I'd like to apologize in advance to anyone who didn't appreciate being killed in this series. Also, if you'd like to be killed in comic form, let me know. I'll include you in a future "Deleted Scene" comic.*

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland by niteowl 4-21-05

Time for you to die, DX. Why? Because you've been dicking around a little too much lately. The hell are you talking about? Good luck dicking around in the afterlife. GAH!

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (2) by niteowl 4-21-05

Hello Ivy. Time to meet your maker. Uh oh, there's a killer at Walmart. So tell me, how did you manage to slip past that 80 year old, tough as nails security guard? Enough of the small talk- Oh, I get it. This is part of my training, right? I don't think so. You know, there are a lot worse employees here that you could've killed.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (3) by niteowl 4-21-05

Ah yes. Filing Clerk, VIP. We meet at last. The copy machine is behind me, but it's broke as usual. I don't need copies made. I'm here to kill you. Haha! That's a good one! So who put you up to this...Paco? You really should put that gun away, you could shoot somebody's eye out with that. That's the idea, sucker. You need to switch to decaf, my friend.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (4) by niteowl 4-21-05

Meanwhile, back at the gangster's hideout...Who is behind this nefarious plot? Boss, there are almost 50,000 members at Stripcreator...how do you expect me to kill them all? That figure is a little misleading, since a whole slew of people have 2 or more accounts. Anyways, how many have you knocked off so far? 54. This could take a while. Not really. You are not expected to kill EVERYONE there, just the most vocal members. We can brainwash the rest into doing our bidding for us. Who are you planning on hitting next? Some forumuser characters, mainly the ones with drinks in their hands. You should probably wear a gas mask. You might get a little woozy if they breathe on you.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (5) by niteowl 4-21-05

Hello Kajun. Aye. *gurgle gurgle* I'm here to kill you. Aye? I love killing drunk people. There's so much alcohol coarsing through their veins that instead of just bleeding, they catch fire when you shoot 'em. AYE!

* - Let me know which character should be used to represent you. Otherwise, I reserve the right to choose a character...and you may not like it.

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (6) by niteowl 4-21-05

Hello chicka. I'm here to kill you. Yeah right. Here's a quarter, call someone who cares. Now I see why they call you attitudechicka. Nice gun. I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess you got that at the Everything's $1 store. Perhaps, but it's the perfect thing for adjusting attitudes. Eat lead. That is so weak. You call yourself a killer? Wuss.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (7) by niteowl 4-21-05

Well, well. If it isn't dcomposed... Hey nigger homo. I'm no nigger. I'm not gay either. I'm a murderer. And you can consider yourself dead. I'm already dead, fool. Dongs.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (8) by niteowl 4-21-05

*BANG* *ricochet* Hello Spankling. Goodbye Spankling. Ha! *BANG* *ricochet* Shit. Hahaha! What a poor shot you are! *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* Never aim for the chest...aim for the head... At least the nipple clamps deflected the first two shots.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (9) by niteowl 4-21-05

Good afternoon, choad. So you're here to kill me, right? That is correct. Go ahead, I'm not scared. The idiots in this office have been killing me for years anyways. Now I feel really bad. Psychopathic murderers shouldn't feel bad. Hey, wanna take care of the chubby girl in the purple outfit on your way out?

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (10) by niteowl 4-21-05

Hello Brad. I heard that you're killing off the members of Stripcreator and I don't like it. You're not going to kill me, are you? Of course not. We need you to continue running Stripcreator. You'll just be working for us now, for SC will be the home base for our band of extremists bent on taking over the world. Take over the world? Shit, I don't want to be involved in anything like that. A bit of advice, Brad: Don't ask questions. Just do as you're told. Contrary to the comics that have been made about me, I do not go down on guys. Just FYI.

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (11) by niteowl 4-21-05

Look who we got here...the infamous MikeyG. Go fuck yourself with a lead pipe, you festering boil on a witch's twat. It's too bad I have to kill you. With a mouth like that, you could really help our cause and our goals. Speaking of mouths, why don't you warm yours up by gobbling on my knob for a while? I really hate to do this. Fucking pussy.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (12) by niteowl 4-21-05

Hello niteowl. Prepare to die. Ok, what did I do now? You make too many political strips, too many strips degrading pop stars and God. There's too much sarcasm in your so-called work. Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke, that's my motto. You do realize I'm making this series, right? You can, and will be, replaced.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (13) by niteowl 4-21-05

Mr. Kaufman, how are you? I'm gonna die right? Yes. Die. When choosing the dye, though, make sure I'm a blonde. Huh? Blondes have more pun.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (14) by niteowl 4-21-05

Meanwhile, back at the gangster's hideout... How is Phase one of the plan going? Good, sir. Pretty soon, there will no one left at SC but the weak-minded. We finally learn the truth... Excellent. Finally, the activism will stop. Those renegade strippers making cruel jokes and unfair assumptions about the Republican party will finally be eradicated. Mr. DeLay, why did we have to kill all of them though? A lot of them strippers never did any political strips. That doesn't matter. They didn't vocalize their beliefs and political opinions, so we have to assume they're just as much the enemy as those who wouldn't shut up about left wing bullshit. Right.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (15) by niteowl 4-21-05

Those left wing pinkos are finally gonna get what they deserve- Hold on Tom, we've got a problem here. Oh shit! Get out of my laboratory! Oh no, I left my gun in the car. I am Doctor Pedantic. You killed almost everyone at Stripcreator. Prepare to die.

