quote:

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THAT'S JUST CRAZBY TALK!

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CC78: Anything but this comic strip by andydougan 11-09-01

So you've now solved all the mysteries of evolution, doc? Everything but the missing link. Uh oh! This restaurant is on fire. All the customers are white while the chef is Chinese. Whom should I rescue, Amazed Porno Bunny? EVERYONE BUT THE KITCHEN CHINC!!!!!11 You're German. Have you read "Capital", "The Critique of Pure Reason", "The Phenomenology of Spirit" and "Thus Spake Zarathustra"? Everysing but ze Nietzsche, I sink.

CC78: Some Good/Bad Weed by fuzzyman 11-09-01

Everything is getting all freaky... Man, this is some good weed! But there may be unintended side effects, eh? Who the hell are you? I'm Jesus Christ, who do you think I am? Now get into the kitchen. You're going to puke in a minute. Uhhhh... I don't feel so good. Oh shit... where's the sink? How did you know this? You can see the future? No, I had a hit of the same stuff once and hurled loaves and fishes all over Judas. Man, was he pissed.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

CC 78: Everything but the non-sequitor donkey by lara7 11-10-01

Everything has gone to shit today. First, Fat Tony accuses me of screwing his wife. Keep your enemies close, but the doctor closer. And the irony is, I actually wasn't. First Mad Sal tortured me, and then he killed my family and pets in front of me. If you can't take the train, stay out of the kitchen. As a final indignity, he left Misremembered Platitude Trout alive to keep me company. Loose lips sink Gabe's carpet.

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When they invent BookFace, I'm -there-.

Heh. He's drowning.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Fantastic!

This is a sad attempt at at a good comic. Lol. Here it is anyways. It kinda doesn't make any sense, but it has all the words in it.

CC 78: My First Stab at a Contest (God this sucks...) by Alcyonae 11-10-01

The day that everything went wrong... Life sucks! But you have so much to live for! Like what? Hmm... The puppy dogs, the pretty birdies, and all that other crap that I can't think of right now. Ahh! No happy things! Let's get you into the kitchen and clean you up. If I remember correctly, your pills are by the sink...

~alison

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I'm back.

CC78: Everything but the kitchen sink. by apejuice 11-10-01

Listen lady, everything will be fine if you just hand over your purse. But I'm an elephant. I don't carry a purse. What? Is this some kind of joke? I saw you paying the pizza boy. Gimme the damn purse. Okay, okay. It's in the kitchen. I'll go and get it. There's not much cash in it though. Just store cards mainly. later Ah, whats the use. How could I sink so low. If my mother could see me now she'd be spinning in her grave. I don't mean to be rude but do you still want this purse or not?

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I LIVE!

CC 78: In AD 2101.. by BigEvilDan 11-10-01

EVERYTHING IS BAD SENTENCE!!!! I AM ON THE WAY TO CONFUSION!!!! WE GET SYNTAX. FOR GRE--Ah, there we go. I fixed the translator, but your orders may have been misunderstood, Captain. Was the order to launch fighters carried out? It seems that way, but we're short on pilots. The kitchen staff we were training as replacements were killed in the blast. So how many pilots were we able to get out there? Enough to launch every zig but the "Kitchen Sink", sir.

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III

Fantastic!

{blush} thanks. amazing what crosses one's mind with when trying to adapt to comic contest rules.{/blush}

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When they invent BookFace, I'm -there-.

That strip made me flashback to CC 50. It was great. :)

just went and read that; that was a good on; props to boorite. I can't believe "prepare to doom your meat" hasn't been used in a comic since that contest!

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When they invent BookFace, I'm -there-.

CC78: Experimental Sailing Ships Gone Wrong by descolada99 11-10-01

Well, a fine mess you've gotten us into this time!! Everything you do ends up this way. But you've got to admit that trying to cross the ocean on a giant inflatable Britney Spears was a hell of an idea! Yeah, until the sharks attacked. It's not my fault they thought Britney's inflated ass looked like a yummy morsel. If we get out of this, you're getting all your "experiements" out of my kitchen - especially the Chia Pussy. It's starting to creep out my wife. But I had to sink my life savings into that! It's almost ready to show to investors!

Ahhh it feels good to be back entering unfunny comics into comic contests with no hope of winning. I'm starting to get my mojo back.

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"Fascist Clay was my most favorite totalitarian boxer!" - Indie Rock Pete from Diesel Sweeties

Things that make you go "What was I thinking?" by DexX 11-11-01

An original copy of "Everything" by The Bangles on vinyl! The awful but inexplicably popular "Macarthur Park" by Richard Harris on four-track tape! The twelve inch vinyl remix of The The's debut single! Ultra-rare Australian Kids in the Kitchen "What About Me?" vinyl single! Original gatefold vinyl copy of "In My Life" by George Martin! Okay, okay, your kitsch music collection beats mine... but George Martin? How could you sink so low?

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

CC78: The plughole's suddenly very big by Tobor 11-11-01

Who have you cornholed recently? RARR! WHERE SHOULD TOBOR BEGIN? GABE, SPANKLING, WIRTHLING, DAVE, DEXX, BOORITE, ANDY, LADYJ, FUZZYMAN, CRABBY... Everything but the kitchen sink, then? NO! TOBOR HAS CORNHOLED THAT TOO!

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RAAARRR!!!

Bastards!

I spent the weekend in Palm Beach County, Florida, and if that doesn't disqualify me from picking a winner, you folks sure did. I counted at least four contestants worthy of the prize, including as runners-up:

[list][*]Big Evil Dan and his nasty barrage of puns
[*]fuzzyman with three great comics
[*]Namgubed who found an outstanding rulebender and the best Battleship comic I've seen (including my own (-:)
[/list]
But somehow hanging under all those chads, this comic snuck in to claim the big top:

CC 78: Everything but the non-sequitor donkey by lara7 11-10-01

Everything has gone to shit today. First, Fat Tony accuses me of screwing his wife. Keep your enemies close, but the doctor closer. And the irony is, I actually wasn't. First Mad Sal tortured me, and then he killed my family and pets in front of me. If you can't take the train, stay out of the kitchen. As a final indignity, he left Misremembered Platitude Trout alive to keep me company. Loose lips sink Gabe's carpet.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Ahhh yes. My streak is intact!!! I rule....

Can't wait until the next contest to improve my unfunny. Yee doggies!!

Lara, that was a damn fine strip.

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"Fascist Clay was my most favorite totalitarian boxer!" - Indie Rock Pete from Diesel Sweeties

Well done Lara!

(is it too early to suck up? ..... please? ....... maybe later?)

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

I'm hurt I didn't even get an honorable mention.

quote:

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[list][*]fuzzyman with three great comics
[/list]

Interesting that I submitted four strips... Meaning one sucked... and I think I know which one it was, LOL.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

quote:

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quote:

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[list][*]fuzzyman with three great comics
[/list]

Interesting that I submitted four strips... Meaning one sucked... and I think I know which one it was, LOL.

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Actually, the fourth was roughly average. :-)

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

"Misremembered Platitude Trout "

Was what won it for ya. I dont think anyone will deny that a phrase like that can become "Cult" with but a few readings.

It was exceptional.

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

quote:

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"Misremembered Platitude Trout "

Was what won it for ya. I dont think anyone will deny that a phrase like that can become "Cult" with but a few readings.

It was exceptional.

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And some of us still hope to see more of him.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com