About 15 years ago, in the ancient days of BBS's, I wrote some Discordian stuff. This was pre-dating "Davinci Code". fnord. Illumanati conspiracy theories, pop culture, umberto eco/dennis miller arcane references, ancient numerology (alchemy/kabballah type stuff)

It was really a collection of disjointed ideas and fragments. Articles and half musings or lists. Anything from a theory about Mr Green Jeans and Captain Kangaroo to a retelling of ancient mythology.

Some one thought enough of this to cull together a 211 page, illustrated bound book and publish it.

http://books.lulu.com/content/249700

I found it by doing a google search on my name. (yes, big stretch, Kaenash is Kanash).

It was a bit surreal. Sort of like finding out a cassette tape of yourself singing in the shower some how made you famous in Germany (where you don't know anyone).

Granted, the book isn't flying off the shelves at 16,000th place in the sales rankings on lulu. However it has a bar code and I must say I am absolutely flattered that anyone thought enough of what I wrote to have wrote the book.

Anyway, I share it with you. I haven't actually read it yet. I ordered it right away and I hope it will arrive in the next week or so. It may be totally out of context and fragmented. I have no idea how they edited it together, as when I wrote it, I had not intended it to be printed in a book format. So I make no claims that this is the best book ever. In fact, seeing the creative minds on the Internet and what you all do on StripCreator I am humbled.

However, in those days before the electronic era, we were amused by a top 10 david letterman list, so there was a lot more wide open space. not like today where a 12 year old can make a flash animation of Conan OBrian turning into a pokemon set to customized music.

If you are not familiar with Eris and Discordianism, it was chiefly inspired by Principia Discordia (written in the 70s and I think published by the same company). It has its roots in Zen teachings and is mostly silly, but there are some practical applications as well.

If you want to say what a douche bag I am or whatever (Crabby, I am talking to you specifically) you can just save it. I am posting this because I am really quite surprised that the book was published and I just had to share it with my friends.

Since I do not have any friends, you people will do.
;)

congats! you got a copyright on that? (poor man's or otherwise)

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Kill Whitey.

"All rights reversed" was what I put in the stuff I wrote. However, the publisher may actually have the rights to it.

I wrote to them and they knew exactly who I was and are in touch with the guy who wrote Principia Discordia in the 70s.

I once got $250 (and two copies of the book it was in) from Llwellyn publishing to make an article from a website I created about how to buy all your pagan supplies on a welfare mom's budget.

And I used that $250 to pay for groceries since I had traded all my food stamps for crack.

Ahh...those were the days.

So yeah, if they're selling that for money and you didn't sign any sort of contract with them that said "I get no money" and the material wasn't public domain, you should get money from them. Cause let me tell you, you don't get chicks on being published alone. Not to mention you have to support a crack habit somehow.

With great power comes great responsibility.

Good job on whatever you've accomplished. I got bored and stopped reading immediately.

I'm reading a manuscript right now that I was asked to provide an endorsement quote for the back cover. I know both of the co-authors and so far, I don't like it, probably because I can hear the voice of the co-author I've never really liked. I'll still whore my name out, because I have a lot of respect for the other co-author. What the hell--it's not like anybody will buy it.

I love how positive you are, choad.

I often read books.

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

i'm working on a movie script right now.
LOTR meets Real World (not the title). i should've finished it a year and a half ago, but i keep running out of pot and having to go to work and stuff.

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Kill Whitey.

I really wish LOTR would die already. The more people obsess over it, the cheaper that movie series seems to get.

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Mediocrity at its most average.

Oh and writing a book is cool. Now you should probably find a way to get your money.

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Mediocrity at its most average.

Although the subject matter of the book sounds like the love child of pedantic and terminally boring, congrats on having your name out there. I hope you get some money out of it.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

Embrace the cheapening. It's the only way.

Once upon a time, I got a call from a senior editor at Playboy. He asked if I was the author of some article I had posted on teh intarnets some years back. I was. So they sent me $250 and printed it. Being a lifelong college student, I was confused. Usually, I had to pay for someone to read my writing.

