DestroyAllTacos  

So yeah, that time I had to sit through Coyote Ugly was the most horrible experience in my life.

Well it was a pretty bad movie, I guess.

I mean what the hell kind of stagefright only prohibits you from singing your own original songs, and can only be cured by a special guest appearance by Leann Rimes?

My mom had a case of stage fright exactly like that. Leann Rimes never showed up, and she was so embarrassed she stabbed herself to death with a q-tip. Thanks for bringing it up, dick!

Is there any bizarre tragic occurence that hasn't happened to your mom?

No.