Ask Paul

So far, my interview with Paul has gone pretty much like this:

"Have you ever had sex with a water buffalo?"
"I don't understand the question."

"What does Ringo's big toe taste like?"
"That's a silly question, and I can't answer that."

"How many lobotomies have you had?"
"NO! I can't answer that. Next question, please."

"Why are you such a big, fat idiot?"
"I don't know. I don't know the answer. In fact, I've now got a nervous twitch because of that question."

"Why do all of your solo album after Ram suck?"
(grabs guitar and sings) "I don't know...the answer to that question...the answer to that question...I don't know."

"Well, thanks for the I Don't Know song."
"Play you a song? How about one off the new album? I've got the very one. (grabs guitar) In the key of A. (plays)

"Are you really dead?"
"I'm sorry, I don't understand that question. Next?"

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Ask him how many varlets he has slain in single combat.
What's that Paul? None?
Oh, OK so I guess you'll be turning in that phony knighthood thing they gave you for being rich.

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

Paul IS dead.  You can't convince me that the same man who wrote "For No One" also wrote "Silly Love Songs," "Say Say Say," and "Press."

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I has a flavor!

P.S.  My theory is that he died and was replaced by Peter Noone, who was replaced by Freddie from Freddie & the Dreamers, who was replaced by somebody's grandmother.

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I has a flavor!

I asked him how big his penis is and he told me what music he's listening to.

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Poop.

I asked him about John Lennon. He had a blank. He had no clue. I asked him who was the Walrus. Complete blank.

Finally, I asked him if he missed John. He is still, STILL, talking about how Wings was formed as a band. So I guess that is the answer to that question.

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

He wont divulge his plans for time travel. What's he hiding?!?

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The following statement its true. The previous statement is false

I asked him "What is the Matrix?"  and the browser crashed.

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Please replace the handset, and try again.

Rabid_Weasle

I don't know about you, but my penis is Justin Timberlake inches long.

paul mcartney's a cunt. the beatles's sucked. accept it you cum covered snizz-flap.

seriously, if you like the beatles, your taste in music is a jizz flavored popsicle laced with scrotal tissue, you piece of shit.

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Kill Whitey.

How's that job of yours going?

quote:

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paul mcartney's a cunt. the beatles's sucked. accept it you cum covered snizz-flap.

seriously, if you like the beatles, your taste in music is a jizz flavored popsicle laced with scrotal tissue, you piece of shit.

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And how can you tell if a popsicle is indeed jizz-flavored?

Feed it to AngryAmerican's mom!

ZING!

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Ham-fisted ham fisting.

AngryAmerican

And we love you too.

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I will rate you hard, and unendingly.

I asked him if he'd ever go down on one knee again.

 He said 'I'd rather you called her Heather.'

I asked if he could play the tuba and he went and got a guitar and played a song. I still want to know if he can play the tuba. I find Paul McCartney evasive and very suspicious really.

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What others say about boorite!

Sh-yeah... the tube-steak tuba.

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.