What you nitpick my selection by telling me how useful the f11 key can be? Jeez, It really wasn't a serious pick because as you may have noticed the 'enter' key is in at No.4 and let's face ot the Enter key is boss.

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GOVT. Warning: Do not smoke around children they will badger you for fags.

Not if it's called "Enter". The real name is "Return". CRLF will do in a pinch.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

I was going to say 'return' but I though I'd get young punk coming in and telling me it's called and enter key.

Great! Now I have a half finished strip idea rolling around my head about a kid with brittle bones damaging himself when using the return key. The punchline would be " Now that's what I call braking and entering."
Substitute the BB kid for a breakdancing street youth and it works just as well.

I can't be arsed fleshing it out, Mikey U can have it if you want. lol

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GOVT. Warning: Do not smoke around children they will badger you for fags.

Bottom 5 keys on a keyboard:
5th: Tie between `, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 0, -, =, backspace, insert, home, page up, num lock, /, *, -
4th: Tie between tab, q, w, e, r, t, y, u, i, o, p, [, ], \, delete, end, page down, 7, 8, 9, +
3rd: Tie between caps lock, a, s, d, f, g, h, j, k, l, ;, ', return, 4, 5, 6, +
2nd: Tie between shift, z, x, c, v, b, n, m, ,, ., /, shift, up, 1, 2, 3, enter
1st: ctrl, alt, spacebar, alt, ctrl, left, down, right, 0, ., enter, and the retarded keys (like the apple key or the windows key)

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AFROMANS MOVE

How about scroll lock? Who the hell ever uses scroll lock?

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Poop.

Many great historical figures have used scroll lock, including Joan of Arc, Napoleon Bonaparte, Abraham Lincoln and Winston Churchill.

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AFROMANS MOVE

Wgat about Sys Rq? I didn't even know I HAD a Sys Rq button until I searched my keyboard just now.

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Legalize Love!

I see nothing of this Sys Rq button, stop making shit up.

...

Oh wait I just saw it... but on mine it's on the same button as Print Screen, which actually has a use.

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Poop.

Motifs by andydougan 8-28-03

I noticed today that my keyboard doesn't have a shift lock key. Have they been phased out? Probably no one really used them anyway. Today my lover and I watched the rising sun pour its kaleidoscopic aurora across the mottled hills, making the most of our fleeting existence on this planet. I mean, they make all the numbers come up as punctuation marks.

Don't forget the entirely useless "Break" key which nestles quietly next to the delete key. Once upon a time, back in the days of the BBC Micro and the Acorn Electron, the Break key enjoyed frequent usage with its tag-team friend, Shift. Now, it is relegated to nothingness. Does anyone know what it's for?

The ultimate scroll lock was described in Exodus 36-37, and later in Raiders of the Lost Ark.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

On my keyboard it's doubled up with the Pause key, which seems to be just as useless. I think some games default to use it to pause the game, but for the most part people just use P to do that.

There should be a webpage that has the history of all keyboard keys.

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Poop.

Break by niteowl 3-31-04

What is this "Break" key for? It means you'll be breaking shit in about 10 seconds, after I give you the Blue Screen of Death.

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

I broke the keyboard tray off my computer desk yesterday, after the CD that came with my video card refused to read. Mere particle board is no match for my mighty fists of fury.

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

My friend Petra(who makes the Kitty Banana comics) has her keyboard reaarranged so it says "Petra" all over it. IT'S SO DAMN ANNOYING. It's also a major pain in the ass to type on.

So that tops my list as the worst keyboard set up.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

Worst. Keyboard. Evar.

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Poop.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

You just had to show me up by posting an ever worse keyboard, didn't you?

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Poop.

Bottom Five Ways to Spell Color:

5.Color
4.Colour
3.Coloure
2.Colouré
1.Condelizza Rice

Five Worst Ways to Spell "Condoleeza Rice":

5.) Condompleeza Nice
4.) Condogeezer Mice
3.) Lando Calrissian
2.) Cuntasneeza Lice
1.) Uncle Ben

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

You forgot Condelingus Rice.

You also forgot "Condoleeza Rice".

-- Smarmy Andy

Bottom Five Worst Top Five Lists:

5. Top five things that rhyme with "stork"
4. Top five ways of accidentally becoming Pope
3. Top five people who know what Seth Green tastes like
2. Top five zit constellations on Rosie O'Donnell's ass
1. Top five ways of making your neighbor's dog feel "pretty"

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.