To say I love you.

All of you. Thanks for being the classy bunch that you are. It's been a fun (almost)five years and I just gotta say, the book is coming along nicely and when it's finished I'm gonna send brad a copy. It couldn't have happened without any of you. You all mean alot to me.

Keep on keepin' on.

Agronaut City by crabby 6-05-06

I'm still bitter. Look buddy, just let it go.

Lately, I've Had a Rough Case of the Blues by crabby 6-05-06

Sometimes I wonder if it's really all that great to be a real citizen. I became a US citizen 15 years ago. No one gives a shit. I don't know. They all throw feces at my home and burn Saudi flags. I'm from Istanbul. It just isn't worth the trouble. I can't even cook.

Commercial Idea to be remembered at a later date by crabby 6-05-06

How much? I want you to hold your ear out and listen to how much it costs. Sounds great! You better believe it. What a deal! I would never let you down sir.

Cactus by crabby 6-05-06

Go ahead.... I want you to cover your eyes and then cover your nuts.

- by crabby 6-05-06

So Kurt Angle is gonna fight Randy Orton at ONS. Which of them was ever in ECW? Well, Angle was gonna be in ECW, but he witnessed a crucifixtion angle and left. Angle didn't like the angle? He hated it. Randy Orton is such a fag.

Nothing?

Cactus is a work of art.

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I has a flavor!

Whats the book about?

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The following statement its true. The previous statement is false

It's about my adventures on this message board. I'm basically converting all the gossip and back stabbing into literary form to be read by a wider audfience. You will all be cleverly renamed. For instance, instead of 'the_young_scot' you might be renamed to, 'my_old_shoe.'

I found these to be either confusing or blatantly bad. Except for "Commercial Idea," which for some reason I found to be straight-up hilarious.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

YOU'RE OUT OF THE BOOK!

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what if nigger meant kite

Work by crabby 8-11-06

The other day at work I was in the bathroom jerking off and taking a shit and the boss actually knocked on the door and said he wanted to talk to me when I was finished. How did the boss know you were jerking off? He didn't he just wanted to know if I could help another guy move a file cabinet. He knocked on the bathroom door to tell you that? Yeah! What a prick. I told him I wasn't moving shit cause I have back problems. That's the same thing I told my boss when he tried to have anal sex with me.

Lessons Learned by crabby 8-01-06

The other day me and the wife were fighting and I sort of held her down and pined her arms back and started working a finger into her asshole. Not like, IN HER ASSHOLE, but over the pants. At one point she literally started crying. Why are you telling me this? I couldn't think of a better ice breaker for the "If you ever fuck my wife I'll kill you with my bare hands" lecture.

hangin' out by crabby 8-01-06

All we ever do is sit here and play videogames. I wish she would make a move and suck my dick so I don't have to put my heart out on the line. All he ever does is play video games. I wish he would pay more attention to me. Hey do you wanna do something else babe? No, you play your games! It's ok baby! All we ever do is sit here and play videogames. I wish she would make a move and suck my dick so I don't have to put my heart out on the line. All he ever does is play video games. I wish he would pay more attention to me.

The Truth About Foster Homes by crabby 5-21-06

You can't hit me dad, I'll call the cops. They'll just put you in a foster home. Yeah, but at least they wouldn't hit me. They most certainly will, they'll probably also force you to have sex with other foster children for their amusement. I bet you'd wanna watch you dirty pedophile. For the last time, you can't prove that the people in that movie weren't 18.

BTTW: Public Broadcasting Services. by crabby 6-21-05

I'm just a high school kid. I don't know the first thing about the proper procedure for the pull out method. You make me sick. Didn't you read any of the literature I gave you? That was a biblical pamphlet that you picked up from a deranged homeless person. He told me his name was Stan Howten and I must become impregnated with a child. Thats disturbing!

l00l l00l

The Truth about Foster Homes and Lessons Learned were both f00kin great

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what if nigger meant kite

I heart crabby.

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

HAHA! loved those last few comic!

Now I really want to read that book.

I hope I have superpowers in it....

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The following statement its true. The previous statement is false

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That is good, heart-wrenching stuff.

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Ham-fisted ham fisting.