The piece was about "very special" guitar effects pedals, and it went like this:

Time distortion: Makes guitar solos seem longer. Can also be achieved by ineptitude.
Blame shifter: Shifts the pitch of mistakes down one octave so that the audience thinks it was the bass player.
Depander: Filters out popular cover songs.
Overjive: Makes Hootie songs sound like Parliament.
Active pickups: Amplifies "signals" sent to attractive audience members.
Fluff box:: Filters out excessive musical substance.
Rehash: Stores and plays back your favorite riffs constantly and forever.
Feedback Eliminator: Drowns out "constructive criticism."
Band Pass Filter: Eliminates sexual advances between band members.
Depressor: Changes any chord to E minor.
Paralytic Equalizer: Makes you as good as other guitarists by injecting them with nerve toxins.
Off switch: Improves the sound of your amplifier.

The guys at SFX Machine RT (audio effects software) saw fit to devote a bank of presets to these disreputable items.

omg intarnets

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What others say about boorite!

Embrace the cheapening. It's the only way.

Once upon a time, I got a call from a senior editor at Playboy. He asked if I was the author of some article I had posted on teh intarnets some years back. I was. So they sent me $250 and printed it. Being a lifelong college student, I was confused. Usually, I had to pay for someone to read my writing.

The piece was about "very special" guitar effects pedals, and it went like this:

Time distortion: Makes guitar solos seem longer. Can also be achieved by ineptitude.
Blame shifter: Shifts the pitch of mistakes down one octave so that the audience thinks it was the bass player.
Depander: Filters out popular cover songs.
Overjive: Makes Hootie songs sound like Parliament.
Active pickups: Amplifies "signals" sent to attractive audience members.
Fluff box:: Filters out excessive musical substance.
Rehash: Stores and plays back your favorite riffs constantly and forever.
Feedback Eliminator: Drowns out "constructive criticism."
Band Pass Filter: Eliminates sexual advances between band members.
Depressor: Changes any chord to E minor.
Paralytic Equalizer: Makes you as good as other guitarists by injecting them with nerve toxins.
Off switch: Improves the sound of your amplifier.

The guys at SFX Machine RT (audio effects software) saw fit to devote a bank of presets to these disreputable items.

omg intarnets

You can always word your praise ambiguously:

"A unique book, and the best of its kind!"

"Kept me on the edge of my seat, yearning for the ending!"

"You won't find writing like this on the bestseller racks!"

"Written in English!"

etc.

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What others say about boorite!

"I couldn't put the book down! Seriously, there was superglue all over my hands. Someone please get this damned book off me!"

I was a freelance concert reviewer for the Buffalo News back in 1995. But it barely paid, they kept forgetting to put me on the guest lists (so I had to finagle and haggle my way in), and they sent me only to the shittiest concerts, so I quit. I was in my brief "I want to be Greil Marcus" phase then, so my reviews often had less to do with the band then with me liking the sound of my own voice as I discussed the politics of "the scene," etc.

I also was the music editor at my college paper, where I prayed for the crucifixion of Alanis Morrissette, told 54/40 to retire (to their faces), and generally acted like I thought I was Lester Bangs.

I kinda miss those days sometimes.

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I has a flavor!

The book finally came in the mail!

wow, I am amazed at what I wrote.
In some cases, I do not recall writing it. Back in those days I would get online around 3am and be drunk, because I worked in nightclubs.

I guess I am funnier when I am drunk. They could have at least corrected some of my spelling in some cases.

There is a good deal of illustrations in the book. They kept all my quotations, which is really nice to see. I put a lot of cryptic references. Back then I was reading a lot of obscure 18th century philosophy and also doing alot of study on spirituality, which led me to the Discordian beliefs that I still hold firmly today. I am also of the firm belief that it is unwise to maintain firm beliefs.

Let me know if anyone gets the book. I do not get any revenue from it, but I'd be curious what your thoughts are.

Can I go to a bookstore and buy it? Any idea on price?

http://books.lulu.com/content/249700

Can be ordered online here, it is a nice binding. Much better than I expected. Glossy.

I would not expect you to buy it, unless you were going to use it to mock me. However, since you asked at this time you can only get it here. It does have an ISBN number attached to it, but the only way that book store chains can order it is, if you go through their distributor, which may or may not have set up a deal to order through lulu. I did a little research and Lulu will only set you up for distribution if you invest like 150 bucks.

since I am not the publisher, I get nothing. However, I thought about re-releasing the book as a "King James Version" with a lot more content.

That's a given.

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Okay, Lindsay, are you forgetting that I was a professional twice over - an analyst and a therapist. The world's first analrapist.