All comics by SFH

Profile

 

by SFH
10-29-02
I LIKE POCKET POOL.
THE SOUTH WILL RISE AGAIN!
HOLY FUCK! A SOUTHERNER!
THE SOUTH WILL RISE AGAIN!
ANAL SEX?!
OK.

 

by SFH
10-29-02
OH GOD! I'M IN HORRIBLE AGONY! KILL ME, PLEASE!
WHAT KIND OF HELLISH WORLD ARE WE IN?!?!?! FUCK.
NO ONE WILL SELL ME A GUN SO I COULD END MYSELF!
I'M AN ELEPHANT, IT'S HELL IN HERE!
WHY GOD? WHYYYY?!
You look like Kirt's wang.

 

by SFH
10-29-02
Bitch, you got my money?
Yeah Benny! I got it! I swear!
Don't lie to me, ho!
Don't cut me Benny!
*STAB STAB STAB*
*DEATH RATTLE*

 

by SFH
10-29-02
Whoa! Hey, HEY! It's time to have some sex with Mr. Ciggarette! Hope you like anal, baby!
Shit, fuck, gotta run away!
Don't you do this to me baby!
Must...use...Santa...power!
OH GOD IT BURNS.
BWAHAHA!!! SANTA = SATAN! ROCK ON KIDS!

 

by SFH
10-29-02
I JUST KILLED THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND!
Awesome! Goddamn Queen!
OH WELL, I THINK I'LL KILL THE KING NOW.
Awesome! Goddamn King!
I THINK I'LL NUKE SOME HOSPITALS ON THE WAY.
Son, you're a true American! YEEHAW.

 

by SFH
10-29-02
Where's my robo-cock?
GEHALLA!
You stole it! Didn't you?! You goddamn Towelhead!
JE HALLA GU HALLA GEHALLA!
Just tell me what you did with it man!
GEHALLA!

 

by SFH
10-29-02
The first rule of Fight Club: Don't talk about Fight Club.
You want a balloon?
Did you know that I'm actually Edward Norton? CRAZY!
Balloon? Yes? No?
Fine, I'll take a balloon-doggy.
...Fag...

 

by SFH
10-29-02
Uh, can I help you?
HEY BUDDY YOU GOTTA HELP ME I NEED DRUGS AND A GUN!
GOD HELP US ALL.
Why do people run away?

 

by SFH
10-29-02
We've come for your daughter, Chuck.
My name is Greg.
Don't sass me, Chuck. Now where's your daughter?
My name is Greg, and I don't have a daughter.
I can unbend myself and stab you if you don't hand over the girl.
I can give you my baby sister instead, just don't stab me.

 

by SFH
10-29-02
HI THERE! Would you like to see the inside of a van?!
Come on, it'll be great! Have a sniff of this rag and we'll be on our way!

 

by SFH
10-29-02
Now that I've beamed you up to my ship, would you be interested in buying an encyclopedia? Only 10 bucks.
What kind of propulsion system do you aliens use?
Nevermind that, how about a baby? Only 3 payments of $29.95!
I'd rather ask about your-
Guess my gender? 3 dollars!

 

by SFH
10-29-02
Jesus Christ, I never knew how boring being a snowman was.
I get no respect either, some kid pissed on my back earlier, I think he was tagging a gang sign on me.
Bloodz for life.

 

by SFH
10-29-02
Yeah, wake boarding was great, I'm gonna go again next Sunday- hear comes Claus, you better get back to work.
WORD.
Hey there, Santa. Still on those diet pills?
No, I've stepped it up to crystal meth and gasoline.
Isn't Mrs. Claus anti-drug though?
Bah, how's she gonna know when she's at the bottom of the riv- uh. I gotta go... "murder", my uh... "wife".

 

by SFH
10-29-02
Man! You hippies are like, some crazy cats man!
See my sign? Yeah, it means I want peace, you goddamn beatnik.
Peace? Man! The government won't allow peace man! Peace isn't profitable!
Dude, seriously, shut the fuck up. You're harshing my buzz.
The only thing worse than the government, man, is the daily prison rape.
Read the sign.

 

by SFH
10-29-02
Hey, it's me, Death. *Ahem* I mean, YOUR TIME HAS COME, MORTAL!
Please! I'm too young to die!
Nope, I'm never wrong. Now let's go, I left my Volvo in double-park.
Volvo?
Yeah, how did you think you're getting to Hell? Say, you got any gas money?

 

by SFH
10-29-02
You think you're above the law, holy man? NOBODY parks in a red zone, not even God.
I'm sorry officer, I'll gladly pay the fine.
Where's your "God" now? Get out of my sight.
Jerk.

 

by SFH
10-29-02
Is that your truck?
Yes my son, it is.
Well, I hate to break it to you, but it's in a no-parking zone. That's a $200 fine.
But, I died for your sins, my son.
Do you want to be pepper-sprayed? Because if you keep talking to me like that, that's what you're gonna get.

 

by SFH
10-30-02
Hey, what's goin on? I'm a nuke.
Hey, HEY, don't do that!
Yeah, I know this one sucked.

 

by SFH
10-30-02
Hey there, I'm Windows ME. I'm going to make life as hard as possible for you for the next few years.
I've heard about you. You're really unstable aren't you?
Wow, you really suck ass.
I've heard about you. You're really unstable aren't you?
That's probably a good thing.

 

by SFH
10-30-02
Hey, I'm Windows ME. I'm going to make life as hard as possible for the next few years.
I've heard about you, you're really unstable.
Oh yeah, I'll crash if you look at me the wrong way.
Wow, you sound like a terrible-
...That's probably a good thing.

 

by SFH
10-30-02
Wow, these new slacks are really comfortable. Anyway, gotta get to work.
Hello officer, is there a problem?
Do you always walk around with your penis hanging out of your fly?
Wha...No.. I...
Come with me sir.

 

by SFH
10-30-02
Gotta think of a way to get rid of those Goddamn solicitors.
Hello sir, I'd like to sell you a pocket-sized, automatic melon gutter. But before you say no, let me warn you, I'm a shark of a businessman! Haha!
This will do nicely...
What will do nicely? Sir?

 

by SFH
10-30-02
Well, it's Halloween, you wanna go see a scary movie?
Sure.
Got any suggestions? I think we've seen everything.
Oh man! I saw the scariest movie EVER a while back!
Awesome! What's it called?
"Glitter."

 

by SFH
10-31-02
Help mankind. Love everyone. Cure disease. Make peace.
You're watching Total Request Live!!
TERMINATE WITH EXTREME PREJUDICE. CRUSH. KILL. DESTROY.

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