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Moturd
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We Need Earth Women
by
Moturd
8-17-17
Attention Earthlings living along a geodesic path extending from Salem Oregon to Charleston South Carolina!
In three days time our Zaxxonian God will display his displeasure with you by making your sun disappear.
The only way to appease him and bring back your lifegiving orb is to send your most attractive females to us for anal probing and insemination.
I just love screwing with these primitive cultures.
Hey I just thought of something! We should launch a microscopic black hole into their sun to make it actually go dark!
OMG! That would be hilarious. They would totally crap their pants.
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Moturd's Comics
03/28/20 - 7 in 10 Millennials Vote Socialist
03/26/20 - An Unbearably Painful Comic
03/24/20 - I'm your #1 Fan
03/24/20 - Happy Hour 7-9
03/21/20 - The Impact of Social Distancing Furlough
03/21/20 - Politics as Usual
03/16/20 - Deep Thoughts by Oppah Muchinguri
03/15/20 - Church of Peter
03/14/20 - And so say all of us!
03/14/20 - Home Remedy
03/12/20 - Stelter's Darkhorse Candidate
03/11/20 - Wuhand Sanitizer
03/11/20 - Pandemic Plethora
03/10/20 - Bugs über alles
03/09/20 - Weakened at Bernies
03/09/20 - First Dates
03/08/20 - How Coronavirus got started
03/07/20 - A Shetland is a pint-sized horse
03/04/20 - Olly Olly Oxen Free
03/02/20 - You Horny Devil!
03/01/20 - Classic Joke Setup
02/29/20 - Freeman Dyson
02/22/20 - Uncle Joe's Funny Stories
02/22/20 - Untitled
02/22/20 - The Weather Predictress
02/21/20 - The Old Chinese Trade Strategy
02/19/20 - Universal Basic Outcome
02/18/20 - Free as a Bird. Poo-tee-weet?
02/16/20 - An Unexplained Absence
02/15/20 - Progressive Party Firsts
02/13/20 - I'm Helping My Uncle, Jack, Off A Horse
02/12/20 - Justin's African Adventure
02/08/20 - Somewhere in Southbend
02/07/20 - Mitt Explains his Vote IV
02/07/20 - Mitt Explains his Vote III
02/07/20 - Mitt Explains his Vote II
02/06/20 - Mitt Explains his Impeachment Vote
02/05/20 - Oh Lucy!
02/05/20 - The Two Party System Never Changes
02/01/20 - Wheel of 4Chan
01/31/20 - Gems from the Weinstein Trial
01/25/20 - Bucking the Trend like a Crazy Horse
01/25/20 - Minimum Wage Loyalty
01/24/20 - Easiest Job in the World
01/21/20 - The Red Pill or the Blue Pill
01/19/20 - The SCOTUS Confirmation Process
01/17/20 - Donut Licker Rides Again
01/12/20 - The Whether Forecast
01/10/20 - The 17.34 Year Itch
01/05/20 - Self Filtering
12/30/19 - The Need For Power
12/30/19 - WaPo Gestapo II
12/28/19 - Stolen Off the Intarwebs
12/28/19 - Sasquatch in a Pant Suit II
12/26/19 - mOt Splains World
12/23/19 - Keeping the Turkey Pot Pie Company
12/21/19 - The Singles Cruise
12/21/19 - More Toilet Humor
12/19/19 - Nancy Forces a Stalemate
12/16/19 - The Underground Grail-road
12/16/19 - Bernie's Cabinet Picks
12/15/19 - Male Chicken of the Sea
12/13/19 - Passing the Jeopardy Torch
12/09/19 - Walmart Public Service Announcement
12/08/19 - The duct tape is where they get you
12/06/19 - Gr-r-r-r-attitude!
