All comics by punkrockskaboy

Profile

 

by punkrockskaboy
8-16-02
Does anyone ever think you're gay?
No, why?
Becuase you wear chaps and carry a saddle everywhere you go.
Does anyone ever think YOU'RE gay?
Why the hell would they think that?
Becuase you eat nuts.

 

by punkrockskaboy
8-16-02
Hey there baby
get lost stick-boy
so...you wanna--
Hell no
What the hell are you doing!?!?!
I'm getting nailed tonight one way or the other

 

by punkrockskaboy
8-18-02
I beat Baldur's Gate today. Finally my hours of nerding have paid off.
Oh yeah?
Yeah, now I have to start the expansion.
I never played it becuase I came to the conclusion that had I started it, I would've gotten addicted. Much like some people I know.
I now have 80 hours of gameplay ahead of me.
I think you just became the topic of my new webcomic.

 

by punkrockskaboy
8-20-02
Joe and I talking on the computer...
hello there
Word
What are you up to?
Setting up Neverwind Nights
Which is?
Worse than crack

 

by punkrockskaboy
8-23-02
Do you think you could cut out the superfluous statements in your forum posts?
I will have to be as sarcastic and rude as possible to get my point across if you don't.
Yipe!

 

by punkrockskaboy
8-24-02
What the fuck?
Hi, I am the annoying paper clip thing that pops up on your computer anytime you try to write a letter, or organize anything on your computer. I'm real now! With NO cancel button!
Now that I am here in reality, I can do more than just help you do things you already know how to do! Now I can help you organize your life along with being incredibly long winded in the process!

 

by punkrockskaboy
8-24-02
You do know you look a lot like Micheal Jackson right?
I have the same sexual desires too.
Yeah, so?
So, you wanna come back to my ranch?
Hell no!
Looks like another night alone with my helper monkey. *sigh*

 

by punkrockskaboy
8-24-02
There Dale sits, reading a magazine. Suddenly the telephone rings!
Shit!
ring ring
The bathroom explodes into a veritable maelstrom of toilet paper, with Dale in the middle of it, his arms wind milling at incredible speeds! Will he make it in time?
Keep ringing! keep Ringing!
Ring! Ring!
Alas no, his valiant effort is in vain. The bell hath sounded. Thou must leave a message.
Dammit, I knew I should have held out until sheila called!

 

by punkrockskaboy
8-25-02
I just don't understand why she doesn't wanna be with me? What have I not got?
I dunno man, I can think of some reasons
I'm funny, smart, I'd like to think I'm attractive, AND I drive a mercedes. Even if she's superficial she should like me.
Well, those are all good points..but...
But What?
You're a big cock.

 

by punkrockskaboy
8-25-02
Doctor, What's the diagnosis?
how can I break this to you?
Doc, what is it?
Well, let me put it this way. If I'm not back again this time tomorrow, carry on.
Carry on? Cuz nothin really matters? I'll heal!?
No, because you're gonna die and I dont wanna run the risk of catching what you've got.

 

by punkrockskaboy
8-25-02
Doctor! DOCTOR! What's happening to me, I think I'm dying!
CHRIST BOB! What's wrong?
I don't know!
Bob, you know you have diabetes, why haven't you taken an insulin shot?!?
I guess I should have thought of that earlier, now I've gone and thrown it all away.
You threw away your insulin? Yep, you're gonna die.

 

by punkrockskaboy
8-25-02
AHHHH!!! Dr. MeHoff, Thank God!
It's a good thing I made this call, what the hell happened to your arm?
Caught in a landslide. Look out! Here comes another one!
are you delirious?
No, no. Open your eyes, look up to the skies and see!
Aw shit.

 

by punkrockskaboy
8-28-02
I won! I won!
Won what?
The sedo-Masochists Anonymous beauty pageant.
well...uh...great, what was your prize?
A barb-covered vibrator.
I bet Tobor can help you think of something to do with that.

 

by punkrockskaboy
8-28-02
Hey guess what, I won this morning.
Really? What was the contest?
I am officially the skinniest woman in town!
What did you win? Well, besides the title.
I don't know, it's in this envelope. I haven't opened it yet. You can if you want.
"Congratulations, you have won 5 free super sized value meals at McDonald's. Now go eat a fuckin hamburger before you disintegrate."

 

by punkrockskaboy
8-29-02
Guess what Maura! They just announced the winner! You are officially the most pessimistic in town!
WOW! I didn't think I would win!
Well, of course you didn't I mean...
FORGET that! What did I win?
This economy size glass of Coke. Sorry, I drank half of it.
Very funny you son of a bitch.

