Death is not a lumberjack, but he plays one on the internet

Author: evil_d

Date: June 22, 2001

by evil_d
6-22-01
Somewhere, in an alternate universe, on a planet very much like our own, but where Al Gore won the 2000 U.S. presidential election....
You can't be here for us, Mr. Reaper! With President Gore in office, we trees are safe!
Zounds, you flora are naive. I'm afraid Gore's talk of "environmental concern" is nothing but a front for his avarice.
Yikes! Say it ain't so, Death! We've been played like a dime-store kazoo with two broken strings!
God, you kids scare easy. Tell ya what I'll do, since I'm such a nice guy. I'm thirsty, so I'll pop off and get a Tab. But when I get back, y'all're goin' down like Archduke Franz Ferdinand.
Yeah, right... that pride will be his downfall! Alright, trees, let's move out! This place is gonna be a desert when he gets back!