All comics by phylum_sinter

 

A love story in three panels. by phylum_sinter 3-27-03
insensitive as it is, spitgot was in love. COCKS no.	unable to coerce his newly found chum into homo-dom, he runs back into the warm gooey walls of jerkcity PLEASE, COCK NOW (SCREAMING, RUNNING AWAY) Dude, i'm totally straight	turns out gabe doesn't like fat people, that's all. COCKS alright then, mouth please!

 

The tease, part 1 by phylum_sinter 3-27-03
ms. phone was playing hard to get... RIIIIIINNNNNG RIINNNNG Coming, sweet thang!	and really this is just another demonstration of my often proven theory: don't touch me what is it, then?	women are pure, unmitigated evil. I hate you. WHYYYYY!!!!?!?

 

Leg Thief by phylum_sinter 3-27-03
WHO STOLE MY LEGS!?!? Don't look at me, I was flossing my sheep all day	WHO STOLE MY LEGS!?!? Don't look at me, I was flossing my goat all day	LIAAAR! Dude I was totally joking, here's your legs. Sorry about that.

 

Cannibal clowns, volume 1 by phylum_sinter 3-27-03
I am a crime against nature and god. as am I.	I can't believe we ate all the children. I only ate the cake, that's what made the kids cry, and I forgot how much you hated that. I ate no children.	G A S P ! ! ! Hey whatever, thanks for telling the cops you were my dad, and would punish me... No problem - it's true! I LOVE YOU, SON!

 

Birth of a serial killer. by phylum_sinter 3-31-03
John, why are humans so delicious... And why are they so willing to kill us instead of die noble deaths as dinner? Humans have pride, buggy. We aren't willing to admit we're wrong ever, even if it means destroying everything in our path to prove the point. I didn't know we were delicious.	Well, you are really tasty, and I'd appreciate it if you told your fellow humans to die like the rest of our food. No one is going to believe a bug told me this, Buggy. Not even if I brought you with me.	Then kill for me, and bring me the corpses. done and done.

 

your attention span rivals goldfish. by phylum_sinter 3-31-03
Whats up, robot? You look like you've got something on your mind. I never understood the point of you humans covering yourself with corporate logos -- do you have no pride in yourself?	err pride in myself? I didn't know we were supposed to have any of that. I wear nike because they have great shoes, and their commercials are great. JUST DO IT! Do you know the people that make Nike[tm] only get about .19 an hour to make those $30 shirts? How does that make you feel?	[tv] YOUR BODY IS A TEMPLE - ADORN IT WITH US! JUST DO IT! [rah rah rah] Hold on TV's still calling me. Now I understand.

 

A Simple misunderstanding between robots. by phylum_sinter 3-31-03
Ready, GO! 1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8...9...10...	Alright I'm ready!! ready or not, I'm not playing!	Aw c'mon, I thought you liked this game! from what I understood, the game involved a lot more lazers and destruction, see ya, loser!

 

Not what's said, but what's implied. by phylum_sinter 4-02-03
I'm totally in love with Tom, but he's so freaky! He told me he likes to play with a vibrator when he makes love. That's nothin, ever have a guy take a dump on your face?	There was this one time when he pulled out a bottle of whip cream... it was so hot. I just had the entire Brooklyn Dodgers in my mouth, do you have any gum?	And when I have an orgasm, I twist his nipple with my teeth How many people can fit in a movie theater?

 

Rough me up in the Forums. by phylum_sinter 4-02-03
¿[phÿlûm]_siñt£r, "you must be a real fucking dork!" Your comics are worthy of nearly nothing, and I just thought I'd like to comment on your honest efforts with a single word: "meh"	"...Keep Trying" "...you have the nous to post to RMDC..."	Well that's the last time I show anything to anyone. Back to Tetris! food!

 

Religious excuses. by phylum_sinter 4-02-03
Because selfish prayers aren't answered, my son. Jesus, why didn't I get the bullets I prayed for?	Because that would have hurt someone else. Jesus, why didn't you place a fat guy under me when i fell out of that window?	Because someone else was praying for the exact opposite, my child. Jesus, Why didn't you save Grandma?

 

Suggestion for the back panel of Chee-tos. by phylum_sinter 4-12-03
Hey kids heres a tip: Never beat off while eating Chee-tos brand cheese flavored snacks...	Unless you like to appear jaundiced.	...Anyhow, for more information go to FBI.FOIA.GOV... really?

 

The phone call. by phylum_sinter 4-12-03
So I sez to him "If you wanted a hand job, why didn't you just ask?" and he tells me "I thought I'd get laughed at, or put in my place at least."	and I'm like "Dude, it was a damn whorehouse for god's sake! They get much worse requests than that. so he goes on and tells me how he had his asshole licked, and it took nearly two hours to reach orgasm.	Anyway I'm not going to talk to my dad anymore.

 

Talk to the animals by phylum_sinter 4-12-03
When people manage to speak to animals, a certain magic happens. Ever notice how brown makes you sad, or just plain bored? It reminds me of poo, actually. I just went, btw.	Profundity! Later, jerkface... AWW C'MON! I'm a friggin' duck! I go where I please.	REALLY, PROFOUND! So he just walked away, what a jerk! I just didn't know what to say, really.

 

Captain Represso by phylum_sinter 5-11-03
Hey Jon, Remember that time when your mom and dad invited my parents over, and they all had a greased Sodomy celebration, complete with various barnyard animals and the 'dildo cam'?	. . . no, I don't.	there's the video.

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