I can't decide what to use for my profile text.

Unfortunately, "Fnerf." is already taken.

Any other suggestions?

It's hot. I can't sleep. I'm bored. Amuse me.

---
"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

quote:

---

I can't decide what to use for my profile text.

Unfortunately, "Fnerf." is already taken.

Any other suggestions?

It's hot. I can't sleep. I'm bored. Amuse me.

---

"I'm wirthless."

I said, "Amuse me."

---
"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

"WIRTHLING! Thirty *million* pink donkeys can't be wrong!"

-DH1

---
Needs more sodomy.

That's better.

---
"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

Sorry, I thought you said "Abuse me." I was wondering how that was supposed to be any different from normal

Three years of strippin', two years of sodomy one year of givin' to ya mama. It's wirthling.

---
I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

Wirthling powers, activate! Form of, a donkey!

---
100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

With his many years of daily self-abuse, Wirthling brings a mature quality to his depictions of unspeakable sex acts. Watching and committing sodomy is a passion for Wirthling, who feels most at home in a humid peep-show booth with sticky doorknobs. He finds a stimulating challenge in waiting until the last possible moment to deposit the next coin and keep the show going. Wirthling gives himself body and soul to Stripcreator in the never-ending quest for free bukakke pics and overseas tentacle rape porn. Disgusting!

---
What others say about boorite!

wirthling's comics: For when you just can't find any good porn. (TM)

---
I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

"You wanna sofa? It's puffy. I got pictures. I'll through in a donkey! Please?... Anyone?... ANYONE!?!

TAKE THIS FUCKING THING AND GIVE ME MONEY! GOD! I NEVER WANTED THE GOD DAMN THING! FOR THE LOVE OF SODOMY - TAKE THIS FUCKING SOFA AND GIVE ME ANYTHING! GUM! FUCK!

---
"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

Actually, the furniture was sold.

[i]Bob: "Johnny, what's the next item up for bid on The Price is Right?!"

Johnny: "Well, Bob, the next item up for bid is a CD by Arrested Development! It was very popular in 1992![/i]

We'll be having a yard sale August 18 - 19 to sell all the crap that isn't worth advertising. All are welcome...

---
"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

Just out of curiosity I went on Google and did a search for 'gum fuck'. This was about the third from the top...

Caption:
Monster Short Bus
The tards ain't takin' no more shit!

---
100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

What part of Maryland is this again?

---
The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

What part of Maryland is this again?

---

Columbia

---
"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

If you're selling any stuff that's actually worth a lot of money but you don't realize it 'cause you're dumb, I'll buy it. Things like Aunt Selma's emerald and diamond encrusted tiara that you've been using as a cigar holder would be just peachy.

---
100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

Or even a cigar encrusted Aunt Selma...

---
"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

What part of Maryland is this again?

---

Columbia

---

For those of you living outside the area, you're probably familiar with those 50s movies where some innocuous creature is exposed to radiation and becomes this huge mutant thing that goes on a terrorizing rampage? Well, Columbia's like a homeowner's association exposed to 50s radiation -- I'm amazed you can get away with such a yard sale!

In all seriousness, as it turns out, I'll be up at Merriwether on the 19th.

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

And I'm likely to be in South Jersey that whole weekend. But if that falls through, I'll stop by.

---
The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

We can only sell color-coordinated crap.

Who's playing?

---
"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

Oh, I see. I'm the fall-back plan in case the Jersey thing doesn't work out. Bite me.

---
"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

I'm not sure people from Columbia have room to talk trash about New Jersey.

Anyway, one of my best friends is going to be home -- in Jersey -- for that particular weekend only, before going to India for seven months. So, yeah, buying a lamp shaped like a pink donkey at a yard sale is going to have to take a back seat to that.

---
The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

quote:

---

I'm not sure people from Columbia have room to talk trash about New Jersey.

---

Shit, people from Delaware have room to talk trash about New Jersey.

---
What others say about boorite!

We can only sell color-coordinated crap.

Who's playing?

---

I just looked it up -- Crosby, Stills, and Nash.

kaufman is an old fart.

---
"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

Who's playing?

---

I just looked it up -- Crosby, Stills, and Nash.

kaufman is an old fart.

---

Hey, seeing them doesn't automatically make you old. I saw them once before -- when I was 17.

Granted, Jimmy Carter was president then, but who's counting?

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com