FTC Panel

You can't keep me in here without any evidence! Hey elfcock, how about not making me beat the shit out you?

by LuckyGuess, 9-23-06

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the kid's getting old, the kid's getting old

What amazing entries. This gonna be tough to judge.

Alright, here is an alternate FTC panel, sice that other one isn't that poular. You can add dialog in for the second guy in the first panel, as well.

FTC Replacement Panel

I wish we had more female employees.

by LuckyGuess, 9-27-06

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the kid's getting old, the kid's getting old

i plan on posting an entry, lucky, but i've been so busy i can't even drink myself into a stupor....

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Kill Whitey.

The Fuck We Can't by boloboffin 9-27-06

You can't keep me in here without any evidence! Hey elfcock, how about not making me beat the shit out you? You can't convict me without any evidence! Hey elfcock, how about not making me beat the shit out you? You can't execute me without any evidence! To the bitter end, eh, elfcock?

Sorry, Lucky.

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

Santa's little smuggler by AngryAmerican 9-27-06

You can't keep me in here without any evidence! Hey elfcock, how about not making me beat the shit out of you? I didn't DO anything! What about the 3 lbs. of plastic explosives shaped like a barbie doll? Um...that was for recreational use? Charlie, I'm gonna need the leg irons and your nightstick...

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Kill Whitey.

There are two paths you can go by, but in the long run...

Nice, AA.

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

FTC 94: A Fictional Conversation by biped 9-28-06

I wish we had more female employees. I wish you'd stop humping me in the ass every time I bend over. -----------------------wait for it------------------------- Well, I would if we had more female employees.

FTC 94: The Conroy Gambit by biped 9-28-06

You can't keep me in here without any evidence! Hey elfcock, how about not making me beat the shit out you? But I'm NOT an elf! I...I'm WADE CONROY! WADE CONROY? OH, MY GOD! I'M SORRY, MR. CONROY! RELEASE THIS MAN! But honest, officer! I'm Wade Conroy! WADE CONROY! SHUT UP, you big, fat LIAR ELF!!!

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

And The Two Become One by boloboffin 9-28-06

I wish we had more female employees. Hey elfcock, how about not making me beat the shit out you? Whaaa? Goddammit, you asked for it. Hey, Suzie? Could you get in here and clean up this mess?

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

this disturbed me for like, 5 seconds.

the other martial art... by AngryAmerican 9-28-06

I wish we had more female employees. Bill, you're a registered sex offender, its not a good idea to let people hear you making statements like that. But I can't help it if i just loved a duct-taped woman. There's something about a helpless bitch taped to a school desk I just can't get enough of. Bill, there are some people who would say you need to be locked up forever. I'm misunderstood. Underneath their ball gags, they're screaming for more. I'm a ninth degree balck belt in Rape-Fu. Teach me, oh Master.

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Kill Whitey.

CC... by crackpanther 9-29-06

You can't keep me in here without any evidence! Hey elfcock, how about not making me beat the shit out of you? And since when do overdue library books make me a war criminal? Statutes of limitation ain't in my job description. I just teach the German Shepards to ass-rape.

Alright, it's been a week. Time for divine judgement!

Runner ups are-
biped's The Conroy Gambit
AngryAmerica's the other martial art...
crackpanther's ...

However, the first entry won me over with the line, "To the bitter end, eh elfcock?" so for that boloboffin takes the win with "The Fuck We Can't."

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the kid's getting old, the kid's getting old