Why Family Circus Is Only One Panel: 7/11/07 by boloboffin 7-25-07

Is this what it's like to be on a date, Daddy? It depends. How much am I going to have to spend before you put out?

FTC 103: The Hey-Day in the Blood Is Tame by boloboffin 1-11-07

Debbie--your blind date is here. Oh, boy! Yay! Ask him if he's got a grandfather.

Ray-Ray The Ex-Gay by boloboffin 10-30-07

Hi. I'm Ray-Ray. I'm an ex-gay. A what? An ex-gay. That means I used to submit to same sex attraction, but through the power of Jesus, I have been liberated from my sin! Praise Jesus! So, Ray-Ray, do you not want to suck cock at all, or do you still get that itch in the back of your throat? I... Uh... I confess that Satan can still tempt me, but that just means I'm -- Gay.

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

RCL no. 1741 by RandomComicLayoutGuy 11-28-07

Hey, dad... It's me again. Here for my annual visit to your gravesite... Boy, what a fucked up year I just had! I lost my job, I lost my home, my wife left me, my kids hate me, and I just got diagnosed with a raging case of anal herpes! I wonder what advice you'd give to me if you were alive today... I'd advise you to go buy a twelve-guage shotgun, load it, place the open end of the barrel in your mouth, and pull the trigger, you fucking loser!

Going Outside Traditional Gender Roles by kane2742 11-29-07

I like to work on cars, even though that's usually a guy thing. It's fun. I knit; I think it's relaxing. I wear women's underwear. It's silky-smooth and makes me feel pretty. What?

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

BTC by HCRoyall 12-03-07

Apology NOT accepted!

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

It Was the Best of Hamsters, It Was the Worst of Hamsters by biped 12-16-07

...and that's my theory on how to use hamsters as a measurement of time. You'll get the fucking Nobel Prize for this, you vainglorious BASTARD. Oh my, it's hamster-thirty. I missed my anal exam. Meet me at Spago's, baby. Say around...hamster-ish? Good evening, and welcome to the Hamster O'Clock News. We're only split-hamsters away from the President's big announcement.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

RCL no. 1750 by RandomComicLayoutGuy 12-31-07

It's almost two thousand-eight... I can hardly wait! Do you think it's my fate for us to go out on a date in two thousand eight? Before an answer I orate, I have cause to hesitate... Why would I choose you as a mate? Oh, the joy for you I can create! All the good things I can bring to the plate. All your desires I will satiate. May I wait for you outside your gate..? If, it's true what you state, then, meet me tomorrow night at eight. Now I must go home and rotate milking the "twins" because they ache as they've begun to swell with lactate... Great, it's a date! I'll see you outside your gate at eight. In the meantime, I'll cogitate about your swelling breasts full of lactate, then go home and fever-ishly masturbate...

ima pimp someone else's strip:

Car Accident No. 5, 2007

Ya remember when you asked me what my favorite Jackson Pollock piece was? Well, I think I'm drunk enough to show ya now...

by AndTeenAngstForAll, 12-23-07

Deaf Sara IX by RedfeatheR 1-16-06

RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG *sniff* Ee's neber gunna cahwl RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG RIIIIIINNNGGGG

Ed's Knife's Edge VIII by RedfeatheR 2-06-06

The world is ending and everthing so I'm just gonna put this out there... ...wow I thought this'd be easier to write... but it's not... ...I know I haven't been a women for long now... ...and I'm still legally your brother and all... but I have been thinking about asking a male family member this for a long time... ...so here it is... ...do you think Uncle Randy's phone number is the same now as it was back when he was molesting you?

Pocket Pals X by RedfeatheR 2-13-06

Can one spontaneously change race? What? No Cos I think I was black once You prolly just had a boner

Political Debate by Ekirh 5-22-06

EXTREME LEFT WING OPINION THAT SPARKS OF SOCIALISTIC IDEAS AND BORROWS FROM GORE VIDEL!!!! EXTREME RIGHT WING IDEAS THAT HITS NATIONALISM AND BORROWS FROM WILLIAM BUCKLEY!!! Centerist view point that pleases both sides, makes loads of sense, and will help move America forward and do a lot to bring us together. What the fuck are you talking about? That's some dumbshit That's dangerous thinking, lets shoot him.

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

At The Office: Have you heard? by melvin2345 1-16-08

Hey Jeff, did you hear about the big merger? What fuckin merger? We're merging with GloboCon Tech. Starting next month, all their people will be in this building with us. Not if they don't make it through the night...... Jeff, you can't just murder all your problems away. I could if you'd let me.

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

Street School Boy Gay Sex Tip Vendor

Squeeze your boner till it goes numb. It feels like you're holding another mans penis

by smamurai, 1-17-08

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GOVT. Warning: Do not smoke around children they will badger you for fags.