12/03/19 - Playstation Turns 25
12/01/19 - Hunter Gets Subpoenaed
11/25/19 - The Presidential Pardon
11/24/19 - The Un-Credible Hulk
11/21/19 - Opining in the Pines
11/20/19 - Pew Pew Pugh
11/11/19 - Should Have Studied Contract Law
11/08/19 - Psycho Seating Tips
11/06/19 - You like me
11/05/19 - Relationship Status: It's Complicated
11/05/19 - Glory Days and Holes
11/02/19 - Happy Melloween
10/30/19 - CNN Noose Hour
10/29/19 - My grandparents, such kidders!
10/28/19 - The WaPo Gestapo
10/21/19 - Sasquatch in a Pant Suit
10/21/19 - Revivification 277
10/20/19 - RIP Congressman
10/20/19 - Warehouse Worker Sniglets
10/13/19 - The Day the Pope's Butthole Puckered
10/11/19 - How To Spin This One
10/09/19 - Unexpected Downtime
10/04/19 - Thwack Bam Kapow
10/03/19 - Whale Season
09/29/19 - Deathrace 2020
09/28/19 - 1984 + 35
09/23/19 - The Rising Tide
09/21/19 - Bad First Date Ideas
09/19/19 - Discount Raw Fish
09/15/19 - Ric Ocasek RIP
09/15/19 - Career Fare
09/12/19 - He's With Her
09/07/19 - Topic Thunder
09/06/19 - Drowned Like a Rat
09/02/19 - Out of the frying pan
08/28/19 - Tough Negotiator
08/25/19 - Soylant Queen
08/23/19 - Fantastic Voyage
08/16/19 - With a little help from my friends
08/16/19 - Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
08/10/19 - Quick! Cremate the Body
08/09/19 - Think Happy Thoughts
08/08/19 - Scoring West Coast Style
08/06/19 - And then leave $50 on the end table?
08/04/19 - He's a big FIBA
08/03/19 - Ode to a Grecian Yearn
07/31/19 - We built this city
07/23/19 - The Democratic Presidential Primaries
07/13/19 - No esta en casa
07/09/19 - Two and Two
07/08/19 - Orgy Island
07/02/19 - Don't Drink the Water!
06/29/19 - Meanwhile at Castle Frankenshame...
06/22/19 - Stuck Flying Coach Until 2021
06/10/19 - Tonight's Monologue
05/29/19 - Weak Sauce Bob
05/28/19 - The Lottery
05/19/19 - Fetal Survival Skills
05/18/19 - CC 717: FILLED EXAMPLE
05/18/19 - CC 717: TEMPLATE
05/17/19 - Grieving for Grumpy Cat
05/10/19 - CC 716: Clown College Reunion
05/06/19 - Killer Rocks From Outer Space
05/03/19 - Panty Raid
04/23/19 - The Bernie Sanders Plan
04/20/19 - Pest Removal
04/18/19 - Available in 33 States with a Prescription
04/18/19 - It's a Hog's Life
04/15/19 - But Security Took My Lighter
04/14/19 - Let's Get Astrophysical
03/31/19 - Alexandria O'Crazio-Cortex
03/28/19 - ‘These aren’t my socks’
03/12/19 - Hashtag #youredoingitwrong
03/12/19 - Hashtag Trashtag
02/24/19 - News Report of National Import
02/24/19 - Free Two Day Shipping
02/22/19 - Wonder Boy
02/22/19 - Utah, Under the Wide Blue Sky
02/21/19 - Broken Record
02/16/19 - I'm Sirius
02/16/19 - Sexbots
02/16/19 - Another Brick in the Wall
02/11/19 - Fact Check
01/30/19 - Shichirin
01/24/19 - All the Libel That's Fit to Print
12/23/18 - Redshirt, Brownshirt, what's the diff?
12/21/18 - Obligatory Exchange
12/21/18 - For Every Einstein...
