Fantastic Innerspace Voyage by CHUBBY 2-06-05

.....with chest pains. No comments yet from the hospital or his office on the severity of the condition. From Bethesda Naval Hospital, I'm Bill Exposition. Dick! I got here as soon as I heard. How you doin'? Not so good, Dubya. I'm dying. Oh, right.

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 2 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

Doc, isn't there anything we can do? Just make him comfortable. There appears to be an arterial blockage. But because of its location, and Dick's general poor health, we can't get to it without killing him. Well, then, I guess heretofore I'll be in charge. There is one experimental procedure.....

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 3 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

Doc, if there's a chance it might work, we have to try it! Well, it's an experimental technology where we shrink down men and a specially designed "Innerspacecraft" and inject them into a human body. It's being studied by the CIA for covert assassinations. So you're saying that something designed for evil could, in this case, be used for good? Yes. Must..... lie.... down.....

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 4 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

The death-ray on the Innerspacecraft, which is used to cause a heart attack, could potentially be used to disintegrate the blockage and save a life. If we can find a pilot to fly the Innerspacecraft. Sure, but where are we gonna get a pilot on this short notice? Hi, we're here for our annual flight physicals.

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 5 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

Step right in there, and we'll be with you in a minute. That's the shrinking chamber. In moments, he'll be microscopic size. Hey, where's the head? Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... I think it's that door right there.

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"We're fighting for this woman's honor, which is probably more than she ever did." Groucho Marx

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 6 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

Well, that's done. He's in this little hypodermic needle. Hey, where's that monkey going? To the head. THAT'S NOT THE HEAD! THAT'S ANOTHER SHRINKING CHAMBER! (*THUNK!) All right, I'll get him out. Man, I gotta do everything myself around here. Ouch. Stepped on the goldurn hypodeemic nerdle.

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 7 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

Hey, I steered you wrong. On Iraq? I knew there were no WMD's there. No, this ain't the head. Well, you think I really care? I'm a monkey, for God's sake. You're lucky I'm not throwing it around. You know what I'm talking about. No, I mean it's a shrinking chamber. You'll be shrunk down and injected into Dick and-- uh oh.

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 8 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

You mind telling me what's going on? I just came here with Col. Jackson for a flight physical. I didn't expect the Cook's Tour of Dick's prostate. Me neither. They shrunk down the Colonel to fly this thing but then you went into another shrinking chamber and I went in to get you out and somehow we got onboard. And where is the Colonel? Dubya, this is Colonel Buck Jackson, USMC. Can you read me? AAAAAAAAAAHHH! I'M POSSESSED!!!!!

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 9 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

Dubya. Don't panic. This is Col. Buck Jackson. I'm a Marine fighter pilot. Somehow I ended up inside you. But I'm OK. I can talk you through this, and we can all get out alive.   ?   It's him! He musta gotten inside me when I stepped on that hyponeedledick dirndl. Snooky is an experienced test pilot and he will also be able to help you. Now, according to the records, you have some flight experience, right? Well, actually, turns out most of those records WERE faked.

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 10 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

Well, it won't be long now, as the actress said to the bishop. Hey, you're doing really well, Dubya! Well, flyin's like fallin' off a bike. You never forget how to do it. In fact, I'm thinkin' of draftin' some old WWI flying aces to fight in Iraq. Are you sure there's nobody else on this ship? My monkey sense is tingling. Of course not. Don't be stupid. This ship undergoes the same rigid security as our cargo ships. Yep, exactly what I was afraid of. No one move! I have boxcutter! I am hijacking this ship in the name of Allah!

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"We're fighting for this woman's honor, which is probably more than she ever did." Groucho Marx

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 11 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

So, Dubya. The irony is delicious, yes? You develop this technology to kill bin-Laden, and we turn it around on you to kill Dick. And now we get you, too. A twofer. Do I get double my frequent flyer miles? We will fly the ship right into Dick's heart! If we can hit it. It's a tiny target. HEY! THE LIGHTS! WHAT THE--! OW! OOCH! QUIT IT OUT!

