It's a conspiracy

Author: evil_d

Date: February 26, 2001

by evil_d
2-26-01
Dear Mr. Jo, First let me assure you that any similarity between myself, Ann Landers, Isadora, or any other advice columnists is purely coincidental and is definitely not...
...part of a government plot to numb people's minds by making them emotionally dependent on an army of zombies who dispense common sense masquerading as helpful advice.
As for your rash and burning sensation, in these cases the best thing to do is to "fight fire with fire" -- literally, I mean, by cauterizing the affected area. Cauterization is a simple and...
...time-honored medical technique and can be performed in the comfort of your own home, without professional aid. Finally, I suggest that you seek help for your paranoid delusions.
The idea that some mysterious "red robot" out to kill you is coming to your door disguised as an Avon saleslady, or, for example, as a Jehovah's Witness, is just plain silly. --Abby
Afternoon, neighbor. I wonder if you could spare a few minutes to discuss the saving power of Jesus Christ.