12/21/18 - OK, OJ
09/20/18 - Euthanasia
09/12/18 - Sex Million Dollar Man
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09/07/18 - Identity Marketing
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09/05/18 - A Change in Affiliation
08/22/18 - Youth in Asia
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08/06/18 - DNN, Democrat News Network
07/31/18 - Overheard in a Bar
07/23/18 - Proper Comic-con Attire
06/23/18 - Caught Red Handed
05/19/18 - What a Snoozer
05/08/18 - Be Best
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05/07/18 - Boy Withholds Organs from Dying Children
05/05/18 - Don't Feed the Giant Rats
04/26/18 - The Boy Who Never Became a Man
04/26/18 - Take Your Kid to Work Day
04/24/18 - When Men Were Men
04/13/18 - CC690: If your name starts with A-E
04/13/18 - CC690: If your name starts with F-J
04/13/18 - CC690: If your name starts with K-Q
04/13/18 - CC690: If your name starts with R-Z
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04/03/18 - Anachronism Defined
03/27/18 - Churlish de Gaulle
03/17/18 - Dead Man Walking
03/13/18 - You're Not Paranoid
03/13/18 - Terms: Buy, Good Till Cancelled
03/09/18 - Internet Dating
02/22/18 - The Ratings War During the Olympics
02/17/18 - Alternate Timeline in Libtardia
02/13/18 - They Were Framed
02/09/18 - Why Won't Starmen Ask For Directions?
02/06/18 - Zoom zoom zoom
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02/04/18 - Bad Day for the Gray Lady
01/30/18 - State of the Uniom
01/27/18 - Hot Ticket Item
01/27/18 - French Frogs Flooded
01/24/18 - Pope Urges Journalists to be Honest
01/21/18 - Mike Rowe (Not So) Soft
01/20/18 - Fat Bass Turd
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01/13/18 - Musical Sweatshirt Logos
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01/11/18 - The Masked Rider Rides the Bus
01/10/18 - Migration Application Help for criminals
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12/31/17 - P.C. Ethnic Jokes part deux
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12/24/17 - Primative Philosophy
12/22/17 - "Cannon Ball" Run
12/21/17 - The Holiday Miracle
12/20/17 - This Strip Is Not Based On A Real Person
12/17/17 - What Has Macaque Gotten Into Now?
12/16/17 - Grabbed by Macaque
12/12/17 - The Enemy of my Enemy is my Friend
12/10/17 - Hillary Would Have Had the Dean Killed
12/08/17 - Halszkaraptor: Killer Swan with Flippers
12/05/17 - Five Star Family Dining
12/03/17 - Christmas Classics Vol. 1
12/03/17 - Pushmi-pullyu
12/03/17 - Hawaii Prepares for Surprise Nuclear Attack
12/02/17 - In Memoriam: Jim Nabors
12/02/17 - That's a Bunch of Bologna!
11/25/17 - The Wizard of AWS
11/24/17 - News Should Be New
11/17/17 - National Thanksgiving Turkey
11/12/17 - Half the Water, Twice as Often
11/09/17 - Born in East L.A.
11/08/17 - Indisputable Evidence of CTE
11/08/17 - One Man's Trash is Another Man's Treasure
10/31/17 - Tales of the 4th Definition
10/31/17 - Double, Double Toil and Trouble
10/30/17 - The Curious Case of Miss Kim Wall 4
10/30/17 - The Curious Case of Miss Kim Wall 3
10/30/17 - The Curious Case of Miss Kim Wall 2
10/30/17 - The Curious Case of Miss Kim Wall 1
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10/29/17 - Angry Birds II: The Pigs Get Porked
10/26/17 - Sex Robots, Closer Than Ever
10/24/17 - Liar, Liar
10/23/17 - Apply Liberally to Head. Rinse and Repeat.
10/22/17 - Jimmy Carter: Honest Christian Democrat
10/20/17 - Never Shatter the Illusion of Believability
10/18/17 - Annie Got My Gun
10/18/17 - Boy Scouts Just Aren't The Same Anymore
10/18/17 - Kangaroo Fight
10/16/17 - Damage Control
10/16/17 - Another Shameful Personal Insight
10/14/17 - An International Collect Call
10/10/17 - From the Bureau of Legislating Politesse
10/09/17 - Post-election Aftermath
09/29/17 - Crying Clown 676
09/28/17 - Overly Pragressive
09/28/17 - Insert Installation Disc and Reboot Your Phone
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09/22/17 - CNN Reports on Sex Robots
09/21/17 - Unrecoverable Application Error
09/19/17 - World's Greatest UN Speech
09/16/17 - You're all a bunch of white nationalists!
