Friends, Romans, countrymen... lend me a dollar. Or your ear, whichever might be more readily available.

It has come to my attention that the Lowpass CSC Forum has been completely overrun with twits. It is with a heavy heart that I put into action Ultra-Secret Disaster Recovery Plan X4. Those of you in attendence of the first quarter meeting of the Council of Elders will find in your take-home packets an legal-sized manila envelope labeled X4.

You may now break the seal and remove the contents. Inside you will find a detailed description of the plan and the actions required of each of you.

Should you have any questions, please direct them to Sergeant at Arms-Boorite.

Remember that in the event of any of you feeling more stupid than normal you are authorized to use your cyanide capsules.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

Maybe the onslaught of twits is to make up for the absence of ObiJo.

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I am a delicate fucking flower. https://beacons.ai/jesskent

Okay, boo, what in gabe's shorts is going on? What is all the blather about?

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

Yeah, Boorite... who put Gabe in charge of anything beyond wirthling's ass?

FYI, there's a typo in paragraph 3 of section 12, page 38. At the end of the second sentence, 'crate of marmosets' should read 'crate of wombats'.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

Or maybe ObiJo was the only thing keeping the twits at bay. Now that he's gone, we have no protector. I'll see if Superman's available.

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

Kind of like when cats piss on their territory so that lesser cats know better than to come around?

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I am a delicate fucking flower. https://beacons.ai/jesskent

I have a question. Top of page 18, the part about the fruit-flavoured jelly - is this UK/Oz jelly, which is a dessert made of gelatine, sugar and fruit juice, called "jello" in North America, or US "jelly", which I take to mean "jam", a sweet spread made of pureed fruit, stewed and mixed with sugar, generally eaten on toast?

Another question - why do we need ten kilograms of it? Each?

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

quote:

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I have a question. Top of page 18, the part about the fruit-flavoured jelly - is this UK/Oz jelly, which is a dessert made of gelatine, sugar and fruit juice, called "jello" in North America, or US "jelly", which I take to mean "jam", a sweet spread made of pureed fruit, stewed and mixed with sugar, generally eaten on toast?

Another question - why do we need ten kilograms of it? Each?

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quote:

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I have a question. Top of page 18, the part about the fruit-flavoured jelly - is this UK/Oz jelly, which is a dessert made of gelatine, sugar and fruit juice, called "jello" in North America, or US "jelly", which I take to mean "jam", a sweet spread made of pureed fruit, stewed and mixed with sugar, generally eaten on toast?

Another question - why do we need ten kilograms of it? Each?

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quote:

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I have a question. Top of page 18, the part about the fruit-flavoured jelly - is this UK/Oz jelly, which is a dessert made of gelatine, sugar and fruit juice, called "jello" in North America, or US "jelly", which I take to mean "jam", a sweet spread made of pureed fruit, stewed and mixed with sugar, generally eaten on toast?

Another question - why do we need ten kilograms of it? Each?

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Posting this last message three times was just to confuse the enemy.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

Just about anything confuses this enemy.

*throws some shiny things around the room*

See? That should keep them busy.

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III

Excellent. We'll begin immediate airdropping of the 3x5 cards that say 'Turn me over' on both sides.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

...and I will use my guerilla warfare and stealth training to sneak into his house and write the message, "Toilet tennis! For instructions, see opposite wall!" on the walls to either side of his toilet.

It may be months before we see him again.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

You know, the paragraph about the crotchless shinyleather pants and the leather underwear sounds awfully familiar from somewhere....

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

Okay, I get the reason why you mention fruit flavored Jelly on page 18... but why do you then go on to specifically require KY Jelly on page 20, right below the pictures of ... you know who?

Please don't tell me it was included to boost morale... that picture is just plain unnatural. I mean, look at all the pustules! And that rash is just grotesque...

Hey my title is "Sergeant at Arms," not "Sergeant at What's in Gabe's Shorts."

Do not be confused by references to his "weapon."

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What others say about boorite!

It was a field promotion. Desperate times call for desperate geeks.

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What others say about boorite!

Battle Plan #413

Step 1: Induce enemy to climb rope.

Step 2: Wave to enemy.

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What others say about boorite!

Most of the geeks I know are always desperate.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Desperate for COCK.

(That was a subtle JerkCity reference.)

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What others say about boorite!

By the way, which one of you IS "Sergeant at What's in Gabe's Shorts?"

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What others say about boorite!

Why don't all of y'all bitches get the hell outta my shorts. Boorite... dispense with the whup-ass!

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

You know, I didn't notice this until I read through a second time, but... at the bottom of the third paragraph on page 27, is that supposed to be "boiled alive", or "broiled alive"? Please let me know soon; I may have to cancel a very expensive order.

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!