Cop y Cat by biped 7-04-05

And you say you witnessed the entire incident? That's right, officer. Every word of my account has been completely accurate. How do you figure that you can talk in the first place? I mean, you're a cat. Hmm...I can't really explain it, officer. In fact, I never even thought about it until just now. And just why should I believe you? I have no way of knowing how trustworthy the word of a cat is. I only lie to mice, officer, when I tell them: "Come here, little mouse...I won't eat you."

Cop y Cat 2 by biped 7-04-05

*squeak* *squeak* Come here, little mouse... I won't eat you. GULP! Mmm. ...down to the station to sign a statement. I'm sorry, officer. What did you say?

Cop y Cat 3 by biped 7-04-05

I sense the presence of mice in this building. Yeah, yeah...mice... big problem. Wait here while I get the chief. I wish they had magazines in here, I --oh, my. *squeak* *squeak* I lied to three mice while you were away, officer. Yeah, great...well, the chief just fired me for bringing a cat in to make a statement.

Cop y Cat 4 by biped 7-04-05

Well, now I can be a sidewalk quick-portrait artist like I always wanted. Oh, would you draw a portrait of me, please? Sure, here you go. How do you like it? Oh, heh, it's good, little mou -- err, police officer. It's very good. *squeak* *squeak*

Cop y Cat 5 by biped 7-04-05

The chief says you can come back to work if you're all over this "talking cat" thing. Oh, good. Let me go tell the cat. Okay, I -- hello?

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Cop y Cat 6 by biped 7-04-05

I've never done anything like this before. I hope I can get the hang of it. Oh, I'm sure you'll do fine. I'll just stand over there and observe for awhile. DO YOU SEE STUFFED MEATBALLS ON THE MENU, YOU SLIMY LITTLE PUNK? NOW GET YOUR DUMB ASS OUT OF HERE OR I'LL RUN YOU IN!!! Eh...ehh.. WAAAAAAAAAA-HAAAAA-HAAAAAAAAAAA!!! I didn't handle that well, did I? It doesn't matter. He ran out into the street and got run over by a dump truck.

Cop y Cat 7 by biped 7-04-05

I hate to disturb your meal, commissioner, but I'd like to intercede on behalf of my friend, Officer -- You -- you're a TALKING CAT! So the stories are TRUE! Yes, they are. He never lies, sir...and neither do I. Well, except to mice, when I tell them, "Come here, little mouse...I won't eat you." So, you're saying he's completely sane? Completely, utterly, unconditionally sane? Oh, heh...of course he is, little mou -- I mean, commissioner. He is totally sane. *squeak* *squeak*

Cop y Cat 8 by biped 7-04-05

I, uh...I sorta wanted to see, err, your new partner...the talking cat...heh... We're busy, Firkins. Get lost. The suspect broke down and confessed, Bill. The "good cat, bad cop" routine worked again. Well, let's call it a day. I hear the dinner bell ringing. Welcome to Pets-R-Us! Can I help you? Yes, I'd like a bag of your most gullible mice, please.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Great series.

Thank you kindly, good sir.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

I enjoyed them as well. Talking cats always tickle my funny bone... among other *ahem* parts of my body.

You mean, like, your dick?

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Best cop movie co-starring a cat I have ever seen!

****

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I will rate you hard, and unendingly.

Well worth reading--especially for the final punchline.

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Chicken Feather Bed Bugs Bunny Hop Sing Out Side Street Walker Texas Ranger Cookie Dough Boy Wonder Years

Thank you for the nice comments.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

ObiJo-esque.

that last one was great.

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-=- You eat one lousy foot and they call you a cannibal. What a world. -=-

biped truly is Mr. Wonderful.

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

In my head, the cat has a british accent.

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Mediocrity at its most average.

I didn't get why people started squeaking when the cat lied to them. Other than that, I found this series most tittilating.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

He was imagining them to be mice so that he wouldn't feel so bad about lying to them. I had a little trouble conveying that.

Thanks for the comments, everyone!

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.