09/13/17 - I'm So Sorry Mr. and Mrs. Nichols
09/12/17 - @tedcruz Liked a Porn Tweet
09/11/17 - Sex Robot Owners, Look Out
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08/26/17 - Don't Bring a Gun to a Knife Fight
08/26/17 - ACLU Has Officially Jumped The Shark
08/24/17 - Breaking the Social Contract
08/24/17 - Breaking the Social Contract
08/22/17 - A Child's Priorities
08/17/17 - We Need Earth Women
08/12/17 - He Had Pretty Eyes
08/11/17 - And She Made Multiple Six Figures
08/07/17 - The P.C. Echo Chamber pt 2
08/07/17 - The P.C. Echo Chamber pt 1
08/06/17 - In Other Fake News, Serious Black Escapes Askaban
08/04/17 - Another Shameful True Story
07/31/17 - A Few Good Men
07/26/17 - CC672: The One and Only Baghdad Bob
07/26/17 - Viking Stand-up
07/20/17 - Like a Bloodhound
07/20/17 - OJ Takes a Stab at Making Parole
07/18/17 - The Code of Silence
07/16/17 - Point Counterpoint
07/08/17 - Marketing 101
07/08/17 - The Travel Ban Explained Using Candy
07/07/17 - Speaking to the People of Poland
06/28/17 - Computerized Office Company's Board Meeting
06/27/17 - manbearpig meet manbuspub
06/25/17 - On The Same Plane
06/22/17 - New Neighbors
06/22/17 - English Heatwave 2
06/22/17 - English Heatwave 1
06/19/17 - My Personal Hangups
06/14/17 - GOP Whip Shot by Sanders Supporter
06/09/17 - Fighting for The Coz
06/02/17 - No Portlandia Jury Will See It This Way
05/31/17 - The Smart Shopper
05/30/17 - Artistic Spectrum Disorder
05/23/17 - The Law of Supply and Demand
05/20/17 - (Like a Record)
05/06/17 - Liberal Logic
04/21/17 - In The Bottomless Pit
04/16/17 - In The Bottomless Pit
04/16/17 - In The Bottomless Pit
04/15/17 - In The Bottomless Pit
04/15/17 - In The Bottomless Pit
04/07/17 - Donald's Blood Sugar Level Drops Too Low
03/23/17 - Point Counterpoint
03/22/17 - Hot For Teacher
03/22/17 - Wheel of Misfortune
03/19/17 - The Food Chain (Animated) 15
03/19/17 - The Food Chain (Animated) 14
03/19/17 - The Food Chain (Animated) 13
03/19/17 - The Food Chain (Animated) 12
03/19/17 - The Food Chain (Animated) 11
03/19/17 - The Food Chain (Animated) 10
03/19/17 - The Food Chain (Animated) 9
03/19/17 - The Food Chain (Animated) 8
03/19/17 - The Food Chain (Animated) 7
03/19/17 - The Food Chain (Animated) 6
03/19/17 - The Food Chain (Animated) 5
03/19/17 - The Food Chain (Animated) 4
03/19/17 - The Food Chain (Animated) 3
03/19/17 - The Food Chain (Animated) 2
03/19/17 - The Food Chain (Animated) 1
03/16/17 - Reviving A Dying Careerzlle
03/14/17 - To Catch A Thief
03/13/17 - Follow The Money
03/10/17 - 4000 AD The Roman Apocalypse
03/10/17 - In Memorium Gaius Julius Caesar
03/10/17 - Hangry Hangry Hippolonius
03/10/17 - Ancient Racial Stereotypes
03/10/17 - In The Beginning
03/10/17 - That's What Your Mom Said Last Night
03/06/17 - Marines United
03/05/17 - Door kiss mime id dolmen aim
03/05/17 - My Sex Life Needs A Defibrillator Too
03/05/17 - Donald Gets Blackmaled
03/05/17 - One Flew The Cuckoo's Nest
03/04/17 - Oh Wait, They Weren't
03/03/17 - 4 and 20 Black Birds
03/01/17 - Chicken Chimera Marinara
02/28/17 - A Breach of Decorum
02/25/17 - The Nerd Prom
02/24/17 - The Instruments of Torture
02/22/17 - CC662: Survey Says!
