isn't done!