All comics by SinatraFonzarelli2

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[CONTRIVED PLOT INVOLVING NINJAS NO ONE'S LISTENING TO BECAUSE THEY'RE TOO STONED AND TOO BUSY JACKING OFF TO CARE]
*TENTACLE RAPE*
*TENTACLE RAPE*
*GRATUITOUS PANTY SHOT*
We must have lesbian sex to save the day!

 

I'll catch you, roadrunner!
Meep-meep
Because I'm on drugs
Why are you chasing me, Wile E. Coyote?
or tobacoo or caffeine!
Don't you know drugs are bad? Drugs killed Jesus! And if you smoke marijuana, you'll be a Satanic Leftist hippie like Charles Manson. You should stick to good wholesome legal drugs, like Prozac!

 

[IN UPPER EARTH (about five miles from Middle Earth)
Roar!
Shit! It's that fuck Morgoth! I guess we have to duel now..
That's right, bitch!
I've been killed!
Now...Upper Earth's only hope...is the prophesized ones. *dies*
.........I'm going to rape your corpse.

 

Gandalf the Grey has been killed!
So? He was a cunt.
We must summon the power of the Prophesized Ones!
WONDERTWIN POWERS ACTIVATE!
Form of an elephant!
Shape of some frozen guy!

 

The Prophesized Ones!
I'm Nevin Zehr! First member of the Prophesized Ones! My techniques include ultra-cereal eating, super-sleeping past noon, giga-watching Comedy Central, and omega-pounding nails in my head
I'm Sean Landis! My super powers include listening to J-Pop and sharpening my oriental weapons all day!
G'day, old spice! My name is say! I really have a girlfriend! Also, I work for Nintendo and they're making a secret Donkey Kong game that I know about because I'm psychic and cool.
I'm Flip! There are many evils in this world! Like Simpsons-watching pinkos and Feminazi hippies that take PMS pills that they secretly get high off of (Also they worship Satan via recycling)
I'm Brad, creator of StripCreator. Due to excessive crack-smoking, I'm comletly ematiated. I also have an addiction to the flesh of babies.
[Arabic dialogue] Me name is "bald guy speaking Arabic in the M&Ms commercial [Arabic dialogue]

 

More Prophesized Ones that we forgot about earlier
OMG I RYAN I DONT APAR TAHT MUC N NEVINS COMICS SO I BICH ABUT IT OMG TEH MATRICKS SI CONFORMIST!
The Balrogs are a corner-stone in the malevolent ubiquitous omnipotent army of Al-Quida. (Note: Bush's vocabulary isn't this big. This is poetic license)
I am the dark lord Cthulhu! I have no real reason for appearing in this comic!
I'm Hitler the 3rd! Old man Zenigata will never catch me!
OMG I OSK OMG OMG I LUV ADULT SWIM ADULT SWIM SI GAY I LOEV ANIME SIT R0x0r I HAET ANIME OMG JAPS SUX0R STRIPCREATOR SI GAE I MAED 50 KOMICS ON IT!!!11
I'm Asian girl one. I have no personality.

 

Where are the prophesized ones?
They all died in a plane crash on their way over here.
Oh, so we're fucked then
Essentially.
THE END OF EPIC SAGA
*KILLED BY MORGOTH*
*KILLED BY MORGOTH*

 

Rush Limbaugh's short-lived career as an ESPN Sportscaster
Hello, this is ESPN. I'm Fred Smith.
And I'm a set of breasts who's an object.
Rush Limbaugh's short-lived career as an ESPN Sportscaster
We now take you live, to the The Super Dome, where correspondant Rush Limbaugh is standing by.
I pour rich delicious Coors on my breasts.
[LIVE FROM THE SUPER DOME]
Hail Hitler.

 

Father!
?
I've finally found my long-lost father!
Shit.
Boy, that long-lost daughter made a delicious goolash.

 

At DNR headquarters
Nevin wrote another letter to the editor
Oh, but he used the word "raped". If we printed that, it'd offend baby Jesus.
I know, let's change it so it says "ripped".
That's retarded.
In other words, it's brilliant. Let's do it.