02/21/17 - The New Fox
02/19/17 - CC 662: Warrior Princess
02/19/17 - Liberal Media 0, Google Video 1
02/17/17 - The World Cup of Fake News
02/17/17 - What A Brave Little Girl
02/12/17 - Sometimes All He Wants Is The Fish
02/12/17 - If You Teach A Man To Fish
02/12/17 - The Watershed
02/12/17 - Shoddy Goods and Welfare Checks
02/11/17 - The Necessity of Sleep
02/08/17 - More Than Sharks Love Blood
02/05/17 - Like Two Ships Passing In The Night
02/05/17 - Can I See Your Self-Identification Please?
02/05/17 - Rated PG-17 for Adult Situations and a Dildo
02/05/17 - The Satan Clause
02/04/17 - Where's a Notary When You Need One?
02/04/17 - Let's Make A Deal
02/04/17 - Normally I Only Sell Those to the Zoo
02/04/17 - Presidential Fireside Chat
02/04/17 - A Grassroots Coalition
02/04/17 - Hell Hath No Fury
02/04/17 - At the Love Boutique
02/03/17 - Loose Lips Sink Ships
02/03/17 - I Think Darth Vader Was There That Night
02/03/17 - Trippin' the Multiverse
02/03/17 - Magic Words and Holy Water
02/03/17 - The Heat Is On
02/02/17 - Welcome to the Grand Illusion
02/02/17 - The Lovely Bones
02/02/17 - The Year of the Rooster
01/31/17 - Speaker for the Dead
01/31/17 - The Good, the Bad, and the Furby
01/29/17 - Happy Birthday Son, It's that Furby You Wanted
01/29/17 - Passing the Torch
01/28/17 - The Fright Knight
01/28/17 - We Have Always Been at War with Eastasia
01/28/17 - Changing Times
01/28/17 - Diaper Rash
01/28/17 - Making America Fabricate Again
01/28/17 - Method Acting by Asthma Kid in Malcolm in the Middle
01/28/17 - Couldn't you just Make America Vacillate Again?
01/28/17 - Remember that One 10 Second Episode?
01/25/17 - A Surprise Ending (for some of you)
01/24/17 - Match First Dates
01/23/17 - If Gollum Had Cleaned His Ears Once in a While
01/23/17 - Poetic Justice
01/22/17 - Still Feeling the Bern
01/22/17 - The District of Colic
01/16/17 - Second Coming
01/16/17 - The Immutable Laws of Relationships
01/16/17 - Date Night
01/08/17 - The Great Stan
01/08/17 - And My Wife Needs 11.5 EEE Hats
01/08/17 - Total Consciousness
01/08/17 - Those Cats Were Fast as Lightning
01/08/17 - The Scales of Just Us
01/08/17 - Too Big to Fail
01/04/17 - Bromancing the Stone
01/04/17 - My Trivia Team
01/04/17 - Engaged in your work
01/04/17 - Business As Usual
01/04/17 - I need it delivered yesterday
01/04/17 - Holiday Spirits
12/18/16 - Signs of the Apocalypse
12/18/16 - Will Work For Food
12/18/16 - Nominated for Best Excrement
12/18/16 - Parallels
12/18/16 - Back on the Res
12/18/16 - Dem Donuts
12/18/16 - Wonder Twins
07/16/16 - Management
07/16/16 - When it absolutely positively doesn't have to be there
04/12/16 - Try Try Again
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