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-04-02
What the hell are you doing?
*pant* My Tai Bo excersizes.
Ummm, Ok...
But why are you dressed like that?
My new internet business. See the webcam? Those idiots will watch a woman vacuum if she's doing it dressed as a school girl!

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-09-02
Dr. Dick and his friend Bob...
Wow...this medicinal shit I stole from the lab is amazing!
No shit. I don't think I have EVER been this high in my whole life.
Who the fuck are you? What have you done with Bob?
What is wrong with you dude?
Get away from me!
What are you talking about Dick? I'm right here.

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-09-02
Yes?
heh heh...heeheeheehee
What is your problem buddy?
HAHAHAHAH!!
Well? What is it?
What the fuck ARE you? hehhehheh

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-09-02
An Unfortunate Situation for Dr.Dick
What are you gonna do to me??
Well, I thought I would start by ripping out your intestines and eating them while you watch...
Then I am going to rip your still beating heart out of your chest and eat that while you die.
Don't let the giant smile on my face confuse you, I am actually quite horrified.
Good, otherwise this just wouldnt be worth it.

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-10-02
You are a moron!
Come look at this guys! No matter what I say to this stupid goat, he just sits there! HEY GOAT...YOU SUCK!
didn't that piss you off?
Nah. Besides, he was having so much fun taunting me, he didn't even realize he was standing in my shit for 20 minutes. By the way, watch your step.

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-10-02
What's a dickfore?
hahaha!! I can't believe you just fell for that.
No, really...I wanna know.
Oh, in that case, follow me...
Oooohhh...

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-16-02
umm hi...Sub?
Hey punk...glad you could make it! Did you meet my friend Joseph?
Hi, I'm Jotheph.
Hi Joseph...I didnt know this was a costume party...
Cothtume party?
Taxi!

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-16-02
Sub, on the night of the party, re-reads the RSVPs
Sub, I regret to inform you that I will NEVER EVER, be caught dead at your party. Burn in Hell, Dcomposed.
Dear Assface, Good luck getting anyone to even think about coming to your party. Sincerely, DexX
Sub, If anyone shows up at your party, it'll be your family, and only because they feel sorry for you. Worst Wishes, PunkRock
Sub, I'm not coming...no way in hell. Sincerely, gabe_billings
Dear Sub, I wouldn't be caught dead at your pathetic excuse to make friends. Love, Mom
*sniff*

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-16-02
After losing a bet, Jared is forced to go to Sub_m7's party in Austria. This is what ensued
Hey! Thanks for coming...let me show you around.
Fantastic....
Remember how I said I was a DJ? Well over here is my turntable and equipment.
Thats just two frisbees and a playschool microphone mounted on an ironing board.
and see...I told you guys I was sexually satisfied!
Well, I find it hard to believe that just because your dick is small and shriveled, it means it has been used frequently.

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-17-02
What transpired the night of Sub_m7's party
Mwuahahaha My guess is that 60-70% of all the people at my party are nerds. So, by blowing up the house, I am within 30% of being the biggest, smartest nerd alive!
Son? What are you doing in here with my vibrator?
Vibrator!? I thought it was a bomb, it is huge and it says TNT!
Oh, honey, TNT stands for "The Naughty Tickler" and as for the size, well, mommy has been stretched worse than a volleyball net over the years. Put it back in my room when you are done playing.
Ok mom...I'll need it for, umm, just a couple more hours *grin*

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-17-02
The night of the party...
Hi Benn_Makk!
Hi Sub_M7!
Strange Coincidence?
Like the party?
Yes I do!
I think not...
Honey...why are you talking to your reflection in the mirror?
Sorry mom...

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-18-02
Hey sub_m7! This party is so cool!
Thanks, I'm glad you are enjoying yourself
This is the best party ever, you are so cool!
Umm, thanks again...
Really, this is the greatest...
Yeah Benn_Makk. Listen, could you stop kissing my ass long enough to stick this tube in it?

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-18-02
Sure thing buddy...damn your so cool.
Ooohh yeahhh...thanks
No problem great one...but what was that for?
Hey Daaviiiiddd!! I'm ready for the gerbil!
Oh thats so awesome! Can I be next!
Sure sure buddy..

