How Does it Feel? by kaufman 9-26-02

After 10 months of intense voice training, the comeback tour begins. Once upon a time my voice did shine. Every sung line you heard just fine... Needn't noo?

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

OK, here's my real entry (and possibly my best contest entry ever)

an unrelated note... please take fights out of the contest and into the fight's go here forum... for fuck's sake...

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"Eat a fucking cock." - attitudechicka

Billy Joel sure is popular with this crowd.

And I got a Bob Dylan strip too:

CC 143: Bob Dylan needs Sprint PCS by Devin 9-26-02

Before Warnce ippoawn a tahm noo drissed so fahn. Yoo trew tuh booms a dahm een noor prahm... After Warnce ippoawn a tahm noo drissed so fahn. Yoo trew tuh booms a dahm een noor prahm... There are some people that even we can't clear up. For the rest of you, there's Sprint PCS. Needent Noo?

(Bob Dylan's singing plagarized from fuzzy.)

Dev: The title of that strip wrecked the punchline.

You'll learn to use crappy titles like I do.

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

Agreed.

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Welcome to Bohemia. Population: a lot Cash flow: a little

:-(

Yeah, you're right, I gave it away completely. I need to be careful with that.

I dedicate this one to the "Eponine" thread in the General Discussion board.

The music comes from Michael Jackson's "Smooth Criminal" or Alien Ant Farm's song of the same name (rip-offs!). If this contest has taught me anything, it's that there's already a lot of non-Napster-related copyright infringing out there. :-P

CC 143: A bad musical by Devin 9-26-02

It was the start of the show, a woman began with a crescendo... I'd rather be in my apartment, I'm gonna vomit on the carpet. I am also unable, to plug my ears up with name labels... He finally went into the men's room, but even there the singer's voice boomed. ARGH!!!

CC 143: A bad musical (2) by Devin 9-26-02

Indy are you okay, are you okay, are you okay Indy? Indy are you okay, are you okay, are you okay Indy? Indy are you okay, are you okay, are you okay Indy? Indy are you okay, are you okay, are you okay Indy?!

CC 143: A bad musical (3) by Devin 9-26-02

Indy are you okay? Will you tell me, that you're okay? It's the beginning of the show, and you missed the crescendo Indy! I'd rather be in my apartment; I almost vomit on the carpet! What in the heck is wrong with you? I can hear singing from the men's room!

CC 143: A bad musical (4) by Devin 9-26-02

Indy are you okay, are you okay, are you okay Indy? Indy are you okay, are you okay, are you okay Indy? Indy are you okay, are you okay, are you okay Indy? I've been hit by, I've been hit by, a bad musical!

CC 143: A bad musical (5) by Devin 9-26-02

But Indy you've come all this way... So what, this is hell of gay! But what will you do in your situation? I will resort to... masturbation!

[Click to view comic: 'CC 143: A bad musical (2)']
[Click to view comic: 'CC 143: A bad musical (3)']
[Click to view comic: 'CC 143: A bad musical (6)']

I'll have to post this entire song someday.

CC 143: the Bo-Heyman rhapsody by NeoVid 9-26-02

I'm an average Joe, with a wrestling job, your average jabroni, a no-talent slob, I always end up with my back on the mat, I lost to Al Snow in_seven_seconds_flat... He's a jobber, what a jobber, the world's biggest jobber I go through each match, and sometimes I cheat, but no matter what I do, I usually get beat. I lose to the heels, I lose to the faces, I've left on a stretcher from_dozens_of_places... My wife and kids, their heads hang in shame. My own tag team partner can't remember my name, sometimes I do a cool move, but the fans just_aren't_interested... No way, uh uh

Now, who knows what song this parodies?

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

CC 143: Frankie Goes to Hamletland by kaufman 9-26-02

Start spreading the dirt, I'm digging today. I'm gonna exhume my old friend. I knew Yorick, knew Yorick! The poisoned ex-king is seeking revenge. Right through his melancholy son who knew Yorick, knew Yorick! I'm gonna kill Rosenkrantz and Guildenstern, and off my bastard uncle, and his one lad, Hand me that sword, I smell a rat! These heartthrobs of mine are floating away. I fear I've lost a lass alas. And Yorick, poor Yorick. And if the body count's 8, Not to be is my fate. You'll return to Yorick, Yorick.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

He would if he could by Spankling 9-26-02

Someone's knockin' at the door. Somebody's ringin' the bell. *BANG BANG BANG* Someone's knockin' at the door. Somebody's ringin' the bell. Police! Open up stiff man! Do me a favor. Open the door and let 'em in. Come out with your hands up!

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

taking the piss out of a 2nd rate faux author
(warning - this may be the single most disturbing thing you ever read on StripCreator)

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"Eat a fucking cock." - attitudechicka

It isn't even remotely close.

[b]FYI... I will probably not be able to get to judging tonight. So in true ObiJo fashion, I'm delaying the end of the contest until "some time this weekend."

So until I say something like, "okay, I've started judging," keep sending in these excellent entries.
[/b]

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

guh-fucking-faw

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I am a delicate fucking flower. https://beacons.ai/jesskent

CC143 - An Inhuman League by Ezrael 9-27-02

She was working as a dominatrix in a leather bar when I met her RING I picked her up and showed her my chimp and good times were found Yes? I have your little furry friend here without you. Now she's turned to someone who... GIVE ME BACK MY MONKEY! GIVE HIM BACK, NOOOOOOOOOW! YOU KNOW I CAN RETRIEVE IT IF I HAVE TO KILL A LEGION! Now I think it's time you paid me what I deserve, or your monkey's doomed.

