...that local newscaster, Tom Joles, was doing a story on high profile celebrities and having had a mugshot taken in their past for prior indiscretions when they were young. Unbeknownst to Mr. Joles, a savvy show producer by the name of Matt Shark had taken it upon himself to search his past and find a mugshot that was taken of Mr. Joles back in his college days. Apparently while in the midst of a alcohol induced rage at a local frat party he was arrested for public drunkenness and disorderly conduct.

Anywho, as Mr. Joles was on camera and reading through his story he soon realized that a mugshot of himself had been put on the screen. At first he was a bit flustered and stumbled over a few words, but he quickly became enraged, jumped out of his newscaster chair and began chasing the young producer around the studio yelling, "YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

THE END.

I awoke at 4:30 this morning rolling around in bed and laughing, my girlfriend did not find this as amusing and now thinks some sort of medication would be best.

Feel free to post your dreams here.

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obscenity filter is off

I had a dream that I was visiting some friends in my ole hometown when, suddenly, vampires attacked us.  I managed to save myself and my friend (and former crush) Kerra through my wiles and some serious bluffing.

Then I dreamt that I was the new executive producer of Saturday Night Live and I was fighting with the network because I wanted Paul Westerberg as my first musical guest and they were trying to stick me with Fall Out Boy.

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I has a flavor!

A long time back, I dreamed I was listening to a review of Stripcreator on the radio, and the critic said "Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

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What others say about boorite!

I had a dream that I was best friends with Michael Barrymore and he was driving me about in his little BMW when I saw some of my Mother's friends and introduced them to him as my Best Friend, he then got pissed at me for telling people about us as he knew the public would suspect me as his Bum boy so to solve this he tried to kill me by smashing my side of the car into a wall. We both survived though and it went into trippy dreamy shit that I don't have the vocabulary to describe.

Michael Barrymore

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Poo perhaps?

I had a dream people like this didn't exist:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20179059

Then I woke up, saw that, and jumped off a bridge.

boorite

I remember that.

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Mediocrity at its most average.

Boorite and I just completed 4 hours of a hunter safety course. We have nine more hours starting at 8am tomorrow.

I have a feeling by the end of the class, I'll be ready to shoot someone.

ivytheplant

With love?

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You don't know what I got... .

With bullets (not cum).

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Dad was flammable

Damnit, that was supposed to go in announcements.

But I did have a dream last night that I was hunting rednecks. I blame the class training videos. It's all the worst of the 70's combined with all the worst of class training videos.

I had a dream last night that for some unknown reason I was granted all of Supermans abilities, AND I could use the force.

That was fucking sweet.

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The following statement its true. The previous statement is false

Last night I dreamt I was Aquaman.

Where's the rest of the Justice League?

I forgot to mention that I used my Superman/Jedi powers to fight none other than Lord Voldemort!

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The following statement its true. The previous statement is false

The last note-worthy dream I had involved me and Angelina Jolie dressed as a nurse doing 'grown-up hugs'. Then my girlfriend came home and she joined in too. Which I thought was rather decent of her. Unfortunately I woke up shortly after and it turned out I was late for work.

I haven't been a super hero/had super powers yet though.

El_Phen

Having sex with Angelina Jolie and having your girlfriend join in IS a superpower.

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

Last night I dreamt I took on 2,000+ Nazis with only a ridiculously large sword and a cleaver.  And won, too.

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I has a flavor!

Last night I dreamt my boss had been fired and the only replacement they could find was me. Despite my protests, they promoted me and gave me three times the salary I have now. Sounds good, right? Well, they made me take his office with the bad window that can't deflect the burning sun and his computer which not only has Norton on it, but was covered in spider egg sacs. And apparently his office was my brother's childhood bedroom and we couldn't figure out how to place my desk so that it was away from the spiders but not blocking the bunk bed. And I had to work from 8am-10pm. Screw that.

Yesterday afternoon I dreamed my mother died in a flood. In her house. It was really screwed up. I tried to help her and failed. What the heck does that mean?

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Mediocrity at its most average.

You're worried that you won't be able to deal with a crisis?

I had a dream that a government scientist experimented on his goth/emo daughter because he thought she would be better off. So he wiped her brain and turned her into a robot that, upon touching people, would make them lactose intolerant. He thought that not as much milk would be used and people wouldn't starve.

I had a dream that I was in a Blur music video, walking and singing with a young Damon Albarn.

Then all of a sudden the music video set turned into me working in a huge supermarket, but the place was run by the church, and everytime you broke a store rule they would threaten you with "If you keep that up, you'll end up going downstairs", to which I sarcasticly replied "The basement?".

To illustrate the point that they ment Hell, they then summoned a dancing Darth Vader to chase me around the shop. I ran about laughing though, shouting how Darth Vader was a fictional character, most likely like their God.

I seriously wonder what the fuck goes on in my head sometimes.

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The following statement its true. The previous statement is false