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| Dear Mr. Jo, First let me assure you that any similarity between myself, Ann Landers, Isadora, or any other advice columnists is purely coincidental and is definitely not... | |
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| ...part of a government plot to numb people's minds by making them emotionally dependent on an army of zombies who dispense common sense masquerading as helpful advice. | |
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| As for your rash and burning sensation, in these cases the best thing to do is to "fight fire with fire" -- literally, I mean, by cauterizing the affected area. Cauterization is a simple and... | |
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| ...time-honored medical technique and can be performed in the comfort of your own home, without professional aid. Finally, I suggest that you seek help for your paranoid delusions. | |
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| The idea that some mysterious "red robot" out to kill you is coming to your door disguised as an Avon saleslady, or, for example, as a Jehovah's Witness, is just plain silly. --Abby | |
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| Afternoon, neighbor. I wonder if you could spare a few minutes to discuss the saving power of Jesus Christ. | |
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