 

Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas!
I'm Jewish

 

I thought you died in a plane crash.
We survived it, only to be stranded in an icy mountain. I had to cannibalize all the other prophesized ones to survive.
Oh.
I have a problem...

 

I thought you died in a plane crash.
We survived it, only to be stranded in an icy mountain. I had to cannibalize all the other prophesized ones to survive.
Oh.
I have a problem...
This comic sucked to begin with. It was a waste of time fixing it.

 

Please ignore my last two comics. I messed them both up, and they don't make any sense.
I was drunk
It's all my fault, kids. I'm so much of a greedy bastard that people can't delete comics unless they donate to the site.

 

Due to lack of comic ideas, I'm making this one entirely dependent on my comedic crutches: Religious blasphemy!
We have homosexual sex.
You're so impotent, Jesus.
Retarded parody
OMG OMG TEH ENTIRE WORDLS FAEK OMG LETS DOGE BULETS N SLOW MOSHUN
OMG IM THE ORACLE IM BLACK AND DEAD [RACISM]
Flip or SSS/DKvine insults
WE SUCK!1
OMG INDEED!!1

 

At McDonalds, home of the hamburger vagina
Can I get a cheeseburger?
No.
Why not?
Because I'm a racist.
[DEALING WITH DELICATE SOCIAL JUSTICE ISSUES!!!11]
Racists are fucktards! >:O

 

August 4th, 2003; Nevin's house
OMG FLCL SI GOD OMG OMG TSI R0x0R!!!!!!!!1
*FLCL*
*Has an orgasm from watching FLCL*
Up next...Blue Gender!
It would be in one of the sketches of the newspaper of the week of August, therefore sugerizia of I he he it search, because it is of the right, poichè that is the life.
...that's it?
*BLUE GENDER*

 

This time it's for real
I thought you died in a plane crash.
We survived it, only to be stranded in an icy mountain. I had to cannibalize all the other prophesized ones to survive.
Oh
I have a problem...

 

Nevin's Dad: Nevin, I need you to do some work.
I can't. I'm lazy. It's a serious handicap. Why don't you respect that?
That's it. I'm selling you to the Amish.
These comics are really starting to suck.
*IS NEVIN*
We can't do a fucking thing with him.

 

At the Harvard admissions office
What qualifications do you have for Harvard university, Mr. Zehr?
RARSMALLOW RIECES!~
I once made 109 StripCreator comics.
Welcome to the Ivy League!

 

At the Oil Tycoon's house
Why should I make you air to the IraqiBlood Inc. throne?
Well, I have a Harvard graduation.
Meh.
I made 110 StripCreator comics.
Good God! You're much more fit to run this company! I'm retiring immediately!

 

At the Tokyo airport
Why should I let you live in Japan? You're obviously shit-poor
Actually I'm a wealthy oil tycoon with a Harvard graduation.
So?
I made 111 StripCreator comics.
Fuck me now!

 

 

I made this comic on AOL version 4.0, so if it fucks up, that's why
For breakfast today, I had a pile of raw festering buffalo meat drowning in a puddle of oil-based yellow American cheese with a deep-fried panda on the side..oh, and a sports figure on the box.
What did you have?
The same thing, only it had a bun
Hungry Man: Because everything else is for homosexuals without penises
You actually ate a plant product? You transexual!
*DIES OF MAL-NUTRITION AND AIDS FROM BEING A GAY*

 

A day in the life
I HAVE SEX WITH HALO!!!!!1
OMG HALO SUKS B CUZ IM SUCH A NONCONFORMIST AND IT HAS GUNS AND TEH ARMY!!!1
FUCK FUCK IM DRY AND SUBVERSIVE!!!1 *INSERT LAME SARCASTING ZING THAT HE THINKS IS FUNNY*
OMG WELL TEH HORWSE KALED ND TI WANTS SI ASS BACK>..WICH SI YOU!!11
OMG U SUK AT TIS!!!!1
YSE

 

I'm Sean's sister. I'm talking to him from my friend's house.
Nevin's friend Sean's sister's friend's stepfather: His buddy icon says "fuck"! As a Nazi, that offends me! I'll have to report it to AOL.
They won't give a fuck.
Ten minutes later
*Talking on the phone*...and it said it in a bold green font!
Sir, we don't give a fuck. We're too busy making shitty commercials that exploit Gregorian monks.

