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gabe_billings
President and CEO of Wirthlingsux Inc.

Member Rated:

When did you leave MA? I mean MD?

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

9-30-02 7:13pm (new)
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wirthling
supercalifragilisticexpialadosucks

Member Rated:

I am no longer in Wisconsin.

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

9-30-02 8:52pm (new)
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Spankling
Looking for love in ALL the wrong places, baby!

Member Rated:

Is it like coming down off a drug? Do you have the shakes? Do you see cows everywhere?

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

9-30-02 8:57pm (new)
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wirthling
supercalifragilisticexpialadosucks

Member Rated:

It is when you have a night like I had in Madison Saturday night. I was at a wedding, drinking heavily. Just before we were about to leave, my wife and I had a bit of a disagreement and I, having lost any semblance of sense, decided I was going to walk back to the motel. This might have been an OK idea if I knew where I or the motel was, but I didn't. I ended up wandering around downtown Madison, asking various people if they knew where the motel was. (Me: "Do you know whar the Shuu Spa Supper 8 motel ish?" Them: "Which one?" Me: "I dunno.") For some reason, I decided it would be a good idea to stop in a couple of bars and drink more while I continued my research into the location of the motel. After several bars, I was no closer to the motel (or was I?). Then, harsh, cold rain began to fall and I had no coat. I wandered some more, getting chilled to the bone, before it occurred to me that I wasn't going to find the motel on my own. Dozens of taxis passed me as I shivered and stumbled down random streets. I decided I should use my calling card to call a cab but I was so drunk that I couldn't speak coherently or dial the phone. Just when I was sure that I was going to die of hypothermia lying in a gutter, a taxi finally stopped for me. That was about 5am, several hours after leaving the wedding. I'm not sure how far I walked that night but my legs are still sore today.

In short, it was a fun trip.

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

9-30-02 9:21pm (new)
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kaufman
Director of Cats

Member Rated:

That's it. Wirthling just wrapped up CC 144.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

9-30-02 9:25pm (new)
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itsclark
Bar Room Superman

Member Rated:


I believe you've just described any given night in Glasgow, Withling.

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

9-30-02 9:52pm (new)
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ladyjdotnet
Snitcreator

Member Rated:

It sounds like one of those scenes in a movie where some guy hits bottom, and all the lit-up signs of various bars are superimposed on a scene of him staggering endlessly with a look of utter desperation on his face.

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I am a delicate fucking flower. https://beacons.ai/jesskent

10-01-02 5:16am (new)
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bunnerabb
Some bloke.

Member Rated:

You mean "Friday"?

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

10-01-02 8:01am (new)
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gabe_billings
President and CEO of Wirthlingsux Inc.

Member Rated:

HAHAHAHA!

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

10-01-02 9:02am (new)
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gabe_billings
President and CEO of Wirthlingsux Inc.

Member Rated:

I'm not sure if I've ever related this story before... It's a funny one, and I'd love to have everyone get a good laugh at my expense.

When I was in first grade, my parents got me a set of touchy-feely growing up type books. You know the ones, like "How To Deal With Getting Beaten at School" and "What the Fuck is This Thing Between My Legs". That sort of shit.

Well one of them was all about safety; how not to cut your fingers off with dad's bandsaw, etc. I still remember these books pretty well, but one page of this book stands out vividly in my mind. It's of a stupid kid jamming a paper clip into an electrical socket. He's got sparks coming out his ears, and they mention that doing such a thing is pretty dumb.

Being dumb myself, I immediately tried it. I don't remember getting hurt, but I do remember the faceplate of the socket being pretty much black when I was done. I didn't die, however, and learned the important lesson that you shouldn't jam things into electrical outlets. And you should pay attention when other people tell you not to jam things into electrical outlets.

Anyhow, I had to run down to the hospital today to see the wife. There's this used bookstore across the street that she's been going to and had told me how cool it was. She even bought me some nifty kids book about firetrucks.

I was thinking that old childrens books might be chock full of fun Photoshopping opportunities, so I went in to check it out myself.

What do I find, but half a dozen of those books I had when I was in first grade! And they had the one on safety! Needless to say, I bought it. I wanted to share it with all of you.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

10-04-02 6:24pm (new)
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fuzzyman
Alpha Geek

Member Rated:

That's just shocking.

