Come with me..... your time has come.... your philosophy is dead....
??? I have to save Nature! And establish communes for us to all live in peace and harmony, and the capitalist pigs have not yet learned their errors....
....then once all of the nature killers are gone Mother Earth may flourish once again, and the whales will be safe once more and the ozone will come back, and SUVs will disappear cause.... evil....
shut up! .............. Robert! Come here and help me!
hmmm..... where's an M60 when you need it?!
.... and of course guns are just plain EVIL and WRONG.... regardless of what the Constitution says cause after all it simply exists to keep the working class under control of the Capitalist hogs....
Well, as your high school teacher, I can tell you that it doesn't matter so long as you feel good about yourself.
Phase 2
Why yes I am in a minority, so that means everything will be given to me in the real world, right?
Not only that, but here for your "higher education" you can study the works of your people ad nothing else, cause that should make you a success in any field! Especially once peace and nature triumph.
Phase 3
I can't do a damn thing. And look at that bastard making so much money. I hope my senators tax the shit out of him and give the money to me cause I deserve it.
::sigh:: .... this is what taking my education seriously gets me?! Someone needs to die....
Hey, you want to go to a movie and then have a few drinks at my club?
LOL OMG!!!111 rly?! o plz that soundz wondrful!!! i wud luv 2!! u r so kewl! let me get lotz and lotz of my makup on frst plz...
NO
Hey there, would you like to go to a guest lecture on post-modern proof techniques in contemporary ethical issues, and then discuss it over drinks with a few friends at my club?
Ethics? Isn't that something like it is wrong for us to kill animals and... stuff?
YES
You know, Sir Eddington said that "Proof is the idol before whom the pure mathematician tortures himself."
..... Obviously not from Reading, but that makes her better yet ..... Thank you God! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! .....
Actually you are mistaken. I am Mike. You don't exist.
As Descates said, "Cogito ergo sum." I am thus convinced of my own existance. You, my friend -- nay! my imposter -- are the non-entity.
And since when do you quote Descartes?! Your faith in your perceptions is laughable. "A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything."
And since when do you quote Nietzsche?!? I am going to open up a can of "Aristotelian Whoop-Ass" on you, Mr. Imaginary-non-extant-fake-Mike!
So metaphorical imagry isn't good enough for you, even though one of your favorite hobbies is indeed chess?! Hell, I border on surreal, and one of your favorite artists is Magritte! I hate you!
It's not like she didn't want it... I just don't see why she had to brag to a state trooper... Who the hell thought it would be a good idea to put me in charge of a high school marching band anyway?!
Hey Larry! You wanted to talk about something corps related?
Yes indeed. We need to discuss what some people are calling the "Mike Problem." It seems your personality is causing some offense at rehearsals. I would hate to have to show you the door...
You maintain that, because I was trained to excell and want this corps to do as well as possible, I am somehow viewed as problematic by less dedicated and less talented veterans?
Well... uhhh... you see... hmmmm... the thing is... uhhh... yes you are very talented and we would... uhhh... hate to lose you... and... ummmm... your experience would be must valuable to... uhhh...
BLAH BLAH BLAH.... liberal bullshit.... hurray for fags marrying.... I know math -- really -- I mean I HATE YOU ALL.... flame retardant....
Hey, brilliant fire prevention engineer, I have a question... does wood burn?
FUCK YOU AUSKUNFT!!! I does know math. I are a good engineer and I MEAN IT! Conservatives are EVIL and anime is FUCKING GREAT!!!!!
You know something, you miserable hag...?
If you weren't a horribly ugly, stupid, obnoxious, ghastly retarded sack of shit, I might make you gag on my dick just so you shut the fuck up.
He spoke again!!! I must cry now. I am glad Dusty wants no sexual relations at all ever. But, why is that? Oh, and I forget... does wood burn or not? Hmmm...
Hey Jeff Z., you did a great job as marketing manager! You polished this turd so well we actually attracted some talent this year!
My pleasure, Larry -- I try my best! I would love for us to not be an embarrasement this year -- for all our "history" and "tradition" we have been pretty shitty these past few seasons.
Yep, well, I must be off. You guys really are nowhere as important to me as the Crossmen. Later.
Hey, you take care now. I am going to disappear to Europe for a few weeks and not pay attention to anything corps related.
Uhhh... Larry... Mike just quit. I went ahead and acted like an idiot to him, and he decided he doesn't want to come back.
Well fuck. No championship this season. At least I have the Crossmen... errrr... well, no championship this season.