And a Y by ObiJo 1-12-04

A B C D E F G H... um... A B C D E F G H... um... What comes after H? A-HA! It is I! No you're not! You're a T!

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Obi... that was disgustingly brilliant.

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Poop.

Not a Miracle Woodworker by Xuanwu 1-12-04

So, how did I do? Not too well, Jesus. Woodworking just doesn't seem to be your thing. But my Father has taught me so much. Maybe about oratory, but you should've listened to your other father about carpentry. *sigh* I guess I didn't get an A, then. HA! It's C, Jesus!

That may be the finest compliment I've ever received.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

The First Rule of Having MPD is ... by AtheistDiary 1-13-04

Say it ... we ... we're the same person? And we invented Fight Club and Project Mayhem together, unbeknownst to me? And every night when I go to bed, you take over and command an army to make soap? Well, yeah THAT, but also ... AHA! It is me, Jesus! Great. A third personality. Now I'm horny again. THANKS!

Yes, I know it's a lame attempt. I'm trying to think of more ideas.

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"AthiestDiary, you rock." - MikeyG (I'm LOVED! HOORAH!)

Jesus Christ Super Coach by AtheistDiary 1-13-04

*sigh* Alright, look, let's just take it from the top, ok? AHA! It is me, Jesus! No no NO! DAMMIT! "It is I, Jesus!" NOT me! I! How can you expect to be a celebrity look-a-like if you keep fucking up my lines?!

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"AthiestDiary, you rock." - MikeyG (I'm LOVED! HOORAH!)

More lame attempts.

Jesus Christ Super Coach 2 by AtheistDiary 1-13-04

AHA! It is I, Jesus! An impersonator impersonating a celebrity impersonator? This is getting too fucking surreal.

"It is I" Try Outs by AtheistDiary 1-13-04

It is I, Jesus! Next. It is I, Jesus! Oh lord. NEXT! Oh HELL NO! NEXT!

"It is I" Try Outs 2 by AtheistDiary 1-13-04

It is I, Honorable Ninja Car Salesman Jesus! Ready to slash prices for you and save your dishonorable soul by any means necessary! Ok, you're hired, but only because you've got that big fucking sword. Excellent! Now I must leave Atheist comic before Atheist-san fucks up Honorable Ninja's long standing funny reputation. Syanara!

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"AthiestDiary, you rock." - MikeyG (I'm LOVED! HOORAH!)

Atheist: I think with those last two you've managed to hit the boundary on how funny this in joke can go. It's all downhill from here.

Why I Remain Single by little_kitty 1-14-04

What I wish I looked like... What I think I look like... What I Actually look like... Wait, that's not right... AHA! It's me, Jesus.

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Okay, Lindsay, are you forgetting that I was a professional twice over - an analyst and a therapist. The world's first analrapist.

The original:

CC 228: Father, Father, Father, help me! Part 2 by MikeyG 1-12-04

It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all! Step on a crack, break your mother's back! Amen! Amen! There's other fish in the sea! If you don't donate to the church, Jesus will eat your baby! Amen! WHAT? *smacks lips*

Mine:

Father, Father, Father, help me! Part 2 Redux by attitudechicka 1-15-04

It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all! Step on a crack, break your mother's back! Amen! Amen! There's other fish in the sea! If you don't donate to the church, Jesus will eat your baby! Amen! WHAT? Aha! It is me, Jesus!

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Mediocrity at its most average.

I think you're right.

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"AthiestDiary, you rock." - MikeyG (I'm LOVED! HOORAH!)

There is no such thing as a boundary when it comes to in-jokes.

Those Darn Upcoming Holidays by niteowl 1-15-04

Hey Frosty. Hi Rudolph. Will you be my valentine? Sure. Will you remember me when on Memorial Day when I've melted away? AHA! It is I, Jesus! I knew you'd fucking forget about Easter! Of course, like I'm going to celebrate that pagan holiday.

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

CC 229: Jesus Christ, Superstar by BigEvilDan 1-15-04

Hey Jesus, when were you going to get around to that Second Coming thing? *sigh* Fine, I'll go. AHA! It is me, Jesus! Why aren't you scared? The homeless guy on the corner has been doing this act for a while, and he does it better.

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III

New Bands (3) : Jesus Priest

AHA! It is me, Jesus.

by little_kitty, 1-16-04

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Okay, Lindsay, are you forgetting that I was a professional twice over - an analyst and a therapist. The world's first analrapist.

Judas Christkiller by DragonXero 1-16-04

Drex! Have you heard the latest album from Judas Priest?! No, I haven't heard anything from Judas CHRISTKILLING TRAITOROUS BASTARD! Uh, dude, you okay? Yeah, I'm great. Fuck. AHA! It's me, Jesus!

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

ASIAN AHA! by DragonXero 1-16-04

Well, here we are again. He's probably going to make us say some stupid whorish thing. Likely. Well, we have a suprise. AHA! It's me, Jesus! AHA! It's me, Jesus!... too...

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Because I had to (or) Two cliches with one stone. by UnknownEric 1-16-04

Takin' a walk on a luvverly day... RAAAAR! TOBOR WILL CORNHOLE YOU! I don't think so, bub. RAAAR! AND WHY NOT? Aha! It is me, Jesus! raaaar.

THREE cliches with one stone! by UnknownEric 1-16-04

Aha! It is me, Jesus! Ha ha ha. What the fuck are you talking about?

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I has a flavor!

That's red robot, not Tobor. He said neither 'Raar' nor 'cornhole'.

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Poop.

This is gonna be as big as Cowboy Physics.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Is not.

Is too.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Is not.

AHA! Nice Try! by Rabid_Weasle 1-16-04

Hey buddy, wanna buy a brand new Mercedes? $50! Wow, sure! AHA! It's me, Jesus! Alright, nice try buddy!

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Poop.

Is too.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

This is going to be bigger than The Beatles, who were of course , Bigger than Jesus.

Oh , wait .......

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"