All comics by brycekain

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by brycekain
12-09-14
What's this button do?
That was the g-spot.

 

by brycekain
12-09-14
Salsbury steak?
No.
Anchovy pizza?
No.
Well what the hell DID I have for dinner last night??
*sniff* Just hold on! I'll tell you in a second.

 

by brycekain
12-09-14
COFFEE!!!!!! Coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee.....
I think you've had enough.
I've just come back from the future. There's no punchline to this comic.
Way to phone it in, boss!

 

by brycekain
12-09-14
♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫ I'm inside brycekain's butthole. ♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫
♫♫ Butthole! ♫♫
♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫ I'm inside brycekain's butthole. ♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫
♫♫ Butthole! ♫♫
♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫ Now please shut the fuck up. :) ♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫
♫♫ Stupid John Goodman! ♫♫

 

by brycekain
12-11-14
Sir, where have you been? There's a lot of shit going down after the CIA report!
I bought a pool table.
That's great, sir, but what are you going to do about your approval rating? It's in the tank!
I. BOUGHT. A. POOL. TABLE.

 

by brycekain
12-13-14
Excuse me, but I'm not just a CHICKEN HEAD! I have feelings, too!
That can't be! Because I just cut off your head and now you will give ME head. With your only-head. Chicken......
Roadhouse?
Yeah, sure. We'll go with that.

 

by brycekain
12-13-14
When you said you'd stick it "where the sun DOES shine," I was expecting something completely different.
Fine, but you have to wear a bag over your head and call me Rob Schneider the whole time.

 

by brycekain
12-13-14
9/11
AAAIIEEEE!!!

 

by brycekain
12-13-14
I'm tired of bailing your ass out of jail, bug.
I couldn't help it! That shit was DA BOMB!
Earlier that day...

 

by brycekain
12-15-14
♫♫ Starry, starry night. Paint your palette blue and gray. Look out on a summer's day with eyes that know the darkness in my soul... ♫♫
♫♫Starry, starry night. Flaming flowers that brightly blaze. Swirling clouds in violet haze reflect in Vincent's eyes of china blue... ♫♫
Funny puppet show 5 dolla' extra!
What about a trip around Uranus?

 

by brycekain
12-15-14
What did the dog say when he stood on the ball? WOOF! Get it? WOOF! HA HA HA!
You've been reading newbie comics again, haven't you?
Only for the articles!

 

by brycekain
12-15-14
Ya know. If you drink enough, that doesn't look like a fish anymore. It looks like the grass is having it's period and there's an olive resting on it's clit!
You're welcome.
Yeah.... try to get THAT out of your head now.

 

by brycekain
12-15-14
I can't shut up! I've got explosive diarrhea on top of lactose intolerance and possibly SARS in my colon!
You look like a poop statue.

 

by brycekain
12-15-14
Is this where they put the sodomite semen in the coffee?
No, sir. This is Chik-fil-A.
Gay.

 

by brycekain
12-15-14
Two jews walk into a bar...
That's highly insensitive, Michael. At the holocaust museum, no less!
I'm sorry.
It's ok. We all could learn from this. Just please don't let it happen again.
Two asians walk into a bar.
Ooh! I love a good chink joke!

 

by brycekain
12-15-14
Oh, sweet Jesus!
I've been told I'm a little salty.

 

by brycekain
12-15-14
Hmmm... that looks like a brown flag waving in front of this house.
In fact, it looks like a tongue depressor going into it's mouth!
Must... not... make... dick... joke...
Thoo wait!

 

by brycekain
12-15-14
RAWR! WE BE SUPER HEROS! WE BE TOBOR AND HAMMERBUTT!
Hammer HEAD.
I seriously didn't smoke enough pot to come up with a good punchline for this one.
...and that's why you should stay in school, don't do drugs, and always obey your parents.
You're a fucking retard.

 

by brycekain
12-15-14
Is that snow behind us?
No.
Bird shit?
No.
Then what is it?
Panty waste *

 

by brycekain
12-15-14
Dear Canadian Stereo-type: We here at the B.U.T.T.* are getting tired of all your shit. Meaning: all the food you eat is turning us green!
We have peacefully coexisted with you for years. You send us food, we send out one of our dead. The system has always worked. We have only one small request...
STOP MAKING US LOOK LIKE FUCKING NINJA TURTLES!!!
I could really go for a blumpkin right now...

 

by brycekain
12-15-14
MMM MMM! Man, I would love to tap that!
Well why don't you come over here and get some, sugar?
Not YOU. The green hairy bitch standing behind us.
Oh that. It's on clearance.
HOT DAMN! I loves me some cheap PINUS RIGIDA!

 

by brycekain
12-15-14
Keep stretching.
That's it. Push...
Go towards the light!
Uh... we're in Rupert Murdoch's soul, remember?

 

by brycekain
12-15-14
This holiday season, please remember: whether you're as hard as ME...
or you just want to get a little HEAD...
ALWAYS USE YOUR...
PENIS RESPONSIBLY!
PSST! Why are we doing this PSA again...?
Inter-species necrophelia charges.

