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ArtemisStrong
masturbating to Japanese shit porn

Member Rated:

Or at least I wish I was. It is a longheld fantasy of mine to have had the chance to see Tim Curry in one of his more private moments away from the hustle and bustle of agents and the glitterati.

What obscure musician would you people like to be?

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Ham-fisted ham fisting.

1-21-04 11:09am (new)
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boinky33
I'm with stupid ^

Member Rated:

Tim Curry.

1-21-04 11:18am (new)
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DragonXero
I'm Here, You're Queer, Get Used to it

Member Rated:

Peter Steele

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

1-21-04 2:02pm (new)
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dcomposed
C3H5N3O9

Member Rated:

Didn't bunner eat Tim Curry?

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Batman created by Bob Kane

1-21-04 2:29pm (new)
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xxausrottenxx
Sock of the walk

Member Rated:

no, that was semen

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xx( o Y o. )xx

1-21-04 5:42pm (new)
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Inflatable_Man
Heart stopper. Hip hopper. Pill popper.

Member Rated:

You wanna be this guy?!?

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Destroying my reputation one post at a time.

1-21-04 7:23pm (new)
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DragonXero
I'm Here, You're Queer, Get Used to it

Member Rated:

Yep, I wanna be a RED X MAN!

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

1-21-04 7:28pm (new)
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boinky33
I'm with stupid ^

Member Rated:

You idiot! That's Red X LAD!

1-21-04 7:49pm (new)
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DragonXero
I'm Here, You're Queer, Get Used to it

Member Rated:

Oh, right. Didn't notice the accented lower-right quadrant.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

1-21-04 7:52pm (new)
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dcomposed
C3H5N3O9

Member Rated:

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Batman created by Bob Kane

1-21-04 7:53pm (new)
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boinky33
I'm with stupid ^

Member Rated:

*shoots dcomposed with an elephant gun*

1-21-04 8:08pm (new)
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MikeyG
Shoots the shit and often misses

Member Rated:

Tee hee!

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

1-22-04 6:54am (new)
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UnknownEric
and the Goblet of Mountain Dew.

Member Rated:

Scott Miller (of Game Theory/Loud Family).

Or Pete Momtchiloff, cause then I would have gotten to sleep with Amelia Fletcher.

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I has a flavor!

1-22-04 8:04am (new)
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ArtemisStrong
masturbating to Japanese shit porn

Member Rated:

[center]
[b]HahaHAHHAH, Many Patinkin, me and my new 90's gang will crush your pathetic actor's head!


HEY, LEE! YAH, RIGHT HERE, I'VE GOT YOU SOMETHING TO [b]SUCK ON! Lousy Jackass.


[br]WHAT YOU SAY, MUTHAFUCK?! I'LL FUCKIN' DESTROY YOU---- WITH SLANDEROUS COMMENTS! Your mamma's a snowballer!
A SNOWBALLER PATINKIN![/center]
SSss.... You just pissed Patinkin off, my friend. Not a smart idea!

HEY MAN! YOU WANT ME TO SHOOT DENNIS COOPER?-->

Well do ya? Do ya want to test me, Ving? I'M AN ACTOR, GODAMMIT! I'M KEEEE-RAYZEEEEE!

[center]
You make me squeal, man! Squeal with peeling laughter! I'M GONNA WORK THAT INTO A SONG!! WHATCHYA' GONNA DO ABOUT IT NOW, PUNK! IT'S ON CD, BURNED INTO SOME SORT OF LIQUID POLY-CARBONATE! IT'S IMMORTAL MAN! LONG AFTER WE HAVE SHUFFLED OFF THIS DISEASED THEATRE OF THE ABSURD -cough- (all this yelling's hard on the throat- anyway-) YOUR STUPIDITY AND INEPT DELIVERY OF DIALOGUE, NOT TO MENTION YOUR OVER-EMOTING STYLE- WILL BE KNOWN TO THE LAST GENERATIONS OF ADAM!
And your daddy likes backrubs![/center]

... What'd you say bout my daddy, boy?

[center]
HE'S DYIN' FOR A RUMP-STUFFIN' THIS CHRISTMAS!


Thank you, you have just signed my death warrant.


No, no, Patinkin would actually never take another artist's life, not even one as superciliously supercilious as yours, Ving. Neither yours, my sweet Coop'.

Nope.

[br]
[br]
[br]

[/center]
I'd get ED-209© to do it! lewl!

[center]
LEE VING, it is night-nighty for you. Cooper... I have no idea who you are, but I'll miss you the most. [b][/b]

ED, NO! GOD, I WAS JUST PASSING THROUGH! I"M JUST A PORNOGRAPHER!

