... have cooters that are horizontal, unlike caucasian women who have their's vertically, which leads to an interesting phenomenon ...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

...that only costs five dollar...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

... in the greater part of most nations with a population of women sporting horizontal cooters, but -that being said - surprisingly few of these woemn are twitchy vegans who will use any forum to further their cause of not eating animals, even at the risk of closing a sentence or....

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

...accidentally eating something containing pork sausage, bacon or anthrax, however if the flavour is carefully concealed with 2 screaming bottles of Chateau Neuf de Pape, even the most discerning vegan palate...

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

... will tingle with pure joy when tasting "Uncle Spankling's Crunchy Bacon Chips", now in fun shapes like cat-o-nine tails, handcuff, St. Andrew's Cross, and ...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

...1 screaning bottle of Chateau Neuf de Pape..

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Jesus saves, but everyone else in a 10 foot radius takes full damage from the fireball.

...which is getting really old, and so is a very fine vintage, but not as fine as...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

...boinky's ass...

...would be if it were 25 pounds lighter and less lumpy, which isn't like considering...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

... he was just on a Ricki Lake show entitled "Girlfriend, your ass is just too fat to be shaking your booty at the local titty bar", where it was revealed ...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

...that his ass is just too fat to be shaking his booty at the local titty bar, though he makes up for it with tremendous manboobs, because he's been eating...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

...tremendous manboobs, with...

...tremendous manboob flavour sauce...

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Jesus saves, but everyone else in a 10 foot radius takes full damage from the fireball.

...while fervently searching for a bottle of Chateau Neuf de Pape, but since there aren't any left he and Ricki Lake have decided to start on the 99 bottles of beer, over there on the wall...

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

...just behind the enraged drunk smashing every last stinking, hate-filled bottle of Chateau Neuf de Pape on Earth into small smithereens, and mutilating himself with the broken shards as he laughs hysterically, shouting...

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

...the Tibetian equivalent of...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

..."From Hell's heart I stab at thee! For hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee!" as he realizes that the only quotes from Moby Dick he really knows are from Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, which reminds him that...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

the only whales he really knows are from Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, which reminds him that...

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

...it's time to voyage home, which reminds him that...

...he left the oven on last time he was home, which was back in 1974, so...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

... that pan of opossum and hog jowls, he left broiling, should be getting pretty potent just about now, and that eating one bite would alter consciousness, bend space-time, and ...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

...convince him that he is Nichelle Nichols and Gene Roddenberry's love child, which is, of course, impossible, because...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

...Gene Roddenberry is actually Gabe in disguise, and is a...

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Jesus saves, but everyone else in a 10 foot radius takes full damage from the fireball.

...helluva lot sexier than Gabe, according to...

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

...Grace Lee Whitney, who has also diddled with Gene Roddenberry, err.. Gabe, I mean...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.