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Stripcreator » Comic Competitions » CC39: Warm Beer and Cold Women

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Spankling
Looking for love in ALL the wrong places, baby!

Member Rated:

(When freeservers is up, the pic will show. I'm working on a freedom2surf.net account.)

There are 5 rules:
** Degrade at least one of the 4 girls listed here: Jenna Bush, Barbara Bush, Monica Lewinski or Chelsea Clinton.
** Use a line from a Tom Waits song. (ID the song in the post.)
** Include at least one fisting reference.
** Use the ball-dog to portray god - whether real or hallucinatory.
** Do not focus on politics. Make it personal. Enjoy!

I'll select a winner after noon Wednesday, Chicago time.

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

6-22-01 1:47pm (new)
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boorite
crazy knife lady

Member Rated:

Oh sure, start a Tom Waits contest on the afternoon when I'm leaving for vacation! DAMN.

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What others say about boorite!

6-22-01 2:42pm (new)
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boorite
crazy knife lady

Member Rated:

6-22-01 2:54pm (new)
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Spankling
Looking for love in ALL the wrong places, baby!

Member Rated:

quote:
Oh sure, start a Tom Waits contest on the afternoon when I'm leaving for vacation! DAMN.

I check with the judges (Gabe, wirthling, the ghost of Obijo etc...). Do we let this thing ramble on until he gets back or make boo get his in before he leaves?

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

6-22-01 2:55pm (new)
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Spankling
Looking for love in ALL the wrong places, baby!

Member Rated:

Best I could do in under 10 seconds.


nevermind...

---
"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

6-22-01 2:55pm (new)
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kaufman
Director of Cats

Member Rated:

6-22-01 8:58pm (new)
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Spankling
Looking for love in ALL the wrong places, baby!

Member Rated:

For the Waits impaired...http://www.officialtomwaits.com/frame/music/m_lyrics.htm

I highly recommend giving him a listen.

---
"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

6-22-01 9:06pm (new)
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skagg
Comic Overlord

Member Rated:

does "whats he building?" count as a song?

---
Who knows what fear lurks in the hearts of men? MIKE BOBSICO KNOWS! And if you give him a decent tip when he delivers your mail , he might tell you.

6-24-01 8:49am (new)
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Spankling
Looking for love in ALL the wrong places, baby!

Member Rated:

quote:
does "whats he building?" count as a song?
Yes.

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

6-24-01 12:31pm (new)
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Haights
Junior Comic Technician

Member Rated:

[Click to view comic: 'CC39: Clash of the Titans']

"$29.00".

---
"I'm gonna give you cancer." "...what are you, a cellphone?"

6-24-01 6:49pm (new)
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wirthling
supercalifragilisticexpialadosucks

Member Rated:

[Click to view comic: 'CC39: God on a ball...']

The song is "All stripped down."

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

6-24-01 7:53pm (new)
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Drexle
Your Cure for Lameness

Member Rated:

6-24-01 8:11pm (new)
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kaufman
Director of Cats

Member Rated:

6-24-01 8:42pm (new)
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Drexle
Your Cure for Lameness

Member Rated:

Well, looks like kaufman has it in the bag so far. God, that one was freakin' hilarious!

6-24-01 8:55pm (new)
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bunnerabb
Some bloke.

Member Rated:

o/` Those were days of roses, poetry and prose, and Martha, all I had was you and all you had was me, there were no tomorrows, we packed up all our sorrows and we saved them for a rainy day o/`

I Don't have the time to do contests anymore. Notuntil autumn, but I love Tom Waits. :- )

bunner

Over here,
On Tenth and Hennepin

Rock on, then....

---
I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

6-24-01 11:51pm (new)
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BigEvilDan
Comic Overlord

Member Rated:

[Click to view comic: 'CC39: The end is more terrifying than we imagined.']

The song is Earth Died Screaming

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a *****." - Donald B. Jones III

6-26-01 4:28pm (new)
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Spankling
Looking for love in ALL the wrong places, baby!

Member Rated:

Finally, those that don't know the joy of Tom Waits can move on to the next comic. (But may I suggest you rent the movie [I] Rumble Fish and buy the CD [I] Nighthawks at the Diner? Martha says it's a good thing.)

It was great to see how you guys took goofy crap rules and made enjoyable comics - comics that can stand outside of the rules and be funny. I watch. I learn.

But only one can win. I almost never agree with the rulings in these contests, so it will not shock me if others disagree with me. Dog-ball God knows there is an argument to be made for all of the entries. But I believe my buddy Dave made the best use of all the rules, and to him goes the prize.

I pass this trophy, a life-sized bronze replica of Gabe's tool penetrating wirthling's rectum, to you Big Evil Dave. Waive it high over your head. Kiss it. Cry upon it. Enjoy.

When does CC40 begin?

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

6-27-01 10:20am (new)
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BigEvilDan
Comic Overlord

Member Rated:

The rules are currently under construction...

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a *****." - Donald B. Jones III

6-27-01 2:33pm (new)
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boorite
crazy knife lady

Member Rated:

quote:
[Click to view comic: 'CC 39: Jenna Bush is a hot little tramp, ain't she?']

Best I could do in under 10 seconds.


Forgot to say the damn song title: Tom Traubert's Blues.

Not that it matters...

---
What others say about boorite!

6-29-01 10:01am (new)
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Spankling
Looking for love in ALL the wrong places, baby!

Member Rated:

quote:
Forgot to say the damn song title: Tom Traubert's Blues.

Not that it matters...


The thing about Waits lyrics is you could pick them out of anywhere. You here a snippet of conversation and you just know - that's Waits.

I saw his stage show, Franks Wild Years a few years back. Fantastic!

---
"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

6-29-01 10:05am (new)
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boorite
crazy knife lady

Member Rated:

You got to meet me by the knuckles of the skinnybone tree.

---
What others say about boorite!

6-29-01 11:09am (new)
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Spankling
Looking for love in ALL the wrong places, baby!

Member Rated:

Well Frank settled down in the Valley
and hung his wild years
on a nail that he drove through
his wife's forehead.
He sold used office furniture
out there on San Fernando Road
and assumed a $30,000 loan
at 15 1/4 % and put down payment
on a little two bedroom place.
His wife was a spent piece of used jet trash
made good bloody marys
kept her mouth shut most of the time
had a little Chihuahua named Carlos
that had some kind of skin disease
and was totally blind. They had a
thoroughly modern kitchen
self-cleaning oven (the whole bit)
Frank drove a little sedan
they were so happy

One night Frank was on his way home
from work, stopped at the liquor store,
picked up a couple Mickey's Big Mouths
drank 'em in the car on his way
to the Shell station, he got a gallon of
gas in a can, drove home, doused
everything in the house, torched it,
parked across the street, laughing,
watching it burn, all Halloween
orange and chimney red then
Frank put on a top forty station
got on the Hollywood Freeway
headed north.

Never could stand that dog

---
"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

6-29-01 11:16am (new)
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crabby
I have an awesome avatar.

Member Rated:

Not knowing to much about Tom Waits this is the best I could do. However I did make fun of DrPedantic and isn't that really what it's all about???
Several references were made to Tom Waits song throughout the comic.
[Click to view comic: 'dogonaball1 IS ONE PERVERTED GOD!!!!!']

6-29-01 11:58am (new)
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Spankling
Looking for love in ALL the wrong places, baby!

Member Rated:

Sorry. This contest has been closed by management. No refunds.

---
"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

6-29-01 12:02pm (new)
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crabby
I have an awesome avatar.

Member Rated:

DAMN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

6-29-01 12:09pm (new)
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