CC 126 Intro by BigEvilDan 6-18-02

The test results are in, Bongo. You only have 72 hours to live. Oh my god. I need to get a life while I still can.

That's right, Bongo is dying. Your job is to write a comic, or series of comics, showing how he's going to spend his last days on earth. Will he live life to it's fullest, struggle to find a cure or just run around in a panic?

Multiple entries are encouraged, and the contest ends roughly 72 hours after this gets posted.

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III

CC 126: Life, in hell by Bazilla 6-18-02

I have 72 hours to live! This is my life! In hell! Yeah, Death got bored and made you come in early. But there's so much stuff I didn't get to do! Yeah, you must be pretty gutted!

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I am not 16 going on not 17, I know that I'm naive.

CC 126: Self-fulfilling Prophecy by kaufman 6-18-02

6 hours after the diagnosis ... No protection? Ok, I can do you that way, but it will cost you an additional $800. I don't care. Doctor says I've only got three days to live. Money means nothing to me. 70 hours after the diagnosis ... And what can I do for you today? Doctor, I've been puking my guts out and craving ice cream. What could be the matter? A bit later ... Hey, Doc, are you sure you got that diagnosis right? It's been over 71 hours, and I still feel fine. Listen, Bongo. I need your help on a little pregnancy test ...

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

CC126 by flickguy 6-18-02

Two-fifty?

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This is not my empire.

Bongo Finds Out That He's Going To Die by TheElPaso 6-18-02

Bongo Finds Out That He's Going To Die by TheElPaso 6-18-02

Bongo Finds Out That He's Going To Die by TheElPaso 6-18-02

Bongo Finds Out That He's Going To Die by TheElPaso 6-18-02

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My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in. -Weird Al Yankovic

You Kant put Descartes before the horse by ObiJo 6-18-02

Good news. Oh thank god. You're dying. How is that good news! It's all very existential.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Kaufman would be proud of that title.

Personally, I despise you even more for it.

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

Me too.

Oh that Pete by ObiJo 6-18-02

I heard you were so sorry. If there's please don't dying, Bongo. I'm anything I can do, hesitate to ask. Thanks for the card, Pete. You bet. And just think of it this way: we're all dying. You're just doing it first and missing out on a bunch of stuff the rest of us will see. Thanks again, Pete. I mean, think about it! Ten years ago no one knew what the internet was! Just imagine what the next 10 years have to hold!

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

If anyone has their browser options set to ignore font size specified by webpages, I'd just like to point out that the first panel makes complete sense and you must be developing a brain tumor.

On a happy note, though, that should provide ample motivation for this contest! Woohoo!

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Disclaimer: I'd have never done this if wirthling hadn't waved that red flag in front of me.

Cogito Ergo Pun by kaufman 6-18-02

How does this happen to what seems to be your run-of-the-Mill healthy rabbit who plays Socrates up golf balls, and succeeds at other Rand-om physical activities? Don't tell that the Hume-an condition is to be as sturdy as Plato, and our deaths Aristotally arbitrary and Locked in as it seems. We need to Kierkegaard our sanity. How Dewey resolve the fact that our Nietzche in society is about to become vacant by this Sartrifact of our mortality? How can people let the end knOccam down?

Instead I'd probably have paid tribute to the "Kiww da Wabbit" theme from "What's Opera Doc" and done one with a bunch of opera titles.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Oh don't you even dare trying to blame that atrocity on me, you bastard.

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

Its all your fault. You suck!

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

My first comic EVER.

Proper Death Etiquette by rickward 2-22-01

Bongo...your time has come... LOOK AT ME WHEN I'M TALKING TO YOU! That's better.

Thoughtcrime by rickward 2-26-01

I'm scared... What if there's a mind-reading invisible boogeyman standing right in front of me getting ready to eat me? Ummm...I'm really tough and chewy, and I taste like poop. Damn

OK, so the second one's not about death per se, but it's funny and it has Bongo in it.