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-18-02
So, how about that satan huh? Mr "I'm all powerful and evil" Ohh, well if your so powerful how come you were a whiny bitch when god sent you to hell huh?
and if Christ supposedly died for ALL our sins, shouldn't we be able to sin all we want now? Honestly
Let me tell ya, it is a shame that nuns have to commit to a life of celibacy because they sure do spend an awful lot of time on their knees

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-22-02
Hmmm.....
Where the hell...?
Not in here...
I wonder if...
There you are! Now where did I put that tail?

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-23-02
Sung To Billy Joel's Piano Man:
It's 4:20 in the afternoon, everyone's feeling shigrin.
Cuz nobody has any weed to smoke or a bong to pack any in.
But then he appeared sort of suddenly, and calmly as the wind blows.

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-23-02
with stuff sticky and sweet that packed like concrete
and it smelled as fresh as a rose.
la dah dah deedee daah...la dah deedee daaahh dah.

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-23-02
Pack us a bong, you're the reefer man!
Pack us a bong tonight.
Cuz we're all in the mood for some killerweed and your stuff is lookin' alright!

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-23-02
Now we packed up some weed in a bong of mine.
He said "these hits are on me"
But we paid him some cash cuz we smoked his whole stash. We were lit up like a christmas tree.

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-23-02
I said "Man I believe this shits killing me!"
As a smile stretched across my face.
and I thought that I then saw a shooting star, but the room was just spinning in place.

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-23-02
Oh la dah dah deedee dah...la dah deedee daaah dah dah...
Now I passed it to paul and he took a hit.
He'd never coughed hard in his life.

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-23-02
but he inhaled the smoke and he started to choke.
and lost all his cares and his strife.
and we started to talk about politics...

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-23-02
and thats when we knew we were stoned.
I said "man where did you get ahold of this?"
He said "it came from a plant I once owned."

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-23-02
Pack us a bong, you're the reefer man!
Pack us a bong tonight.
Cuz we're all in the mood for some killerweed and you're stuff is lookin' alright!

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-23-02
So we finished and I put the bong away
We were all pretty stoned for a while
and because of the weed I can't really see...

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-23-02
Plus I'll probably sleep with a smile.

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-23-02
I think I blacked out for a second there!
and I forgot why I am here.
cuz the story I told is just five minutes old, and I am not alright upstairs.

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-23-02
Oh la dah dah deedee dah...la dah deedee daahh dahdah
He packed us a bong! He's the reefer man! He packed us a bong tonight.
We were all in the mood for some killerweed and his shit got us feelin' alright!

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-23-02
I can sing you a song to prove my attraction to you!
Alright, lets here what you can do.
I...I just died in your arms tonight. Musta been something ya said...
I shoulda walked away!

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-23-02
That bad huh?
In a word...yes.
Do you really want to hurt me?
Dear lord
Do you really want to make me cry?
Move slowly toward the door

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-24-02
Joy to the World for I have come. Let Earth receive me.
Let every heart prepare me room.
Let heaven and nature sing, let heaven and nature si-
Oh get off your high horse.

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-24-02
When somebody loves you, it's no good unless she loves you all the way...
I love you honey
I love you too!
Happy to be near you when you need someone to cheer you.
Whats wrong dear?
Come what may!
I lost our first born son in a poker game last night.
GET OUT!

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-24-02
Sung to the tune of "Respect" by Aretha Franklin:
HIV and 3 VDs, Why the hell'd ya give 'em to me?
HIV and 3 VDs? Well, you stuck your dick in me!
Sung to the tune of "Stayin' Alive" by The BeeGees:
Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk, I got anal warts. So what the fuck?
Thats alright, and it's ok, I didn't know you swung that way. But what do you, want from me? I did not give you that VD!
Sung to the tune of "Dancing Queen" by ABBA:
Now I need, penis cream, thanks to your damn VDs
You can bitch! You can crah-hi! You'll still have drips 'til you die!

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-25-02
Deck the shelves with crappy merch, fa la la la la..la la la la
Decorated trees in church, fa la la la la..la la la la
nevermind that it's my birthday fa la la fa la la..la la la
Here comes santa riding his sleigh, fa la la la la..la la la la
christmas has become commerc'lized, fa la la la la..la la la la
USA just closes the blinds fa la la la la..la la la la

 

by punkrockskaboy
9-25-02
It's the end of the world as we know it.
It's the end of the world as we know it.
Off in the distance we here: "Make the bad man stop Dick! Say it isn't so! I don't wanna die..."
It's the end of the world as we know it and...I'M FUCKING FREAKED OUT! Repent! Confess your sins to whichever false diety you worship! The end is near!
Alright buddy, move along. You're scaring the president

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