Desperate Horsewives 1 by biped 4-25-09

Hi, Anita! Just dropped by to see how the new Mrs.--err--Horsedick is doing today. Hi, Mom. You just missed Harry. Oh, did you see the new mailbox with our name on it? Oh, yes. The pink daffodils are a lovely touch. And it says "HORSEDICK" in such nice... big...letters. That's Old English. Just like the towels and bed linens. And soon, our shrubs will spell it out across the lawn. We'll have the marriage annulled. We'll move away. Or, we could have him killed-- Mother, we've had this discussion before. I'm a Horsedick now, and that's final.

Desperate Horsewives 2 by biped 4-25-09

I think you'll find our reservation under the name of Long. Mrs. Gladys Long. Or, it could be under the name Long-Horsedick. Mrs. Anita Long-Horsedick. Oh honey, you're going to be getting horrified stares like that for the rest of your life...! I don't care, Mom. If Horsedick doesn't suit them, they're just going to have to suck on it. Oh my god! I could've died when they announced "LONG-HORSEDICK! TABLE FOR LONG-HORSEDICK!" Mother, you're just making it worse.

Desperate Horsewives 3 by biped 4-25-09

...and this is my new son-in-law, err, Harry. Harry what? Oh, I can't BELIEVE it! I never thought I'd say the words "Harry Horsedick" to Father O'Mallard! I just know it's some kind of SIN! Mom, for Pete's sake, get ahold of yourself. I know it's late, but...I was hoping you could hear my confession. Oh, my. I'll wager this has something to do with that hairy horse dick.

Desperate Horsewives 4 by biped 4-25-09

Mom...Harry (sob) got hit by a bus. He's...he's dead. (choke) HOO-RAY--I mean, aww, honey. I'm so sorry. YAAAAY!!! HE'S DEAD!!! THE HORSEDICK IS DEAD!!! NO MORE HORSEDICK!!! HA HA HA HA HA HA!!! My god, Gladys--I've never seen you display such callousness. Later... Mom, I'm pregnant. So I'm keeping my married name, and our son will be named after Daddy. Ahh. I see. (sigh) Well, I'm sure Buck will be pleased.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Sheer brilliance.  

I'm going to send that series to someone I used to work with who married a guy with the last name of Titsworth. 

Thanks!

I have a cousin named Peggy Butts who was always sensitive about her name, too.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Oops, sorry.  Meant to bump somebody else's thread.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

biped

You shouldnt be bumping threads...you dont know what they might be carrying >_>

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I will rate you hard, and unendingly.

I know I shouldn't, but I have one of those compelsions that Barney Fife used to talk about.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.