Here's hoping I haven't managed to screw this post up as badly as I expect to.

CC 143 - How much for just the ape? (Rob Zombie remix) by Ezrael 9-27-02

It's a perfect plan he's a complete heel, he'll pay for the ape, believe me. I never doubted you but I just have to say, do you think he's able to pay? If someone whines like that sack of flan, he'll crack like the Falklands. Meh. Who's that at the door, I should check right away, hold on to the ape for me. Now God's going to hear you scream real loud, the psycho's got an axe for you Where the fuck's my ape, oh don't bother to say, I'll just chop the info FROM YOU!!!!

WW Top by kaufman 9-27-02

I hoard oil, I fix prices. Manufacture fake crises. I ain't asking for much. Send your armies to Baghdad, I'm just looking for some Bush. I cook books, Take a fat raise. Suck dry 4...01(k)s. I ain't asking for much. Take this small contribution, I'm just looking for some Bush. Take me back into jail, Though making charges you do fail! I ain't asking for much. I don't need no due process, I'm just looking for some Bush.

I'll add more verses once comics are made wider and more bearded characters are added.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

WARNING: POLITICS AHEAD
I apologize in advance. If you think you might be offended, please skip this post. And please put any replies in the "Fights Go Here" forum.

This is an Offspring song from their first album. I also have an MP3 of a live performance which is the same except that they replaced the word "Tehran" with "Baghdad".

CC143: The Offspring's "Tehran" (1/3) by evil_d 9-27-02

In your plane in the blue sky, you roam again. Words that echo in your mind make your heart beat faster. "This is no Vietnam. We will win in Iran." The Captain said, Kill or die, die! Islam be damned. Make your last stand in Tehran. Warrior, the time bomb's about to go. What will you feel?

CC143: The Offspring's "Tehran" (2/3) by evil_d 9-27-02

Will you even wonder if the man that's in your sights ever kissed his girl goodbye? The President said, Let it ride, ride! Islam be damned. Make your last stand in Tehran. Great... Satan. Great... Satan. Great... Satan. Ah believe he's talkin' ta me.

CC143: The Offspring's "Tehran" (3/3) by evil_d 9-27-02

Our flags are burning... Soon America may find its young men in the sand, where their casualty is just a number in Iran. The President said, Let it ride, ride! You will be damned. Make your last stand in Tehran.

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

A silly little entry:

CC 143: Let's do it by Devin 9-27-02

Birds do it, bees do it, even educated fleas do it... Let's do it! Yeah! Let's donate to Brad! ...Damn.

CC 143: Get Down by attitudechicka 9-27-02

o/` If I can't have ewe, o/` o/` I don't want nobody, baby. o/` Damn my luck.

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Mediocrity at its most average.

here are some i made like three nights ago.

Contest 143b: Mares eat oats and Halls eat Oates by il_schmucko 9-23-02

Whooa, here he comes... Watch your ass at the Comics Cup... Whooa, here he comes... He's a cornholer! Later, at the after-party. RAARR!! TOBOR CORNHOLE BAD SONGWRITER! Woo! I'll tell John to get the camera!

Contest 143c: More Billy Joel TV/TS goodness! by il_schmucko 9-23-02

I don't care what other people say... I don't think this love affair is gay... This girl I'll marry, even though her ass is hairy... I'll wax her moustache for the longest time! Maybe this won't last very long... 'cause they could be right; she does have a schlong...

Contest 143d: Beatlebum by il_schmucko 9-23-02

She's so... Look, I know it's just a song, and that slang has changed since the '60s, but if you say "heavy," so help me, I'll kick your ass. Take a sad song and make it better... I'm gonna let you down and leave you flat...

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"I don't know who you are, schmucko, but you rule." - lara7 | christ@myself.com

CC143: A Tribute to sub_m7/clone77/etc., BonJovi-style by TheBlairZip 9-27-02

It's all the same, only my names will change. Everyday, it seems, we're wasting away. Another site, where the faces are so cold. I'd surf all night just to find a home. I'm a cowboy. On a pink horse, I ride. I'm wanted, dead or... Trust me, around here you're only wanted dead or dead, so don't even bother finishing that fucking lyric! Just shut the fuck up and hack V-girl's site already! Jesus Christ, you fucking pussy!

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If it wasn't for bad luck I wouldn't have no luck at all. D'OH!

CC 143 - At any moment, Dokken may come for us all. by Ezrael 9-27-02

I'm wanting a pround marmoset, I want him to gibber again Whoa nelly, you lost control, they're deader than sin again Can anyone find that chimp again? Don't know, don't know, don't really care. I am not singing a Pete Yorn song. DOKKEN!

CC 143: The new Elephant Show lyrics by boinky33 9-27-02

Skinner-a-rink my dink is pink, and after sex it's blue. I EAT POO. I fuck ya in the morning, and in the afternoon. I fuck ya in the evening, and cover you with goo! skinner-a-rink I watch "kink" and then I like to screw IIIIIIII...LOVE you you boo boo ba do!