Electrifying, really.

Yes, I have to say that I got a charge out of that.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

10-04-02 9:25pm (new)
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il_schmucko
needs money.

Member Rated:

from page 1 of this thread:-evil_d, 3-19-2001

holy shit this is creepy. evil_d is some kind of prophet! as of the end of today, 10/4, 629 days have elapsed since the first comic. today's last comic seems to have been kaufman's, which was #92374. this means a daily comic output of roughly 146.86 over that span.

projecting this rate into the future, we ought to hit number 100,000 on November 26th. lay off the nostradamus shit, evil dude!

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"I don't know who you are, schmucko, but you rule." - lara7 | christ@myself.com

10-04-02 9:30pm (new)
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Spankling
Looking for love in ALL the wrong places, baby!

Member Rated:

My big sister used the holiday season to show me the magic of electricity.
I tumbled backwards and my arm tingled up to my shoulder. Women torturing me has been a long road.

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

10-04-02 9:34pm (new)
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evil_d
Riding through your town with his head on fire

Member Rated:

In the future I'll just start charging money for my services. Stripcreator special: $10 to find out whether you're going to get cornholed by Tobor today.

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

10-04-02 10:24pm (new)
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evil_d
Riding through your town with his head on fire

Member Rated:

Also on the first page of this thread, I asked why there was a spike in usage on February 27, 2001. I've since discovered that DragonXero is at least partly responsible, having made over 100 comics on that day.

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

10-04-02 10:34pm (new)
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ladyjdotnet
Snitcreator

Member Rated:

In the future I'll just start charging money for my services. Stripcreator special: $10 to find out whether you're going to get cornholed by Tobor today.


Wouldn't knowing just take the fun out of it?

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I am a delicate fucking flower. https://beacons.ai/jesskent

10-05-02 12:11am (new)
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il_schmucko
needs money.

Member Rated:

to speak in words with just one beat is not that hard. conversely, using polysyllabics exclusively presents disproportionate difficulty.

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"I don't know who you are, schmucko, but you rule." - lara7 | christ@myself.com

10-05-02 3:40pm (new)
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gabe_billings
President and CEO of Wirthlingsux Inc.

Member Rated:

quote:

Data range: 01/06/2001 - 03/18/2001
Daily comic totals-
Mean: 140.9
Median: 90
Mode: 74
High: 622 (02/27/2001)
Low: 46 (01/21/2001) *not counting the 3 of the first day

At the current daily average, we should reach #100K in 636 days, or mid-December of 2002.


Hey, I came up with close to the same numbers. You can't argue with statistics, baby.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

10-06-02 9:53am (new)
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gabe_billings
President and CEO of Wirthlingsux Inc.

Member Rated:

That bug that Bob caught two weeks ago is STILL FUCKING ALIVE! I finally felt so sorry for him that I got him down. He's now recuperating in a peanut butter jar on my deck.

http://www.woodenbadger.com/bob/

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

10-06-02 2:47pm (new)
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Spankling
Looking for love in ALL the wrong places, baby!

Member Rated:


I had a girlfriend like Bob once.

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

10-06-02 3:56pm (new)
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JrnymnNate
I fling the shoddy polo stick

Member Rated:

Of course the obvious question is, What about Bob?

10-06-02 6:00pm (new)
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gabe_billings
President and CEO of Wirthlingsux Inc.

Member Rated:

They've got a picture of the van they're looking for in connection with the sniper attacks.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

10-12-02 4:58pm (new)
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boorite
crazy knife lady

Member Rated:

I was really impressed that the FBI, with much advance press, released a "composite drawing" of a white Isuzu box truck. I ALREADY KNEW WHAT A FUCKING WHITE ISUZU BOX TRUCK LOOKS LIKE.

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What others say about boorite!

10-14-02 8:14am (new)
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gabe_billings
President and CEO of Wirthlingsux Inc.

Member Rated:

Man, these campus computer labs are sad. Most of the people in them are dopes. If I had a nickel for every person around me who can't figure out how to print something, I'd be a rich man.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

10-14-02 4:09pm (new)
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boorite
crazy knife lady

Member Rated:

Welcome to my life as a librarian, which many of our patrons think means "computer lab assistant."

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What others say about boorite!

10-15-02 8:32am (new)
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