I don't know about the rest of you regulars out there, but I make quite a few strips just for the hell of it that I never bother to post on the General Board since they're not topical, nor do they have a context on their own other than just as a comic. Here's one for your enjoyment.

You can feel the slap coming from a mile away... by Drexle 8-09-01

Do these clothes make me look fat? Of course not.... It's those sixty pounds of excess adipose tissue that make you look fat.

I know DragonXero probably has a lot, but how many of you have comics that you never posted on the main board? If you have any, let's see some of them.

yeah! all right...

Now for a Public Service Announcement by habnem 8-04-01

Hey Joey, wanna go smoke some pot? It'll be great! Yeah! Everyone I know says that smoking pot is great! I'm really excited to try it! This comic strip brought to you by the American Coalition For Having Lots and Lots of Fun.

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- christ@myself.com - fuck a cat, kill yourself - my alter ego has five stars

or, in the spirit of this forum in general, you could start with "The Mildly Happy Hooker" and move forward. for that matter, you could make me one of your favorites! yeah!

erm... maybe not. (:

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- christ@myself.com - fuck a cat, kill yourself - my alter ego has five stars

Back when I was still capable of coming up with ideas independently, I used to make strips without posting them all the time. Of course, back then we could see our comics' relative ranking, so there was some feedback mechanism other than written communication. Anyway, I haven't written a comic that I didn't mean to post in some time, but that's more because I'm out of ideas than anything else. Obviously, not everyone has that problem, and some people have that problem but keep making comics anyway.

Here's what I believe to be the most recent comic of mine that didn't show up on the boards.

James Bond comes to the Strip Creator by evil_d 6-26-01

So, what sort of evil plan have you cooked up for me this time, Generic Villain? Hahaha! With this hypnosis device, I'll turn you into your own worst enemy, 007! Do you expect me to talk? No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to hammer a nail into your head! Success!!

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

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or, in the spirit of this forum in general, you could start with "The Mildly Happy Hooker" and move forward. for that matter, you could make me one of your favorites! yeah!

erm... maybe not. (:

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I can identify with that.

*raises hand* Ohh ooh, that's me too! ;)

Pretty much all of my recent comics are for a specific thread on the forums. It just doesn't seem useful without the comic listings. If I have a good idea though, I will occasionally make up a new one.

Max Payne by BigEvilDan 8-16-01

The city was cold with the icy grip of winter. Not a soul could be seen outside, which was good, because I had already sold mine. AHH!! The pain! Why God, why? They'd left me to take the fall, but they didn't count on my making such a mess on impact. It was time to stab at the heart of this monster they call the mob. Make the suffering stop!!! How the hell is Max Payne killing so many of our henchmen? He's not even carrying a gun! Yeah, but he wields a mean metaphor...

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III

Jesus explains creation by apejuice 8-28-01

All things bright and beautiful. All creatures great and small . . . All things wise and wonderful. The lord God made them all . . . Except you.

don't think i posted this one anywhere.

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I LIVE!

My god, I think I ruptured something vital laughing at that one. Fucking hell, apejuice, welcome to the forum! *laugh* "Except you..." *laugh*

Incidentally, I did my own "Do I look fat?" strip many moons ago. Here it is...

Old joke, new punchline... by DexX 1-13-01

Does this outfit make me look fat? No, your huge flabby body makes you look fat.

Oh, and may I do the grandpa thing for a moment and point out that when I first started doing strips here, there was no forum. Low Pass had a few forums, but none devoted to the strip creator. I started hanging out there when JohnnyBrad made a dedicated forum. As such, the first slab of my strips are non-forum. I will dig up my favourite of that period and post it next...

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Okay, I went through my strips from the start one at a time, and here is the first one that I thought was pretty funny...

Go for your guns... by DexX 1-08-01

High noon... *clink clink* *clink clink* This is it, you bastard. Yoah gonna pay fer shootin mah paw! Right! Let's finish it once an fer awl. DRAW! *nnnggggh!* This shooting thing would work better if we could move our arms.

Actually, even my first few aren't bad. Damn, where did all my funny go? :(

PS. Big Evil Dan is not included in my grandpa speech. I think he was here before me, actually...

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I like this one...

The Man With One Testicle by tiger8191 8-31-01

Dear Sexy Boy! I love the way you talk to me. You are so kind and sweet. I hope one day we will get to be together for the rest of our lives My love will endure time as I have finally found my one true love in you! That ball of yours is magic! Wow! Who could she be? I haven't seen any girl in months! Maybe it was that gimpy woman I met at the Rec Center? Stop reading my mail!

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"I know how toast works."

Newbie. :p

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III

Hey, wow! I am reading all my strips again, and this one caught me totally by surprise...

I remember when my father sat me down... by DexX 1-18-01

OK son, time to clear up some misconceptions about our species... First - we do NOT eat cans. This is a ridiculous urban myth about goats which we are all sick of. Drink all the beer, then throw the can away, OK?

I remember writing it, but I had completely forgotten the punchline. I think it is one of my better strips, but I had almost no idea it was there...

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I like that! That made me laugh for the first time today! Thanks!

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"I know how toast works."

I was making comics while most of you were just twinkles in your ancestors' eyes, but I just never visited the forum. So almost all of mine have only been seen by my associates or other unfortunates who chose to read through my archives.

The stip below is my most critically acclaimed. Whether this is justified or no, you decide. To paraphrase Bill Hicks, I'm sorry if anyone's Catholic. Not because you may be offended, but just because you're Catholic.

Divine comedy by andydougan 7-09-01

Lord, I am not worthy to receive you, but only say the word and my soul will be healed. Hee hee! The blood of Christ. Aaaah ha ha ha ha!!! Okay, son, fun's over. Time for you to tell those poor people the truth. Five more minutes, dad, please...

Or the strip, even.

apejuice, that was freakin' cool! "But not you..."

Andydougan, that was just cruel. I think you're being too hard on Catholics. ;)

6th of March, Andy? HA!

I scoff at your claims of oldness. :P

*scoff scoff scoff*

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here's one i made tonight, long after my forum debut:

TITANIC: The Alternate Ending. by habnem 9-14-01

Oh no! I lost Rose, and now I'm stuck at the bottom of the north Atlantic! But at least I'm still alive. I guess this isn't really so bad after all... I'M THE KING OF THE SEA! Heh heh.

i say "forum debut" rather than "boards debut" because it makes me feel like a penthouse correspondent.

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- christ@myself.com - fuck a cat, kill yourself - my alter ego has five stars

Oh yeah, I have a bunch of comics like that, especially from my early days. For instance:

Speedball by kaufman 5-17-01

Scientists have invented a new, environmentally-friendly means of rapid transportation. Here to demonstrate, our intrepid traveler leaves Washington DC at 8 AM. By 9:30, he's zooming across Iowa ... ... and by noon, he's in San Francisco. Oops, it looks like they're still ironing out a few bugs in the brake system.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

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6th of March, Andy? HA!

I scoff at your claims of oldness. :P

*scoff scoff scoff*

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I am glad you have yielded to my obviously superior fogeyhood.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Get off my lawn!

Damn kids...

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III

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Get off my lawn!
Damn kids...

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