1. You drop an aquarium on your foot.
2. You get a splinter the size of a steak knife embedded in the same foot ten minutes later.
3. You oversleep, anticipating the alarms to be 20 min ahead, only to find out they're 5 min behind.
4. Your carton of milk has frozen solid.
5. The only pants you have clean are the ones 4 sizes too big.
6. Your contacts have a lovely burning feeling to them, despite being brand new.
7. You drink the last can of Dr. Pepper for breakfast.
8. You accidentally dump your pills in the toilet.
9. Your last $5 has mysteriously disappeared, wiping out options for lunch.
10. You wake up with songs from the Wal-Mart Radio stuck in your head.

So far I'm batting 10 for 10. How about you guys?

11. ivytheplant starts a new thread on stripcreator.com

(i don't mean that btw)

---
Batman created by Bob Kane

12. You see dcomposed has made new comics.

---
dcomposed:11-06-05: If I was a viking invading your village, you'd be the first to get raped.
Crabby: 10/5/06: i would love to feed you fresh fruit while bathing you.

13. You wake up next to KajunFirefly

---
The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

14. You wake up.

15. You don't wake up because you're in a coma after being flogged in the back of the head by a giant red mechanical dong.

---
Poop.

16. RAAAARRRR!

---
RAAARRR!!!

17. When you notice your car isn't in the same spot you parked it in.

18. You look in the mirror and realize that you're actually dcomposed.

---
...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

19. Your penis has been glued to your stomach.

---
Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

20. ...it has a 'd' in it.

1. You realize general discussion has no threads of worth anymore.

---
possible savior probable SEX MACHINE

22. You realize you can't count.

23:You acidently fuck up posting and are bombarded by people laughing at you for one little mistake.

---
possible savior probable SEX MACHINE

24. HAHAHAHAHA!

---
peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

25. Wayne Brady.

26. There's an action news team parked outside of your house
27. Your neighbor sold his place to the Hell's Angels
28. You notice all of your furniture is in the street

29. You wake up only to see your grinning Grandmothers face endrenced with feces and semen, and she's pointing at you.

---
"You grew up like brothers, and your teachers must have told you that North and South must not fight!

30. Meryl Streep.

31. Your last name is Blankenship.

32. Your penis starts fighting back.

---
Poop.

33. Ben Stiller.

34. Ben Affleck.

---
Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

35. Ben & Jerry

36. Ben Stein.

---
all the wrong things for all the right reasons