Welcome to one side of this two-headed Contest.

The rules for submission of a comic to this thread are simple:

[list=1][*]Your comic in some way must celebrate life -- the phenomenon and the experience known as life.

[*]Someone or something in your comic must represent God. It can be Jesus, it can be dogonball, it can be boorite, it can be the fire prop, it can be height2 on the clouds1 background, I really don't care.

[*]Some form of transportation must be involved in your comic. Simply using the "ambulance" background does not satisfy this requirement.

[*]New comics only, no photoshopping.[/list]

Just to remind you of the general contest rules, there are two contest threads, this one and the one labeled CC 217-O. You will have until 2:00 PM SC time, Tuesday, October 28, to submit your entries.

You may enter either or both contests. It's up to you.
However, remember, you may only submit five comics -- spend them wisely. A total of no more than five entries may be posted by any person to the two threads. A sixth entry will disqualify all of your entries, so use your 5 comics strategically to try to get whichever thread you want to count, to count.

The winner of CC 217 will be the comic selected as the best one from the contest thread with the fewest entered comics as of the submission deadline.

Good luck, have fun.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Live, Love and be Happy by Spankling 10-21-03

I don't know if I'm ready to live Eternal Complete One! Don't make me go! AHHHHH! The wheel has turned. Your time has come. Ride down to Earth and to your loving mother who awaits. Embrace existence. You will be returned to us when the time is right. FUCK THAT! HOW AM SUPPOSED TO FIT MY HEAD THROUGH THERE? Shit. What is this? Iraq? Praise Alah! You may be ugly like a marine that raped me, but you are my first born.

The transportation thing may not be what you had in mind...

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

CC 217-K: A Song Of Solomon by umfumdisi 10-21-03

My heart was split, and a flower appeared; and grace sprang up; *poof* I'm Lotus. *sproing* I'm Grace. and it bore fruit for my God. After much travail over hill and dale, I bring fruit and gourd for you, My Lord. Sheesh. Put it in the barn with the rest of the "donations."

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Chicken Feather Bed Bugs Bunny Hop Sing Out Side Street Walker Texas Ranger Cookie Dough Boy Wonder Years

CC 217 part 1 by SinatraFonzarelli2 10-21-03

I don't want to live. I want to stay here in the secure womb. Life out there is miserable. It's a dire world of corruption and darkness. Of death and disease. Of famine and poverty. That may be true, but it's also a world of love and beauty. Would you rather take a chance and enter an exciting world or uncertainly, or stay in this boring womb and live a life of ennui? Why, you're right! I want to live! I want to be born! One traumatic and painfull birth inside a taxi cab later! Life is beautiful! Now to live the short amount of it we all get to it's fullest! Hey! You pay for cab ride!

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I LICKED HORSERADISH SAUCE OFF HITLER'S MUSTACHE! Also the Wolfman.

Faith, Dope and Charity. by smamurai 10-22-03

Bertie is deep in prayer when a vision of the Lord appears, slightly singeing his new carpet.. Dear Lord above. Please save my coma wife. Please forgive me for slipping the ATV into cruise-control then climbing on the roof to car-surf, while my wife was sleeping in the back seat. Bertie! I am the voice of God. When you go to the hospital you will find your wife is awake again. In return I command you to give more to charity. But I already give two dollars a month to United Way, what more can I do? Have I not given of myself enough already? Give them a fish and they will be able to feed their family for a day. But give them the tools to farm and they can feed themselves for a lifetime. You must go to Ethiopia, buy a tractor & help farm. Forgive me for questioning you O' Lord. My fate is in your hands. I will go to Ethiopia and preserve life in your name. How can I fail with the wisdom of the Lord behind me? Ahhh, I can see it now, beautiful fields, with row after row of assorted fish. Cod, Haddock and Trout growing strong with the suns light and the soils earthy goodness.

1, 1 comic strip, ah ah ah ahhhhh.

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GOVT. Warning: Do not smoke around children they will badger you for fags.

CC 217: Dirty Screw by totallyawesome 10-22-03

Honey? I have something I have to tell you... Yes dear, what is it? ...I'm pregnant Fuck Haw haw, that'll teach you to mess with god, you dirty screw!

You see, it's funny because a robot is pregnant

The idea of using Boorite as God inspired me...

