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"Eat a fucking cock." - attitudechicka

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"Eat a fucking cock." - attitudechicka

I got comic #83838! Scroe!!!

CC 138: 'Cause I'm half the man I used to be... by Drexle 8-20-02

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"Eat a fucking cock." - attitudechicka

Already 45 Minutes Late by kaufman 8-20-02

I said I'll be down in a minute. I just have to decide how I want my hair!

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

You said stand-up, so...

Homophobophobia by boorite 8-20-02

Hey, any QUEERS in the audience tonight? Oh, uh, sorry, third row... There goes my whole routine. G'nite, folks!

Showtime by boorite 8-20-02

What's up with the way black people drive? All down low in the driver's seat, like.... VVVRROOOOM! buhbuhbuhbuhbuh VROOOOM! Gosh, this Apollo crowd is tough!

Flop sweat by boorite 8-20-02

And what's up with women? Why are they such bitches? Am I right, guys? Guys?

Dreams really can come true by boorite 8-20-02

And have you ever had that dream where you forget your pants in the dressing room, and you're up on stage.... Shit, this is real, isn't it?

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What others say about boorite!

Standup Comedy Night 7 (CC: 138) by mutsje2000 8-20-02

You suck! Yeah, you and your fucking tee-shirt! Get a goddamn haircut you red-haired, moustachioed freak! Yeah, motherfucker... I'm talking to you, you inbred, white trash, redneck motherfucker! Quit playin' witcho' balls when I'm talkin' to you! Hey, hey... I know ya' ain't turning your back on me, motherfucker! You getcho' white ass back here!

Standup Comedy Night 8 (CC: 138) by mutsje2000 8-20-02

I squeezed my cock into her. She was only thiiiiiiis wide. It was a tight squeeze, but it all came together in the end.

/benny/

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My metaphors are metafives...

CC 138: Voices by BigEvilDan 8-20-02

Stop it! Why won't you leave me alone! Get out of my head! Fine, I'll do what you ask! Just go away! "Do your laundry." Why can't I get the cool, murderous voices in my head?

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III

I'm not kidding!

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"Eat a fucking cock." - attitudechicka

Sad but true...

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"Eat a fucking cock." - attitudechicka

Smarmulus is for the Constitution, human rights, and international law.

Communist!

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What others say about boorite!

Damn straight!

Thanks boorite.

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"Eat a fucking cock." - attitudechicka

Picture of Dorian Grey by Namgubed 8-21-02

Moh!

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"There's no point in beating a dead horse ... except, of course, for the pure joy of it." - A. Whitney Brown

That is sheer genius, 'Gubed. *applause*

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

CC138 - Stand Up! Entry 1: It's Hideous! by Shadow_Artist 8-21-02

Okay people! Let's get ready to…why are you looking around the room? Why are…oh, wait a minute. I’ve gone invisible again, haven’t I? Damn! Still the doctor warned me I might go this way. Don’t worry people, I always carry a mask. It'll give you some idea of where I am. Let me put it on… Better?

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Carry the battle to them. Don't let them bring it to you. Put them on the defensive. And don't ever apologize for anything. - Harry S Truman, 33rd president of US (1884 - 1972)

Ice Skating by ObiJo 8-21-02

I went ice skating yesterday. And I found myself either looking up and skating, or looking down and trying not to fall. And that's when it hit me. Such is life.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

I know I can't win my own contest, but that's no reason to deprive the rest of you of my hysterical wit.

Land mines by evil_d 8-21-02

Just a few more! And then when the enemy advances on us, they'll be blown to smithereens! Man, I'm a fucking genius. I don't know why nobody else thought to plant land mines in this

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

CC138: MirrorrorriM by NeoVid 8-21-02

You know, until a year ago, I never realized just how hot I am. Then again, I could just think that because I'm so damn arrogant. I wonder what would be a sign of vanity... Talking to the mirror.

CC138: I like pointless rivalry by NeoVid 8-21-02

I used to think I was worthless. The most pathetic person on the planet. Then I found out that Devin guy doesn't know how to have fun in the dark.

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

Gabe & Grey Comedy Review #1 by itsclark 8-21-02

Good evening folks. Welcome to G&G Comedy Review, where laughter is mandatory. You know, ever since the Andorran fleet "liberated" Earth, things just couldn't be better! Why, I haven't seen a more peace loving regime since all the earthly seats of government were vaporized! But I kid.

Gabe and Grey Comedy Review #1B by itsclark 8-21-02

Just the other day, I was telling a friend how I felt about the Andorrans eliminating disease and homelessness! I went on about how great it is that we no longer have to pay taxes! Then my supervisor beat me with his electro-whip for talking during work hours.

Gabe & Grey Comedy Review #2 by itsclark 8-21-02

I find that laboring 14 hours a day in the Emperor's plutonium mines really developes the body! Why just the other day, I found I'd developed a third testicle! (Psst! You're making me nervous. I'm losing them!)

Gabe and Grey Comedy Review #3 by itsclark 8-21-02

I ran into a recent tech school graduate down in the slave pits yesterday. He seemed happy to have work!

Gabe and Grey Comedy Review #4 by itsclark 8-21-02

This is rediculous. I'm doing stand-up for a bunch of alien goons! I should just grab his gun and escape. I did it. Now to join the resistance! weeks later... Hey, it's a well dressed crowd out there tonight! Who does your looting for you? Ha ha ha ha.

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

CC138: Solo performance... by DexX 8-21-02

...but what I never told her was that I'd never been to Scotland in my whole life! Ha! Fuck this... this is pointless... Stand-up comedy is hard when the rules say you can't have an audience.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

CC138: Solo Performance 2... by DexX 8-21-02

I;ve decided that, despite the lack of audience, I will keep doing my stand-up anyway. I mean, hey, no hecklers!

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

... by ObiJo 8-21-02

So Jacob's like "Accountant" and Isiah's like "Lawyer" and I'm like "Lord and Savior, motherfuckers!" HaHa! Oh how I love class reunions.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

fUcK tArDiNeSs by ObiJo 8-22-02

You can take the hell wraith out of hell... But you can't take the hell out of the hell wraith. *SCREEEEEEEECH* Or my rec room. mOrE pRiNgLeS, mOrTaL fUcK tArD!!! *SCRRRRRREEEEECH*

I thought this one was non-compliant so decided to post it.

CAUSE I AIN'T NOBODY'S BITCH!!!

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

The truth is out there? by El_Bofus 8-22-02

Sean "P. Diddy" Combs speaks... So its like I was telling Tupac right before I paid off the hitman..."We need to play down our high profiles. What if one of us were to get killed?" I strongly suggest that Mr. T make a run for the presidency.

ok, so it sucks and you have to think about it, but you've gotten to know my ways of madness by now, right?
ok ok, it sucks.

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Mmm...they speak to you!!!

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"Eat a fucking cock." - attitudechicka