 

by brycekain
12-16-14
Uh... why did you leave this thing on the front door?
You know I don't like seeing this kind of crap.
It's your baby brother's placenta. It's full of vitamins and minerals!
Still better than Arby's.

 

by brycekain
12-16-14
Thank you for calling Death Panel, Inc. Have a nice day.
Dude... I killed five more senior citizens today.
How is this making us money again?
It's easy. First we kill the elderly. Then we buttfuck the elderly using their Metamucil as lubrication.
I don't want to know anymore.
Then we drain the Metamucil back into the container and resell it on the black market to fetishists. Obama is really a genius, if you think about it.

 

by brycekain
12-16-14
Did you hear about the new porno Michael Vick was in?
No.
Yeah, he gets ass raped by a pitbull. I hear the next one is going to be a snuff flick!
BUT I'M MICHAEL VICK! AND I DON'T REMEMBER ANY OF THAT HAPPENING!
Which brings us to the next item on our list: Care for another drink?

 

by brycekain
12-18-14
There is a new WW contest open for entries. I'll put a link to it in the comments section.
*sniff* I smell shame. Are you advertising a comic contest on Strip Creator through comics again?

 

by brycekain
12-18-14
What is it like to ride in coach?
Much like your mom's vagina.

 

by brycekain
12-18-14
Ok, honey. I'm back with your pads and...
Were you finger painting again?
Hitler.

 

by brycekain
12-18-14
Hello, my name is Gabe and I'm having these very bad feelings inside. I need to talk to someone and get some help.
Kill yourself.
What? No, I'm not looking for that kind of help. I'm just trying to...
Are you a human?
Yes?
Kill yourself *click*

 

by brycekain
12-18-14
UH - UH - UH - UH UH - UH - UH - UH UH - UH - UH - UH UH - UH - UH - UH
Can I take my finger out now, doc?

 

by brycekain
12-18-14
I'm hard.
Me, too.
ROAD-
No.

 

by brycekain
12-18-14
Want a little head?
You're not little.
Is it my thighs?

 

by brycekain
12-18-14
Should I?
Or should I not?
I think I'll decide in the next comic.
I hope it isn't what I think it is.

 

by brycekain
12-18-14
He decided against it.
What was he going to do?
Oh I don't know if I should...
Go on....
Well, ok. But let me change into something different first.

 

by brycekain
12-18-14
OK! I WILL NOW TELL YOU WHAT THE CANADIAN STEREO-TYPE WAS GOING TO SAY TWO COMICS AGO!
But it was so unimportant...

 

Panty waste.
You happy now?
by brycekain, 12-18-14

 

by brycekain
12-18-14
OMG! Everyone's dead around me! Please, God! Please give me a christmas miracle and bring everyone back to life!
Speaking of xmas, you know what I got for my man-cave? A pool table, an ultra HD big screen tv, and a PS4. You know what they just release for GTA Online? Christmas gear!
So?
So ya'll are fucked. Happy holidays!

 

by brycekain
12-19-14
What do you want?
We're taking census, sir.
Of where? I live at the bottom of the ocean.
That may be, sir, but you still have to take census.
How the fuck are you breathing anyway?
Mr. Kain told me to not say because it would sound incredibly racist.

 

by brycekain
12-19-14
HAHA! YOU QUEEFED!

 

by brycekain
12-19-14
How much farther?
12 parsecs in that direction.
Parsecs? That's used to measure shit in space, not here on earth.
Do you even know what you're talking about??
...in bed.

 

by brycekain
12-19-14
Oi! Blimey! Snockered!
Benja! Bormelia! Perkenchu Nobanaka!
I don't know either.
WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

 

by brycekain
12-19-14
I will kill you, evil squirrel!
Stand still you bastard!
It's not me. God keeps putting me in his asshole.
Richard Gere is God?

 

by brycekain
12-19-14
This is my dog. He is standing on a ball. He has lots of balls and likes his balls very much. He rolls around back and forth. He likes treats and pets.
I love him very much. He is my friend. That is the end of my show and tell. Thank you.
Nice going, retard.
Applesauce!

 

by brycekain
12-20-14
Yes, ma'am. As your lawyer, I'd advise you to stay stone silent and you won't have any problems.
Now I put in a plea of not guilty by reason of insanity. We'll see if we can use your cold nature to convince the jury that you're not in your right mind.
I'm over here.
I was talking to the wall, pecker lips.

 

by brycekain
12-20-14
Stayin' alive! Stayin' alive! AH! AH! AH! AH! STAYIN' ALIVE!
Are you allergic to bees?
Yes, why?

 

by brycekain
12-20-14
YOU'RE going to go make me money.
How?
I ... DO NOT KNOW!
Groovy.
Can I swim back to Fire Island now?

 

by brycekain
12-20-14
Bluh! I vill pass!
No one can pass through God's asshole and live to tell the tale.
Richard Gere is God?

 

by brycekain
12-20-14
I don't want to do comics anymore tonight.
Then don't.
Ok.

 

by brycekain
12-20-14
I think I'm pregnant.
Thank you for watching Pregnant End Theater.
Dude.

Showing page 16.

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