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (16) by niteowl 4-21-05

Hello? HELLO? Your boy is unconscious, DeLay. The phone is also tapped, which means that soon your entire plan will be made public. Have fun rotting in jail, you fucking troll. AHHHH! NOOOOOOOO! Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go back in time, kill your hitman and save everyone at stripcreator!

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (fin) by niteowl 4-21-05

Doctor Pedantic went back in time and wasted the hitman before he got a chance to start his killing spree and consequently, saved everyone! Because Dr. Pedantic went back in time, Tom DeLay didn't get charged with any crime regarding SC. Everyone lived happily ever after anyways. TOBOR LOVE TOM'S SWEET ASS. Coming Soon! The Collector's Edition DVD with deleted scenes featuring the deaths of psycoma, BigFrank105, PhreakyChinchilla, boorite, and many, many more!

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

These rocked my socks. Especially the one with Kajun in it.

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

I would love to be killed (again... seeing as I just died in BigFrank's series). Great set, duuuuuuude!

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Destroying my reputation one post at a time.

Thanks guys.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (Deleted Scene #1) by niteowl 4-22-05

*CLICK* *CLICK* *CLICK* *CLICK* Good morning, Inflatable Man. I'm here to kill...God damnit, I'm out of bullets. AHHA! Now what are you going to do? This. You're going stand there and stare at my dick through that thing? *POP* No. Think back to when you were a kid. The sun shining brightly. Ants. Magnifying glass. Finding the correct angle... Ow! You popped me!

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (Deleted Scene #2) by niteowl 4-22-05

Hello psycoma. I'm here to kill you. Ok, whatever. Remember, I worked at Blockbuster for a long time and I've seen it all. A piddly-assed gun doesn't scare me. You better be scared! You're gonna die! Listen, dicksmack...I've got things to do, so scram. Uh, what the hell just happened? I SAID GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY HOUSE!

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

I can't wait until I die!

I gotta get you in "Who Robbed Bigfrank", niteowl.

I think your detective should have a face-off against his killer... since they're basically... y'know... the same character.

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Destroying my reputation one post at a time.

Hey, what a coincidence. Neither can I.

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

My soul is already dead, all that remains is the crunchy outer shell. The bitter tasting outer shell. The dove weeps.

[/livejournal]

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Poop.

I wanna die. Though I'd actually probably evade the shot. Or not.

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Utterly Worthless, maybe. But complete waste of time? Absolutely!

I'm the kinda guy whose last words would be me complaining about chewing the Cyanide tablet instead of swallowing it.

Damn bitter pill taste.

*thunk*

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Destroying my reputation one post at a time.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (Deleted Scene #3) by niteowl 4-23-05

Hey, you're that guy who's going around killing everyone at stripcreator. That's right, pslock...and you're next. I don't see a gun, so how are you going to kill me? HEY IS XMEN 2 OUT YET? LOOK I RETURNED THIS VIDEO AND I OPENED IT UP! I KNOW THERE'S A DISPLAY BEHIND YOU BUT DO YOU HAVE GIGLI IN STOCK? AHHH! Acting like a retarded customer sure is a lot more efficient than using a gun.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (Deleted Scene #4) by niteowl 4-23-05

Later... Did you get umfumdisi yet? Yeah. I ran him down with my Little Red Corvette.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (Deleted Scene #5) by niteowl 4-23-05

Hello BigFrank. What's up? Not much, just killing and maiming some motherfuckers today. Cool. GO PACK GO! Damnit anyway. I was gonna let Frankie live, but unfortunately for him, I'm a Vikings fan. Brett...Favre...rules... *gurgle gurgle*

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (Deleted Scene #6) by niteowl 4-23-05

I think I'm in heaven. *gulp gulp gulp* Green bliss. *gulp gulp gulp* Later... I heard you had a hard time putting Jes Lawson out of his misery... I tried drowning him in a vat of Absinth, but he drank it all. So I took him to a soccer game, where a riot broke out and...

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (Deleted Scene #7) by niteowl 4-23-05

Hi there, Phreaky. I suppose you're here to kill me. No, I'm a messenger. Chubby wrote some poems declaring his eternal love for you and I'm here to deliver them. NOOOOOO! Too easy.

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

Kill me... kill me... [/full metal jacket]

So, is someone gonna kill me or what?

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Poop.

Here you go Rabid...

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (Deleted Scene #8) by niteowl 4-23-05

Wangs. Huh? WANGS! Dude, what the fuck. I don't understand why so many people at stripcreator are infatuated with a word processor from the 70's.

Also..

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (Deleted Scene #9) by niteowl 4-23-05

Excuse me, sir. My name is Dark Pulse. Would it be too much trouble for you to kill me? Hey, no problem. Thank you very much. You're welcome. Later.

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (Deleted Scene #10) by niteowl 4-24-05

Hello boorite. How are you? Let's just get this over with, alright? Um, ok. I'm a busy man, and I don't have time for childish games and tomfoolery. You were supposed to get on your knees and start sucking, bitch.

A Hitman in Stripcreatorland (Deleted Scene #11) by niteowl 4-28-05

Alright, Possums- YAY! I GET TO DIE! Make sure you shoot me in the head, massive amounts of blood spatter will look cool on the sidewalk. I'm not going to shoot you. Lame. I'm kidnapping you and forcing you to watch Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind on DVD, including all the special features. AHHHHHHH!