 

The kid from Yu-Yu Hakusho vs. the orphan from Inuyasha: Two epic powers collide
You and I are like blood and water! Let us settle this legendary rivalry with a duel to the death!
The battle will be a Psionic one fought on the Plane of Xargoth
BEGIN FIGHT!
Worst comic ever
*RUNS OUT INTO STREET AND IS HIT BY RED CONVERTABLE*
*IS KICKED TO DEATH BY VIOLENT VILLAGERS*

 
No, wait, this is the worst comic ever
*THE OIL AND FAT IN HIS MONICLE COMBUST, CATCHING HIM ON FIRE*

 

My name is...my name is Ben...well not to say that I was christened Ben, well you see, well you see, about that...well..umm..it's
Curlilocks!
It's well that I'm not actually Benjamin, but Benny, but if you were to call me Benny it would be as if, um..well to be honest, I well, to tell you the truth it's...um...well...
See that snake on your shirt!
Well, to say that, per se, if you were to, well, if to tell you the truth if Ozma of Oz and Bilbo Baggins got in a fight, well, er...umm...well it's *picks nose*
My mother paid an assassin to kill me!

 

Seinfeld!!!11 *Dances to Seinfeld theme
*Dun daw dun dun daw dun*
Nevin, your family has committed you to a mental institution for sitcom-related hysteria
I'll get you for this, Jerry Seinfeld!

 

Niles would subdue you, Nevin's mom!
*THE RABBI IN THIS COMIC IS PLAYED BY AN AMISHMAN BECAUSE FUCK BRAD* Dear exonerated and honorable President Bush
Don't miss the new "Charmed!" tonight! Orgies of Special Magnificence!
As the silent minority of Anti-Zionist Jews, I think it would benefit both the Jewish and Palestinian people if you refrained from using the terms "Judaism" and "Zionism" synonymously...
"I have up your pussy for Frasier"
...and I believe that the malevolent Zionist regime is the antithesis of the Jewish people. For more information, visit www.jewsagainstzionism.com
Eat some damn pork you fucking yid!

 

In Tim's room, Tim examine's his character sheet
*Jacking off* My wizard can do fireball!
My wizard can do fireball! My wizard can do fireball! My wizard can do fireball! MY WIZARD CAN DO FIREBALL!!!1
OH GOD YES! *Ejaculates* FIREBALL!!!@

 

A normal day in Israel; In a Jerusalem coffee house
I'm urinating pure coffee
Palestinian terrorist: *Blows her up with fertilizer bombs*
Oh my fucking God! I'm white and rich and slightly injured in some way! Slaughter thousands of people to compensate for the horrible trauma I'm feeling, government!
*UNBRIDLED BLATANT POLITICAL RHETORIC*
*BAM BAM BAM* You're obviously part of a subversive plot to hurt the poor Jews and I'm shooting you with a gun that dooesn't exist because Kaddar didn't give me one.
*PALESTINIAN BABY*

 

In the dungeon
Nevin: *Attempt to roleplay is thwarted by own non-charisma and comrades' torpid prattle*
Sean: IM A MONK WHICH MEANS I CAN DO KUNG FU!!!!1 *Asiatic Kung-Fu noises*
Tim: I CAN DO FIREBALL I MEMORIZED IT TEN TIMES TODAY DOES THIS SCENARIO NEED A FIREBALL? BECAUSE I CAN PROVIDE ONE!!
I'm going to make a perform che...
YOU DO NOTHING BECAUSE WHATEVER YOU DO WILL BE OVER-SHADOWED BY THE EPIC MIGHT AND USEFULNESS OF FIREBALL!!!!1
Kevin: I...I'm a Cleric.

