I just finished my first series! Check it out.

BARRY HAS PROBLEMS by crabby 6-25-01

BARRY ARGUES WITH HIS WIFE I KNOW YOU KEEP TELLING ME IM THE FATHER BUT I DONT BELIEVE IT!!! OH MY GOD!!! HOW DID HE FIGURE IT OUT??? BARRY'S CHILDREN LISTEN TO THE ARGUMENT I WAS BUILT TO BE THE PERFECT CHILD WHY DOESNT DADDY LOVE ME??? DANG BRO, DAD IS ACTING LIKE A TOTAL SQUARE. TEN YEARS EARLIER I SHALL BUILD YOU A ROBOT CHILD AND IMPREGNATE YOU WITH MY NATURAL SEED!!! YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU FEEL LIKE BUDDY FOR $200!!!

BARRY HAS PROBLEMS pt.2 by crabby 6-25-01

BARRY'S PROBLEMS GET WORSE SO ARE YOU SAYING YOU WANT A DIVORCE??? MAYBE THAT EXACTLY WHAT IM SAYING SUSAN. THIS WHOLE MARRIAGE HAS JUST BEEN A SHAM YOU'VE NEVER LOVED ME!!! SO SUSAN SEEKS LEGAL COUNCIL SO YOU CHEATED ON HIM SO WHAT!!!! YOU WERE A PROSTITUTE WHAT DID HE EXPECT!!!! WE'LL TAKE THIS JERK FOR EVERYTHING HE HAS. SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN TO ME!!!!!! 3 MONTHS LATER WELL SHE TOOK EVERYTHING. NOW I SLEEP IN THIS TRASH CAN. I LOST MY HOUSE, MY ROBOT SON, AND MY FREAKY BEATNIK SON. OH WHAT A WORLD. TELL YA WHAT PAL WHY DON'T YOU COME LIVE WITH ME???

BARRY HAS PROBLEMS pt.3 (DEATH OF BARRY) by crabby 6-25-01

THINGS ARE STARTING TO LOOK UP FOR BARRY ARE YOU SURE YOUR MOM WONT MIND ME MOVING IN WITH YOU PAL. I SURE HOPE SO OF COURSE THINGS ARE BAD FOR BARRY!!! ummmm.....MOM CAN MY FRIEND MOVE IN??? ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!!!!!! BARRY IS NO MORE!!! I'M GUESSING NO ONE CARES ABOUT BARRY ANYMORE. I HOPE THIS MAKES EVERYONE HAPPY!!!

BARRY MEETS JESUS by crabby 6-26-01

BARRY YOU MAY ASK ME ONE QUESTION!!! HMMMMMM....ONE QUESTION THATS A TOUGH ONE. ANYTHING YOU LIKE IT DOESNT MATTER. LETS JUST CHECK MY LIST OF QUESTIONS TO ASK JESUS. WHY MY MAN HOOD OF COURSE!!!!! WHATS UNDER THE LOIN CLOTH???

With comics like that, you'll be ranked #1 in no time!

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

You don't suck dick!

P.S. - Anyone mind telling me how crabby ended up with that catchphrase?

Yes.

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

I was so charming.

Classic, true classic.

The thread that is.

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Dad was flammable

Ah, those were the days.

Maybe you should branch out ... do a series about a laundromat, or something.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

For some odd reason I never capitalized on the success of my WASH AND WASH MILLENIUM WASH madness with a series. Sadly it is just mentioned a couple of times in my comics.

Here's a good example of my popularity at the time:

CC 42: WASH AND WASH INTELLIGENCE LOSS!!! by BigEvilDan 7-09-01

Finish this sentence: Wash and... ...WASH MILLENIUM WASH!!! FUCK YOU DR. PEDANTIC!!! YOU'RE A SQUIRREL, DAMMIT!!!!! It's exactly what I feared. You've caught crabbitis. You'll be a babbling idiot in a matter of days, I'm afraid. Thanks, Doc. Any idea where I can get some cheap cyanide pills?

It's like a party in my head, and everyone's late.

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I'm not illogical - I'm big-boned.