CC217-K: As Rick Springfield once said, celebrate youth. by UnknownEric 10-22-03

I can't take anymore. I'm going to do it... What's the hubbub, Bub? I'm God, and I'm here to tell you not to kill yourself. You have a great adventure ahead of you! A great adventure? Maybe I should live! Maybe life is great! Maybe I should celebrate life! Oh, and here comes the adventure now! That wasn't God, was it? Shut up, bitch.

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I has a flavor!

20,000 Reams Under The Sea. by ArtemisStrong 10-22-03

D'ya think we packed enough dehydrated eel-steaks for our undersea voyage, Tobor (the ass-raping robot)? Goddammit... All purity and innocence is lost in our consumeristic, capitalist/fascist world! Our collective soul has been crushed by conglomerated wealth machines! Calm down there ol' chap. Hey, look out the starboard porthole... I think I see a colencath. Truly amazing! Why must there be opulent greedmongers feasting on the flesh of dead creatures while aerosol huffing teenagers die hungry on the streets? Why God, WHY? Because I said so. Now go make me an Ostrich burger! (Life is sweet.) Yes, my Horrible and Amazing Lord and Saviour and Love Connection. [*Praying sounds*]

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Ham-fisted ham fisting.

CC 217-K : The Game Of Life by niteowl 10-22-03

Welcome to the Game Of Life! Choose A Career Path : College or Get A Job. I can't believe we're graduating in a couple of days. Amazing, isn't it? Get married. Buy a house. Lose all your money in the stock market. Get divorced. Start drinking heavily. Lose your job and your house. At least I still have my health. Not for long unless your hand over the beer. Retire. Or something like that. I want a do-over God! No dice. This is payback for moving that extra space to land on "Inherit $50,000"

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

CC 217-K: EFIL 4 'NIPPIRTS by umfumdisi 10-23-03

Our "Yahweh on the Street" asks people about the meaning of life. Hello, good sir, may I ask you, "What is the Meaning of Life?"  42  God teleports to the mall... Hello, fair lady, may I ask you, "What is the Meaning of Life?" Refrigerator magnets are FOUR for ONE DOLLAR. God teleports to stripcreator.com... Hello, good sir, may I ask you, "What is the Meaning of Life?" Lubrication, Intimidtaion, Flatulation, Ejaculation!

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Chicken Feather Bed Bugs Bunny Hop Sing Out Side Street Walker Texas Ranger Cookie Dough Boy Wonder Years

CC217: Life, the cereal and the magazine by mmyers 10-23-03

Hey jack ass, what's the big idea slamming on your brakes like that? You hit the back of my car! Would you look at the back of my car? All my precious bumperstickers are lost. What are you, some kind of religious fanatic? All those stickers with bible verses on them. If God really was your pilot, he should have seen this coming. Oh-no, I wouldn't make fun of that. You see, God really is my pilot, I ride shotgun. He was just answering his cellphone. Bitch about my driving will ya. See? Now you've done it, you've got him rilled up. This is how famines start.

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

life/?/soon by crabby 10-23-03

I woke up this morning and I just feel different. Suddenly I have this urge to live life to it's fullest, almost as if the very fate of the world is resting inside of me. .em fo edisni gnitser si dlrow eht fo etaf yrev eht fi sa tsomla ,tselluf s'ti ot egru siht evah I ylnedduS .tnereffid leef tsuj I dna gninrom siht pu ekow I Nothing is going to stop me today. I'm going to march into my bosses office and sign up for that flag football team. No health insurance agency is going to hold me back! You are going to go to work and turn in your resignation. Then you will go to the dessert and give birth to my second son of this earth. The next day........... You know, Women complain about giving birth all the time, but I was just impregnated with the second son of God and I'm fine. I mean, I only had a days notice to get ready. It was easy.

life/?/soon 2 by crabby 10-23-03

This is going to be alot of responsibility. The second son of god! Your job is done. You were simply my vessel into this realm. As the wrath of god I will have 24 hours to do his biding on earth. I will age rapidly until I reach the desired state of mind to handle the situations laid before me. I must let the world know the word of the lord through example. I will punish those who deserve it, they have had the path before them all along and ignored it. For this they will be punished. Some will learn others will not. Some people just won't give a shit.

life/?/soon 3 by crabby 10-23-03

All these people have done wrong. Hopefully they can be enlightened....This robot was programed simply for revenge. This owl has been praying for the death of his brother. The child on the left hasn't taken that mask off since his grandfather was killed....The child on the right has a serious marijuana problem that will catch up with him soon. This man has become a false prophet in the eyes of millions, he doesn't even realizing he's done anything wrong. This woman is a disgrace to herself and her gender.