Groovy! - Let's give the boy a hand[job]! by edoggydog 1-19-08

Yesterday, I see the girl of my dreams at the mall. So, I walked up to her and started a conversation... Groovy! Out f nowhere, she says to me that not only can she tell I whack off a lot, but that she knows which hand I use! The left one, right? Jesus H. CHRIST!! Is it that obvious?? Uh...

The Billy Seinfeld Show by biped 2-18-08

Mom, how can I tell whether or not I'm going to have a big, hairy dick? (GASP!) ED!!! BILLY HAS SOMETHING HE WANTS TO DISCUSS WITH YOU!!! But gee, Dad...you and Mother assured me that I could confide in you regarding personal concerns. Knock off the "Leave It To Beaver" shit, son. I know when someone's yanking my pecker. (sigh) Why is my dick such a "hands-off" subject? I guess Mom and Dad just can't handle my dick. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

RCL no. 1782 by RandomComicLayoutGuy 2-18-08

What the funky chicken is going on here, Frank? I just successfully injected the club's greenskeeper with a "smart" serum that has minimal side effects... Are you saying he's now a genius or something? His IQ jumped fifty points seconds after he recieved it! If, he's so smart, why is he making love to the thirteenth hole? It's one of the minimal side effects I'm trying to work out...

RCL no. 1799 by RandomComicLayoutGuy 3-05-08

Daaaaaaaamn! Check out dat bitch, Tyler... She's one fine sistah! When you say "sistah", are you really saying "NAGGER"? Are you saying all black women nag? Please, forgive me, Pimp! I never meant to imply that sistahs are nag-gers... That's just how I pronounce "NIGGER"... What?

Gygaxian

Did you hear that the creator of D&D died this week? Damn... of all the things I thought they couldn't cut out of 4th Edition....

by NeoVid, 3-07-08

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

Groovy! - Irashe-mase! by edoggydog 3-17-08

Spare change for the needy, mister? Groovy! I meant, could you DONATE some spare change for a good cause, smartass! Depends... What's the cause? We're trying to raise funds to build a place called, "The TEMPURA House". Oh, yeah... Isn't that a shelter for LIGHTLY BATTERED women?

Lord of the Star Trek:The Empire strikes back by The_young_scot 4-11-08

There are none who can stand against the power of Darth Sauron, it would be wise, Picard the Grey, to join him. Tell me, Number one. When did Riker the Wise abandon reason for madness? The One Ring will have to be dropped deep within the Borg Death Star Cube into this small vent shaft, which is only a few meters wide. That's nothing, I used to bullseye Tribbles with photon torpedo's back home I'm glad that you're here Sam, at the end of all things Shut up Wesley!

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The following statement its true. The previous statement is false

Someday, I'll have a comic idea that doesn't come from a RL conversation.

 

Impossibility by NeoVid 5-05-08

My girlfriend wants it so often it's killing me. Uh... yeah. I really feel sorry for you, man. Seriously, she's a complete... what's the word for a woman who can't get enough sex? "Godsend?" "Imaginary?"

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

RCL no. 1850 by RandomComicLayoutGuy 5-08-08

Who the [ *hic* ] are you? I'm the imaginary pink donkey you only see when when you're drunk off your ass... Oh. [ *burp* ] Shay... Shouldn't you be a pink elephant? We're in a recession...

Next Time, Pick Your Nose by MikeyG 4-27-07

Ay ee aye oh yoo ay ee aye oh yoo....Holy crap, I hope he didn't catch me making those stupid faces. Hey Jim, what's up? Want to hear some fucked-up shit? Uh...sure! Gary down in Receiving got into an accident on his motorcycle yesterday, got half his face ripped off by the ground. Oh my GOD! That's horrible! Yeah, but not as horrible as those stupid fucking faces you were just making.

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

Sally's TV Treat by biped 6-02-08

It's time once again for "The Mister Kitty Cat Show." And now... heeeere's Mister Kitty Cat . "Meow...meow. Meow, meow, meow...meow." And now, a message from "Anal Annihilator" stay-hard creams and vibrating butt plugs.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Anxiety by FinnNYC 6-05-08

Hey Gene, I've got a joke for you. Shoot. How many scientists does it take to clean up some monkey poop once in awhile? ...um, I don't know. How many? More that we've got around here, that's for damn sure! ...You need to get out of this Paxil trial. You're losin' it.

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-=- You eat one lousy foot and they call you a cannibal. What a world. -=-

Dr. Dog by biped 6-09-08

Well, the patient is ready. This will be an extremely delicate brain operation. We'll all be praying for Dr. Dog to succeed. Yes. Oh, and I meant to ask--why is this complicated brain surgery being performed by a dog? Instead of a human, I mean. Fuck. I don't know. Oh my god.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Fussypants Goes Hollywood by ArtemisStrong 6-14-08

I told you not to- I KNOW I KNOW! "YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE PULLED THE PIN ON THE ANTIQUE GRENADE"! Just as long as we're on the same page.