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 12 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

Nice work. I think you got him. Hey, where's that monkey? No, Dubya. That was you. Me? My whole life, I never once beat anybody in a fair fight. I coldcocked a guy in rugby once, but...... Use the force, Dubya. OK, lock 'im in irons and throw 'im in the brig! Damn the torpedoes! Full speed ahead!

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 13 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

OK, coming up on the blockage. Death ray armed. OK, steady...... NO!!! FULL THROTTLE! REVERSE! OK! Reverse engaged! Full throttle! But why? THAT'S NO BLOCKAGE! What is it? IT'S A GAS BUBBLE! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 14 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

Whoa! Wha' happen? It's not a blockage! It's a gas bubble! If we don't outrun it, it's curtains! OK, steady on the throttle. I'll go check on our guest. OK. Looking for someone, monkey? Uh, oh.

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 15 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

Game over, monkey. Where is the captain's bridge? Well, if you must know, he usually keeps it in a glass of water on your wife's nightstand. I'm in no mood for jokes, monkey. You've certainly come to the right place. OK, it's through that door. Thanks, monkey. AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What a horrible way to die.

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"We're fighting for this woman's honor, which is probably more than she ever did." Groucho Marx

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 16 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

Buck, what's to become of us! I don't wanna die! Relax. As long as we outrun this thing, we'll be ok. Once we leave the body, we'll revert to normal size in due course. How are we going to leave the body? I don't wanna die, Buck! Get a grip. We can leave through any cavity, but in this case, the quickest way out is the anus. I guess there's worse things than dyin'.

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 17 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

Mrs. Cheney? Where's the patient? He had to use the little boys' room. NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! Man, I feel 10 lbs. lighter! It must have been those Applebee's riblets, Doc. I know I shouldn't have them, but who can resist all-you-can -eat for $9.95? Hey, if I was you, I wouldn't go in there.

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 18 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

AAAAAHHHHHHH!!! AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!! AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!! AAAAAAHHHH!! Whew! You ok? Yeah. Got the sniffles, though. Let's go to that house and dry off.

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage 19 by CHUBBY 2-06-05

Hey, it's the White House! I'm home! Hey, thanks for everything. You're a real good friend. Well, you know what they say. You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't wipe your friends off on your pants. Ah-- ah-- AHCHOOOOO!!! Well, I was wrong. I knew there was something you couldn't wipe off on your pants, I thought it was your friends.

Fantastic Innerspace Voyage FIN by CHUBBY 2-06-05

Secret Service! Freeze! Oh, it's you, Dubya. Thank goodness. Dick's been acting crazy. More than usual? Well, see for yourself. DEATH TO AMERICA! DEATH TO DUBYA! KILL THE JEWS! Honestly, I don't really see much difference.

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"We're fighting for this woman's honor, which is probably more than she ever did." Groucho Marx

CHUBBY I mean this as a fellow stripper when I say you expand into dialog too much. Keep it short, like BigEvilDan's cock.

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possible savior probable SEX MACHINE

#12 has potential
#1 and #9 are funny, but need work
#4 is actually pretty good as it is
The rest are pretty boring.

Your problem is that you go off on these huge narratives which try to tell a complicated story. Your stories are usually interesting, but they're more than you can really accomplish with the art and format limitations on this site. What you end up with is long rambling set-up for a relatively small number of jokes.

What you really need is comicbookcreator.com. Or just to draw these things out.

If you must try these long stories, at least try to put a joke in every comic to keep it from getting boring and annoying the reader. You can further a plot and still keep the funny flowing, you know.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

I try to give each strip a ending that is either a.) a cliffhanger or b.) funny, at least in the context of the series. Also, I try to make each series stand alone, but most of them are interlinked. This is a prequel to THE SON ALSO RISES, and SEALAB 2021 is a sequel to TSAR, which also spunoff THE $10K MARTINI and its sequels. Knowledge of a series' forerunners may enhance one's enjoyment. Or not.

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"We're fighting for this woman's honor, which is probably more than she ever did." Groucho Marx

If erection lasts for more than four hours, call a doctor immediately.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com