But Doctor, I am Pagliacci! by rickward 6-18-02

Hey Mr. Clown, cheer me up, will ya? Okay, here goes... You know what's funny? Nothing you say or do can stop you from dying in three days. THAT'S funny. HAW! HAW! HAW!

cc 126: Occam's razor by lara7 6-18-02

You have contracted a flesh-eating virus on your penis. If we don't amputate it, you will die in 72 hours. What if we do amputate? Oh, then you'll live at -least- 96 hours, possibly up to160! That's all? What kind of life is that? Well, at least then you'd have a few more days to spend with your wife. I hate you, Doctor Benway.

cc 126: Occam's razor (continued) by lara7 6-18-02

So, what should I do? Die on my feet, or live a few extra hours on my knees? Are you coming on to me?

cc 126: Occam's razor (continued) by lara7 6-18-02

After seeking counsel from his friend, Bongo returns home. sigh. Andy was no help. I still don't know what to do. after the explanation... Well, honey, I'll support whatever you choose to do. Really? I was thinking I'd go out with a bang by calling in some whores... That's not exactly what I meant, honey.

cc 126: Occam's razor (continued) by lara7 6-19-02

The next day, 3pm: Are you up for a party? Sure....$50. 8pm: Up for a party? eh, I guess I'll do it for $75. 3am: Up for a party? A party? Will there be clowns and games and cake?

cc 126: Occam's razor (finale) by lara7 6-19-02

The day after... Where have you been? I've been worried sick! What did you decide to do about the operation? Well, funny thing... I don't have to worry about it. What are you talking about? Uh, after yesterday, it kinda...fell off by itself.

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When they invent BookFace, I'm -there-.

Oddly inspired

CC 126: Pretend the first panel split doesn't exist by Ranma_X. 6-18-02

Oh god, What am I gonna do? I can't just stand here, I have only 72 hours isn't a lot of time, I have to think. Think! God dammit man, think! What do I want to do with the rest of my short life... *HONK HONK* Watch out!!!! Damn. I missed the bus.

CC 126: Death is Patient with Bongo by Ranma_X. 6-18-02

Oh god, 72 hours. There's so much I've wanted to do. Like eat at Hardees one more time and watch 'Attack of the Killer Tromatoes' while scratching myself Then staring longinly at George Clooney and... *Ahem* I'm waiting

CC 126: Bongo is a Broken Record by Ranma_X. 6-18-02

Gotta run! Gotta find a life! Gotta run! Gotta find a life! Gotta run! Gotta find a life! Gotta run! Gotta find a life! Oh, hey Jesus, didn't see you there. Um, Bongo, there's something I've been meaning to tell you...

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-working towards a worse tomorrow.

CC 126: The Eternal Question by israphael 6-19-02

72 hours! There is so much I still want to do. What shall I do with my remaining time? I've always wanted to read "Moby Dick". Or maybe go to Yellowstone and commune with nature? Perhaps I should spend my last moments surrounded by family and friends. Who will be cut next on Elimi-date? I hope the beer and chips hold out.

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

Death Comes For Us All by Namgubed 6-19-02

Well, I see my time on this earth is almost up, but I'm afraid I will never have shared a truly intimate communion with someone special ... Of course, Bongo, I understand. Sure enough ... So ... how much for the both of us?

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"There's no point in beating a dead horse ... except, of course, for the pure joy of it." - A. Whitney Brown

Honourable mentions:

kaufman - Self-fulfilling Prophecy

TheElPaso - Bongo Finds Out That He's Going To Die

ObiJo - Bongo Finds Out That He's Going To Die

kaufman (with special thanks to wirthling) - Cogito Ergo Pun

israphael - The Eternal Question

And the winner...

lara7 - Occam's razor

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III

Congratulations, Seven of lara.

Even though TheElPaso called me fatso in another thread, and I cried, oh how I cried, I thought his series was profound. I had a thought for an Unfunny Contest, where the goal was to make the reader feel some emotion OTHER than laughter. TheElPaso's series probably would have won that contest.

But he can still go fuck a cactus for making me leak saline solution.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Yes, I considered this the last time a ran a contest. I've even wanted to just make a serious series for no reason. But I just haven't ever got round to it.

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Dad was flammable

Lara's off having an interesting life, damn her.

I guess this is a safety break.

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What others say about boorite!

quote:

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Lara's off having an interesting life, damn her.

I guess this is a safety break.

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fuck! I meant "write", not right.

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When they invent BookFace, I'm -there-.