He: "Hurry up with my shirt or you'll get a poke in the ribs with this pipe."

She: "Oh yeah? Back off before I iron the wrinkles out of your SCROTUM."

Him: Hello my little sphincter-sniffer! Say didn't you used to have breasts? What did you do? Iron them away? HAHAHAHAHA

Her: Sure did stud-monkey. And the iron's still hot. Why don't you bend over and let me scorch that rat hole of yours?

Him: I thought you'd never ask!

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What did you do? Iron them away? HAHAHAHAHAHA

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"Say, Madge! Let's send Billy off to bed early and fuck like grunting, sweaty, howling animals here on this ironing board!"

"Oh, Ted! You big silly!"

- Well, dear, maybe if you kept your GODDAMNED dick out of the secretary, I wouldn't need to have a lesbian relati...shh, the kids are coming.

- How's the hash, Mr. Bogart.

- Though "Father knows Best" was a phenomenal hit, little knew of Danny Thomas's let-it-all-hang-out attitude that prompted the director to institute a quite-ingenious pre-Austin Powers film technique.

- Did you get the insurance, dear? Good, good. Now drink your strontium bits and off to work with you.

- It was the idyllic 50s lifestyle. Except for 5pm daily, when Marge would rush into the kitchen, hold her hand on the hot iron, and scream as best she could through clenched teeth, "Oh ya, that's the shit."

- HAHA! Remember that time we killed the dictionay salesman?

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- It was the idyllic 50s lifestyle. Except for 5pm daily, when Marge would rush into the kitchen, hold her hand on the hot iron, and scream as best she could through clenched teeth, "Oh ya, that's the shit."

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-"Hey baby, wanna fuck on the kitchen table?" "No Fred, now go back home before I shove this iron in your face."

He: "...and so then Manny says I oughtta use the 9-iron instead of the sand wedge, but I didn't wanna use the sand wedge 'cause I normally use an iron when I get a tough lie off the --"

She: "I didn't have a miscarriage - it was an abortion, asshole!"

He: Honey, have you seen my pipe tobacco?

She: Why yes, I believe I shoved it up your ass.

He: "What's for dinner, honey?"

She: "Repressed sexuality, acute xenophobia, superficial consumerism, denial, and meatloaf!"

Obijo and wirthling, Captain Obvious has asked me to tell you that you are funny.

"Guess what, Marge? I just read this article in a feminist publication that says that all of the trappings of this life I've provided for you are nothing but archaic symbols of repression, and that you should break free of these sexist chains, cast aspersions at my gender with impunity, and leave me and our children to find yourself as a person!"

"Ted!" *tsk* "Now how on earth am I going to finish the laundry and start dinner like THAT?"

Him: Say kitten, wanna hit?

Her: Sure Bogart. Pass it on. How do you like the Zig-Zag man decall I just put on your workshirt?

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"Guess what, Marge? I just read this article in a feminist publication that says that all of the trappings of this life I've provided for you are nothing but archaic symbols of repression, and that you should break free of these sexist chains, cast aspersions at my gender with impunity, and leave me and our children to find yourself as a person!"

"Ted!" *tsk* "Now how on earth am I going to finish the laundry and start dinner like THAT?"

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- Though "Father knows Best" was a phenomenal hit, little knew of Danny Thomas's let-it-all-hang-out attitude that prompted the director to institute a quite-ingenious pre-Austin Powers film technique.

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o O ( And these motherfuckers think I'm bent. )

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(Yeesh, but what kind of word is "gadzooks" anyway?)

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Yiddish.

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Gadzooks means, and I'm using a literal translation here, "Holy mother of pearl! That guy believes every word of the Bible! Let's get the hell out of here!"

Further proof that life is stranger than fiction, here's what I found when I looked it up on dictionary.com:

Perhaps alteration of God's hooks, the nails of the crucifixion of Christ.

So I guess it really was Yiddish. Hell, and I was just fucking around.

- "...and then I said, "Well, Elder Brown, I really don't give a flying fuck about your pamphlets!" and a shoved the iron right up his arse!"

- "Now honey, you know we can't have sex. Neither of us have genitals, remember?"

- "Okay, not imagine this iron is my vagine. See that pointy bit? The clitoris is up there, GOT IT???"

By the way, I think gadzooks is Middle English, like all those other blasphemous euphemisms of the period, like odd's fish for "God's flesh", strewth or struth for "God's truth", etc.

My apologies for my rampant typos... :P

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By the way, I think gadzooks is Middle English...

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--Nature's uncontrollable fury.

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None of your lip, mister.

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Xero slaps them out of DexX's hands. Thtop it, thilly.

What?

MORE homosexual innuendo? Dear God you people have dirty minds.

***Wow honey, that shirt looks great, how about while you cook dinner I fuck you in the ass as my special way to say 'Thanks'

***That new detergent is simply amazing, you got all the neighbors blood stains out

***Thanks for ironing my shirt, Amanda, I needed it to look good when I meet your sister at the bar.

***Him "so thats the 'special ingrediant' to starch my shirts
her "Thats right, dear, just keep fuckin the iron while its hot"

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Speaking of which, Spank, wasn't it you who had all those kick ass old school medical pictures? Back in June you were gonna make them available for download, right? Are they still?

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I don't think there is a Non Sequitur Donkey right now. As far as I know, he got deleted along with all the other forum users not matched with Strip Creator users when the systems merged.

I like cheese.

there is one, he even has a comic

i think he posted once recently

http://www.stripcreator.com/view.php?author=non-sequitur-donkey

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What's the password for the non-sequitor donkey again? I tried monkey pan, stinky wall, and blue grapefruit before running out of ideas.

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im taking the profile as a huge clue

lets see what happens

i like jam

success

however i dont know if the password for skagg is what ive entered

soon see eh?