Wirthling Discovers The Bathroom by Rabid_Weasle 1-26-05

At last, a home fit for a bodyless king!

Bathroom Physics by Rabid_Weasle 1-26-05

One day at the outhouse... So then I says, "Them bowels ain't gonna be inspected for human intestinal parasitic worms by themselves." Haha! What the fuck are you talking about?

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Poop.

Restaurant Physics by Rabid_Weasle 1-26-05

One day at the steakhouse... So then I says, "Them orange roughy a la Florentine ain't gonna slowly marinade themselves in in a fine beurre blanc all by themselves." Haha! What the fuck are you talking about?

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Poop.

"Surprise Enchilada Day" starring Goo-Goo and Ying-Yang by biped 1-26-05

First, we eat the Mexican food. Then it turns into shit! Then we come in here and "take" a shit. It smells real good, too! Especially mine! Then we put the doodies in people's food when they aren't looking. And that's how "Surprise Enchilada Day" was born!

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Hobbies by Scyess 1-26-05

Man... I gotta go... AAAAAHHH!! Don't even think about it! Um, is there any particular reason Jon is in the fetal position behind the couch in a pool of his own filth? I've been telling him he needs to take up a hobby, but this...

Conversations You Don't Have Every Day by Scyess 1-26-05

So, um, toilet... ...yes? Do you have any nuggets of wisdom for me? Please don't use the word "nuggets." Oh. Sorry... I guess I'm not used to talking to a poop recepticle... Yeah, I suppose Miss Manners probably never covered that topic.

Ulterior Motives by Scyess 1-26-05

Could you talk this whole time? Oh, of course. But we household fixtures tend to be somewhat introverted. So, um, can I get you anything? No, thanks. I'm fine. Nothing? Breath mint? ENOUGH! JUST SAY IT! I KNOW YOU WANT TO CRAP INTO MY MOUTH!

Stall Technique by Scyess 1-26-05

So you really don't mind if I crap into you? It's a living. While you do I can tell you about my trip to the Carribean. There was this cute little bidet sharing my room... Um, do you mind? It's kind of hard to go with you talking... Oh, sorry. I don't want to be a bother. I can understand why it might be hard. I won't say a word. I know when to keep my mouth shut, so don't worry; I'll...

Fun Uses for Community College Classes by Scyess 1-26-05

Dammit! all right! You win! I'll just hold my bowels until I explode!! Hey, no, not on my account, really... Those ventriloquism lessons were worth every penny.

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"Old" is the old new.

Scyess = Ha!

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

Props to rabid

Just to be silly:

The Ty-D-Bowl Man's Worst Nightmare by kaufman 1-27-05

Let me get this straight. All five of you want to get into MY boat?

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Three cheers for Rabid! Hip-Hip--

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

Hooray!

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

Sucker! by choadwarrior 1-27-05

How's the calimari? Very fresh.

Would You Like Flies With That? by choadwarrior 1-27-05

WAITER! Yeeee-es? This soup is scalding my ass.

Dirty Bomb by choadwarrior 1-27-05

Whoo! Someone made a stinky! I'd better light a match. IT'S A TRAP!