What have I done?! What horrors have I unleashed upon humanity?! I am thankful- agch! - that I am dying, for to live in a world with the monster Patinkin is to live a nightmare, frought with terror and ceaseless torment. I... must... say... cough-hack-cough... you're a... real dick... Patinkin...

Lookatem, ED. Human Garbage... Just like I always knew 'em to be.

If Enforcement Droids were equipped with the necessary tubing and emotive recall programming to produce a tear-like fluid accompanied by a slow-paced jerking motion to approximate the human nervous response called "shuddering"... well, by gum, I would.

[center]

[size=4]Hehehheehhe... First Lee Ving, then... THE WORLD!

OF OFF-BROADWAY PRODUCTIONS![/size][/center]

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Ham-fisted ham fisting.

12-21-05 12:35pm (new)
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mandingo
weak stream

Member Rated:

"I laughed, I cried, I beat a hooker to death with a leg of mutton!" -- Stripcreator Times

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what if nigger meant kite

12-21-05 2:12pm (new)
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boorite
crazy knife lady

Member Rated:

The obscure Bob Schneider and the obscure Big Kenny have several tracks on the Gun Shy soundtrack that I wouldn't mind being responsible for. I doubt I'd want to be either of them, however.

Gun Shy starred Liam Neeson and Oliver Platt. Betcha never saw it.

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What others say about boorite!

12-21-05 3:14pm (new)
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UnknownEric
and the Goblet of Mountain Dew.

Member Rated:

Kind of off-topic, but...

Obscure Records I've Purchased In The Past Six Months:

The Snowdrops - Sleepyhead
The Mendoza Line - Full of Light and Full of Fire
Robyn Hitchcock - Obliteration Pie
Cinerama - John Peel Sessions
The Dentists - Some People Are On The Pitch They Think It's Over It Is Now
The Orchids - Unholy Soul
Northern Picture Library - Alaska
Occasional Keepers - The Beauty of the Empty Vessel
Slaughter Joe - Ze Do Caixao
The Loft - Magpie Eyes 1982-1985
Momus - Otto Spooky
Tender Trap - Language Lessons

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I has a flavor!

12-21-05 3:54pm (new)
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ArtemisStrong
masturbating to Japanese shit porn

Member Rated:

When we last saw the monster Patinkin, he was systematically destroying the dreams of children. Let's peek back in, shall we?:

So, Randy, that's all you can expect: a downward spiral into desperation and futility. Sorry. Maybe if your parents were rich... or you were smart... or at least not ugly... But, oh well. Here's a "Chicago Hope" DVD for ya', kiddo. I'll even sign it for ya'! "Best wishes, 'The Patink'".


This is almost too much fun. But sadly, I think that may very well have possibly been quite probably in all likelihood the last child with dreams I could crush. At least within my reach. I should really get a car. Then I could-


PATINKIN! I knew I smelt you around! Now listen, we got ourselves a quiet little seaside mafia-run haven for meth labs and corporate tax shelters and I don't want a fancy-pants stage actor like yourself lousin' up the nest.


Oh, sure, sure. Real mature, Jarmusch. Y'know, it is a free country asshole. I rest my dogs wherever I needs to.


Okay, Patinkin, I don't want none of your metaphysical sleight-of-hand here. I just want to keep things nice and quaint, alright? If you can't get your head into that, then I'll think you'll find life here will get... complicated. And quick.

[center]Wanna' donut?

[/center]

Heh. Donut. Fuckin' funny. Man, I aint here to "get" into your "headspace" and "promote" a "vibrant" and "community-minded" "township" that "prides" "itself" with-


You can cut it with the fuckin' quotation marks ANYTIME, Patinkin.


Yah, yah, 'kay, no quotation marks, I hear ya'. But I aint here to placate the needs of your freekin' Shangri-goddamn-La yah farkin' got going friggin' here!

I'm HERE to FUCK SHIT UP!

You just don't get it, do ya'? You have no clue what you've stepped into coming to this little town-
[center]
-Err... giant, fast-paced metropolis... Anyway...[/center]

Just look, I'll cut your naive, ignorant, nicely-shaped and pleasantly plump butt a MAJOR break here. The city limits are a brisk 5 mile walk east. I suggest you head there. When you get to the big sign that says

"City Limits. Thank You for visiting, we sure hope you didn't contract AIDS"

... keep walking.


