http://patft.uspto.gov/netacgi/nph-Parser?Sect1=PTO1&Sect2=HITOFF&d=PALL&p=1&u=/netahtml/srchnum.htm&r=1&f=G&l=50&s1=6485773.WKU.&OS=PN/6485773&RS=PN/6485773

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And you know what Hell is, folks. It's Andy Gibb, singing 'Shadowdancing' for aeons and aeons...

This should be a big seller. I don't know a single guy who hasn't at some point or other in his life wanted to taste like a Pixie Stick.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Now guys can make thier "French glue" taste like a fruit smoothie. Big deal. What we really need is a way to give it the soul-destroying addictivity of heroin.

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

We are already bottling New Boorite Wild Cherry Spunk, available soon at your grocer.

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What others say about boorite!

This should make my night job a lot more bearable.

And yet, I still don't think it will help guys get laid.

What could be a better pick up line then, "Hey baby, my cum taste like Pina Colada!" No woman could resist that!

She might wonder how you came to that conclusion, though.

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

DRINK MY CUM!!!!!!!!!!!

Piña coladas aren't really my cup of tea. You'd do better seducing women with strawberry daiquiris.

You're such a suave devil -- like a real-life James Bond or something.

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

"Splooge -- the Un-Cola."

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Ladies?? Daiquiris??? Pina Coladas???? When did SC become a 1970s disco adjoining a trailer park? Good Lord! There are no ladies, particularly among the women we are trying to pick up. Daiquiris are for people who want to get fucked up but can't brave liquor. And Pina Coladas are Daiquiris for people who associate drink with coconut suntan lotion. Does anyone know what I'm talking about? because I'm not sure I do.

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What others say about boorite!

It sorta reminds me of that song, "Do you like penis coladas..."

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Let's put it this way: It may not help guys get laid, but it will help them keep those they do get in bed with. Provided those women like to lick the twizzler.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Maybe there will be different flavours, and guys will subconciously pick their flavour based on their personality. And in turn, it could be like in the 60s and 70s when people would ask, "What's your sign?" Instead it would be "What's your flavour?" or "Have you ever been with a blueberry?"

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Poop.

I'm really into fat chicks. Can I get this in "KFC Original Recipe" flavor?

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

This stuff is definitely going to be bought by people like Rabid, who wants it not because of the complaints he's received from women about the taste of his semen.

He will buy it because his lover calls him "Private Snowball".

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

You never call me that... stop making shit up.

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Poop.

[Click to view comic: 'Flav-a-cum']

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

I ALWAYS do, but by that time you have already pushed me away and went to sleep.

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

What can I say, with an ass as loose as yours, it takes a lot of effort to get off.

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Poop.

They stole my idea :O

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Poo perhaps?

Hey, I looked up the lyrics for that "Pina Colada" song...

"Do you like penis coladas--
Getting jizzed in the face?
Do you like taking loads at midnight
In the dunes of the cape?
Then you're the one that I take
this sperm-taste-enhancing
vitamin-replenishing only-
lasts-24-hours-so-come-on-
hurry-up-already-and-slob-
on-Bob-beeeyatch pill for...
Cum with me and escape."

You go, Rupert!

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Chicken Feather Bed Bugs Bunny Hop Sing Out Side Street Walker Texas Ranger Cookie Dough Boy Wonder Years

Don't forget to put it in comic strip form, and post to Music Super(star) Market.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com