 
*RAPES*
*RAPED*

 

But I have no money to pay for this space-pizza!
Oh, I'll think of a way for you to pay it off
*unzips space-suit*
*unzips space-suit*

 

 

I've come for your soul!
Oh please! Not now! I have so much to live for! Isn't there anything I can do to make you spare my life?
Well...
*suck suck*

 
Comic Contests are inane.

 

zacarias_es_comico gives some constructive criticism
Your comics simply aren't funny.
Did I mention I have five comics, no one's ever read them, and they're all jingoistic Saddam Hussein sodomy jokes?
These comics are getting less and less subtle.

 

Do you want to make a donation to StripCreator?
No.

 

Schlong added me to his favorite authors.
Schlong is pretty fucking awesome.
Indeed.

 

Dear Editor...to all the Nevin Zehrs out there. When this country was founde over 200 years ago, every single inhabitant spoke English. White Anglo-Saxons are the rightful owners of this land.
It's not my fault that you're a nigger-loving communist who hates Jesus. Everyone must conform to my beliefs and customs because I'm too mentally retarded to understand theirs.
Why is it inethical to guard boarders with armed guards? The government says it isn't, therefore it isn't. Utterly perfect logic. God Bless the USA. God Bless the USA. Sincerely, Buck Rexrode.

 

Cream your Khakis, not Iraqis.
Middle English frenetik, from Old French frenetique, from Latin phrenticus, from Greek phrentikos, from phrentis, brain disease, from phrn, mind. See gwhren- in Indo-European Roots.]
About last night, I have some of your pubic hair in my teeth.
AKWARD SILENCE
"Hail Hitler"~Plugged In magazine

 

Hey, wanna hear a joke I heard?
Alright
Why did the dwarf cross the road?
Hmmn...
Because I slept with your wife!

 

Simultaneously... in outside Detroit's secret facility....
The newest result is in gentleman. The strip causes other readers to obtain.
Felkins, I am very much disappointed. Korporative promotion was assumes, in order to let these chaps suffer not to follow.
I cannot understand it everyone, Sir.
Wells fortunately for you, we heard somewhat straight recently of our surveillence crew, which frightened and fear and disorder will cause to all. This tears the bases up of the strip....
Like that it is with large expectations that I mean entry into California choice announce. And Oh, Charlene is more schwanger
Verfluchtes straight.

 

look for those for a verworrenen island recovery place, in which one leftist cat as I the attention to be received can, it wish. Do you know, what I mean? * would sign *
I have fear that I do Sir. Be moveable me arising contents filter and the examination for you away around.
You did not see to I somewhere you brightly before.
Purhaps in its dreams, Sir. OH -! I found the perfect point. I announce you immediately!
Splinter-sound more catch! What do you do from the Brig? I must chain you above, until we reach the island!
If you had larger chests, this would be perfect!

 

In order. Superman NR. 1, explains to me, what I carry?
They carry hooded a red sweatshirt and bleached beige Jeans.
They carry that equipment announced old navy incessantly last month.
Thankses, Superman NR. 2. And NR. 3, similar question.
A white bra and a red cotton-hip-high Schluepfer.
IT IS THAT ONE!

 

...by umfumdisi
Oh Cher, I ask you to give me the strength to more makeover this course wreck of a man.
Are you strange? BRAAAAAAP!
Six months of late (after Liposuction, Detox, a klemmstelle And a bar and a small point o Botox)...
Possibly I went a traditional tad too...
Do they continue in Sodom?
Here you take my jacket... equip a smidge. OH -, you are hotter than bum bullfighters!
I feel like bowls you.

 

Chief said he had a special mission for us and our spectacular jeans.
I'm sure whatever it is, our sexy jeans will give us the power to acomplish it.
In his office
I have a special mission for the men of action. There's an entity in this universe that's inherently evil. It's presence halts all creative progress in the universe.
I want you to completely obliterate this force. YOU DESTROY PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING OR IT'S YOUR BADGE!

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