Oh, I see. It's all about the status-quo. And you're top dog here. Top dog of the status-quo. Whatta crock of shit. CROCK. OF. SHIT. You don't even know what I could do to your happy little circle-jerk ya got yerself set up here. What I could do to the people you love.

http://www.odarainternet.com.br/supers/cinema/imagens/jim-jarmusch.jpg[/img][i](What'd I tell yah, Tom? Guy's a total prick.)
So whatcha' gonna' do, Patinkin? Huh? Bring out yer little robot friend? Emotionally scar our children? We've been expecting you, Mandy. We've prepared for your arrival. You have no power here. Aint that right, Tom? Tom? Tom???!!!

gurgle


Okay, what'd you do to him, Patinkin? What'd you do TO TOM WAITS?!

http://www.digirama.co.nz/local/artwork/cover/Large/14/000000136799.gif[/img]Oh, nothing. You guys were ready, remember? Nah, I did nothing. Nothing much, that is. Just a little bit of horseplay, really. The ol' Mandy Patinkin charm. Laid it on thick this time. I gets to town this morning, I kin just feel the rush of a thousand collected anxious breaths being exhaled. I knew you guys run a tight little ship, figured you'd done your homework, got everything neat and tidy 'fore I reared my head. You were waiting. So's, I got to thinkin', you guys were impervious to my onlsaught. What could a lil' guy like "Tink" here do to shake things up a bit? Not much. All I [i]could do was give this town what it really needed. And what it needed-

-was about this much Arsenic per liter in your drinking water!


You sick fuck! I'm calling my pal Megalon in on this case, you, you... you PROTOPLASMIC WASTOID!


Oh please, Jarmusch! You and your art house film friends are no match for "Patink: Master of Chaos". I will feast on your eyeballs, I will do macabre things to your vestigial organs, I will stalk eldritchly amongst your independent music stores haunting your pink-haired numb-skulled sycophantic followers, I will stick my wee-wee in every one of your-
Did you say Megalon?

RAAAAAAAARGGGGGGGGH! ...Jim, Tom.

[br]

Megalon. Awww... shit.

[br]
[br]
[hr]Will Patinkin get out of this predicament?

Will Megalon chow down on his soft asscheeks?

Can Jim Jarmusch find out why his nuts itch so bad, and

if so, do they make a cream or lotion for it?

Will anyone notice that Tom Waits is dead?

Well, I'm asking you. Will they?

---
Ham-fisted ham fisting.

2-01-06 8:52pm (new)
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Kaenash
Comic Overlord

Member Rated:

did you stop taking your medication?

I believed at first when you said I was a modern day Horatio Alger story, that you were doing some obscure Dennnis Millerism, so I replied in kind on your profile about Torquamada.

Now, I believe you were simply communicating what you felt the aliens were trying to inscribe into your mind.

You really need to take the medication daily.

2-01-06 9:19pm (new)
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boorite
crazy knife lady

Member Rated:

[IMG]http://i16.photobucket.com/albums/b5/boorite/willmegalon.jpg[/IMG]

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What others say about boorite!

2-02-06 2:14am (new)
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kramer_vs_kramer
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

quote:
Kind of off-topic, but...

Obscure Records I've Purchased In The Past Six Months:

Robyn Hitchcock - Obliteration Pie


Is this any good? I saw Mr Hitchcock on Monday, and have decided to buy one of his albums, but have no idea which one to get.

2-02-06 3:41am (new)
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bunnerabb
Some bloke.

Member Rated:

Fear was a really shitty band.

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

2-02-06 12:22pm (new)
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ArtemisStrong
masturbating to Japanese shit porn

Member Rated:

Hence, a shitty thread.

---
Ham-fisted ham fisting.

2-02-06 12:23pm (new)
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UnknownEric
and the Goblet of Mountain Dew.

Member Rated:

quote:
quote:
Kind of off-topic, but...

Obscure Records I've Purchased In The Past Six Months:

Robyn Hitchcock - Obliteration Pie


Is this any good? I saw Mr Hitchcock on Monday, and have decided to buy one of his albums, but have no idea which one to get.


The best albums to start with would be I Often Dream Of Trains, Eye, or Moss Elixir. All spectacular albums. Obliteration is a collection of outtakes, so it's probably not a great starting point.

Oh, the Storefront Hitchcock live record ain't half bad, either.

---
I has a flavor!

2-03-06 8:24am (new)
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ArtemisStrong
masturbating to Japanese shit porn

Member Rated:

For me, anything that doesn't get mega radio-play is obscure; so I'd have to say "Her Space Holiday" is one of my favorite new obscure acts in the past couple years.

Being in Portland Oregon means I am constantly reminded how "vibrant" and "expressive" and "cutting-edge" is every single guy with a guitar in this city. We've made a half-hearted resolution at Artecorp Industries to "see more shows" this year in order to cut down on the "mind-numbing monotony" of our lives.

---
Ham-fisted ham fisting.

2-08-06 1:14pm (new)
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