I told you it wasn't a sham!! I won! I finally won!
Won what??
The Publishers Clearing House sweepstakes! Now where did I put that letter?
I'm telling you, it's a crock of shit, just like that fucking Best of Disco CD you bought last year.
Go ahead, open it...
"Dear Mr. Rockman, Congratulations! You have won the Publishers Clearing House Sweepstakes! However, due to the amount of winners this round, the check enclosed is only good for $1.50".....Ah dammit.