Life thingy: Meow by Zegota 10-24-03

What'll I do today? More sleeping, eating and nothinging? Shit! I'm late, gotta catch my bus, gotta get to work!!! Life, is gooooood.

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And you know what Hell is, folks. It's Andy Gibb, singing 'Shadowdancing' for aeons and aeons...

This strip occurs on a bus trip.

CC 217-K: Tyler works in mysterious ways by mmyers 10-24-03

You disgust me. How can you eat meat like that? Hey man, somethings must die so that other things may live, you know? Right on! Hey, are you God? Let me guess, you thought I'd be taller.

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

hahaha

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And you know what Hell is, folks. It's Andy Gibb, singing 'Shadowdancing' for aeons and aeons...

CC217-K: Why Was I Born Human? by ivytheplant 10-26-03

Washing dishes la la la...trying to ignore the piercing stare of whatever is behind me la la la... You will stop your silly human activities. You will drive to the store and buy me goodies... Must...resist! Must...not ...give...in...to ...cuteness! I am your God. I command you. Buy me goodies! Purrrrr! Later... There...are you happy now? I bought you all sorts of toys and treats. It's a good life.

CC217-K: Life Deconstructed by ivytheplant 10-27-03

Proof that God has a sense of humor. Life 2.0 initiated. Enable self-replication? Yes No Ingore? *Input "Yes" Enter.* Input desired form of self-replication. *Input "Physical contact in hard-to-reach-areas, silly faces, and sounds to make children giggle" Enter* ...Now to fly to the mortal realm and see my handiwork. Oh Adam! Spank me! Spank me HARDER! Success! Wait'll the Host hears about this! No more dull Friday nights!

How life began by EvilZak 10-28-03

Let there be humans to dominate the world. Let there be animals for the humans to travel on. And let them make more life by reproducing. I think he meant within your own species. Too late now!

Jon and God by EvilZak 10-28-03

Hi. And that's how I realized just how special life is. So are we still gonna run over hobos with a pickup truck? Hell yeah!

Life is great because you can be anything you want to be by EvilZak 10-28-03

By R'leyh a jumbo jet attacks 23 crayons with ImageElvis, a pony sniffer, and 17 things. Don't call us, we'll call you.

The airplane crash by EvilZak 10-28-03

This crash makes me realize just how wonderful life is. I'll become a devout Christian and make other lives better if you'll save me God! Okay, I'll see how this goes... So, what do you think of me now? That flight was to Baltimore, dumbass!

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AFROMANS MOVE

The Father, The Son and The Holy Shit. by smamurai 10-28-03

When a shark is humming the theme from JA\/\/S you know he is out to get you.. O God, hear me now. If you can get me out of this I swear I will build a church...... Dee dum, dee dum ....in your name..... I have saved you my child, remember to make good on your promise. .....out of LEGO. Ha ha sucker! Oh, ah you little... I hate it when that happens.

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GOVT. Warning: Do not smoke around children they will badger you for fags.

CC217-K - Tonight you are the special one by kramer_vs_kramer 10-28-03

I can believe my wife's having an affair! I can't take it any more- I'm jumping overboard! Stop right there! Huh? Who are you? I am the lord God Almighty! I am here to give warning that it would be very foolish of you to jump. You're right! Life is worth living! From this day forth, I shall dedicate my life to doing good deeds and spreading Your word. Or you could just jump off from somewhere on the outside of the boat.

CC217-K: Be Careful What You Pray For by Chi_The_Cynic 10-28-03

I was bored today, so I thought I'd perform a miracle It seemed like a good idea at the time... I don't care if you are the Lord God's representative on Earth, speeding is an offence! There's clearly more life in that Popemobile than you let on

CC 217-K: Getting a life by BigEvilDan 10-28-03

And God said "Let there be life"... Let there be life. ...and it was good. Sweet. Until it learned to speak. ...and I want a rocket car and a pony and peace on earth and a pet monkey.. Look, I'm not freaking Santa. Just leave me alone!

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III