So, I'm very excited about being here for open mic night. Let's start out with a "knock, knock" joke. Knock, knock!
Fuck you.
Excuse me?
I'm here to talk about MY feelings! Not your damn knock knock jokes! Which, might I add, my mother HATES! She knew you'd never amount to anything! I should've listened to her and married Bob instead!
Maybe I should come back when it's not-so-open mic night...
Oh THAT'S right! Go ahead! Run away from your problems like your father always did. Lousy good for nothing! And would it kill you to put the toilet seat down every now and then??
